The Crap We Missed – Friday 9.27.13

Welcome to Friday’s The Crap We Missed, your last chance for the week to cleverly insinuate the sexuality of Joe Jonas or Hugh Jackman and possibly get yourself fired when this or this gets logged in your cache forever. Working sucks anyway, right? And the buzz around town from closet racists is you can buy name brand cereal with food stamps, own a television and have new sneakers without working or wanting to work a day in your life! MERKA!! And speaking of shiny beacons on hills of moron and greed, here’s Jonathan Cheban, totally unaware that he just successfully auditioned for a sex tape, Billy Ray Cyrus not even sweating a parking ticket, because Satan already gave him that twerking money and John Kerry with some other gravely concerned members of the UN just barely staying awake to discuss how various multinational corporate interests will get to slice up and develop what’s left of Syria after we help deliver freedom and democracy to them like we did in Iraq.

*checks watch, one Mississippi, two Mississ– “Shut up and post TITS!!” And the Internet rights itself once again,

- Photo Boy

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Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN