Welcome to Friday’s The Crap We Missed which, as it turns out, is a momentous day for me since I learned that I now control the paparazzi with my mind. That said, it’s no surprise that we found John Travolta hitting up the smorgasbord, Benicio Del Toro not realizing he’s never getting that taste out of his mouth, the dramatic high point followed almost immediately by the low point of this Ducati’s life, and finally Salma Hayek‘s thigh boobs.
Don’t believe me about the mind control? Paparazzi, photograph Michael Douglas in a way that makes him appear to reverse age but stop just short of the point where I have strange feelings recollecting his bare-ass scene from Basic Instinct! Goddamnit. Too far,
- Photo Boy
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Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
Aaaaand coming down the straight away and leading by 3 full lengths it’s Boner Graveyard Troll Fucker
You just won the internet.
I wish there was a prize to give besides the satisfaction of knowing I about peed my pants laughing.
There is no need to read any further on this page. We have a win-nah!
Amazing what a paint gun set on ‘whore’ can do for a woman’s looks in a movie. Real life, on the other hand…
I hope some one is keeping an eye on those Lego kids
That thing has been out of the factory for like ten minutes and they already have to wash it.
Maybe i should have saved that “Boner Graveyard Troll Fucker” comment for this picture.
Bahahaha
Nah…you called it right the first time.
I think we can all agree that Disney is the very incarnation of evil.
If you think differently, consider Lindsay Lohan, Britney Spears and now, an animatronic Travolta.
“I wonder if I should ask him about that gerbil rumor from the 80′s.”
Hell, she was probably there.
He looks like a fucking vamper!
He doesn’t suck blood.
That must be the elusive “Special Edition” Ducati, complete with penis holster and all…
Jake, let’s show Ang right now that we have what it takes to honor Heath’s legacy with a sequel.
Guess you never saw the end of the movie.
uh oh, someone’s not sharing nicely.
I had Count Chocula for breakfast.
John: Me too.
It’s always uncomfortable when lovers can’t acknowledge each other in public.
She mustve just looked at herself in a mirror
“Look man, all I’m saying is that you seem to have so much of it, I’m sure you can spare some follicles….”
Wow, I now find her to be a totally credible musician.
Why o why did Tim Robbins leave this jewel?
Still worthy
Remember the old saying: “For every hot divorcee there is a man somewhere who is fed up with her bullshit.”
“The question was, ‘Would I fuck me?’ The answer, as always, is yes. Yes, I’d fuck me so hard.”
Damn… I need a billion dollars.
For two billion I hear she’ll make it clap for you.
It was supposed to be a “sock” puppet Mario.
Hence the phrase ‘meat puppet’.
Wow, she looks awesome with longer hair. And boobs
Took me a few minutes to notice the hair… but yes… she has nice hair too
Man, just like ol’ times… Until he tries to do the Tornado on her…
More like ‘Zombies on Ducatis’, amirite?
Damn that Panigale’s hot.
It’s pronounced “De Ole Ho”.
I always wondered what the phrase “screwed the pooch” would look like in real life. Just sad Elmo had to suffer for it.
If this was “Hotties On Ducatis”, shouldn’t there have been someone hired specifically to keep her off of one?
Frakkin right!!!
Maybe by “Hotties in Ducatis” they mean that someone is going to be set on fire…
Dressage.
Nice!
Is he still alive? Really! He looks like an animated version of himself running on batteries. Weak batteries.
She’s racist. Or her last name doesn’t begin with K.
Apparently, as part of his Scientology/Midget-wrestling initiation, he must “carry” Tom’s semen for a week…
That or it looks like he’s practicing for the next Scientology convention.
The indignant Prince Harry immediately got on his radio when she refused to lift him in his chair.
“Excuse me, sir? Do you have a hair to spare?”
She reminds me of someone…just not Heather Locklear.
Well, I think we found the one straight guy on the set…
Getting a gay vibe here.
That gay guy finally saw her shoes.
“Where’s my wife? ”
“Don’t worry. We gave her a nice Honeymooooon.”
Classic!
I did not know Los Feliz had a gayng problem.
Beverly Hills’ soup kitchens are fancy.
Is she about to puke or piss herself?
Smells like a swift drop in hotness.
Wow, someone has a shaky hand when applying hair coloring…
Shoe polish applicators can get kinda tricky.
Make up is a remarkable thing, isn’t it?
And distance.
I wish I was that motorcycle right now.
In the back seat…muahahah.
I think any “man” that wears these jeans deserves to be punched in the head.
. . .with the pink shoelaces to boot.
I wonder why he’s wearing a cross?
He made up for it by picking the bacon bits out of his caesar salad.
It looks like he’s using it as a coke spoon. And people here say I’m anti-Christian.
He wears a ring with a Star of David. The cross is just so he’s got all the bases covered.
She is looking sturdy.
Wait a minute…. is that a cross around the neck of the man who played “Hannukah Harry”?
I admittedly use the word “retarded” a little loosely….
but this…
I’m pretty sure that’s his “I’m going to pretend I find something’s funny even though I really don’t think so” face.