The Crap We Missed – Friday 8.1.14

August 1st, 2014 // 354 Comments

On account of Fish and I bailing to go see a matinee of Guardians of the Galaxy like two strong, straight, sports-loving American men are wont to do, here’s your insanely early and hastily tossed together The Crap We Missed, because if I know one thing, it’s that I need to get the large pretzel bites, because I’ll ask him if he’s going to have any, he’ll say no, but then when I get the small, next thing I know half of them are gone and I’ll say “Why didn’t you just get your own?” and he’ll be all “You can just say I’m fat, I know that’s what you’re thinking.” and he’ll post a “feeling depressed” status with no message explaining it to his FB page and just sulk for the entire movie you guys get totally pissed if you have to wait a whole weekend to find out Seal‘s new lady is into assplay.

Catch you on Monday, real jobbers,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: AKM-GSI, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

superficial

  1. Aubrey ODay Cleavage Lingerie Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Her room is not structurally sound. It seems to be bowing in on itself. I recommend an immediate evacuation and cessation of bad Photoshopping.

  2. Chris Brown Checking Out Waitress On Yacht
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hey, who do I have to beat half to death to get a drink around here?”

  3. Jena Malone Lingerie For Love And Lemons Annual SKIVVIES Pparty
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    “Giiirllll….you’ll be a ho-bag…soon.”

  4. Kenny Rogers Pointing To Picture Of Michael Jackson And Bubbles Dan Rather The Country Music Hall Of Fame And Museum
    Commented on this photo:

    “No Dan, I don’t think he was the real father of this one either.”

  5. Vas J Morgan See Through Shirt Lindsay Lohan Saggy Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    Mobile merchandising. Take the product out and show it off in public and see if you get any interest.

  6. Seal Bending Over For New Girlfriend Yacht Sardinia
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    If he keeps any cameras jammed up there, somebody’s going to be in trouble.

  7. Hank Baskett About To Caress John Lucianos Face
    Jackmac
    Commented on this photo:

    “No I don’t want to smell your finger!”

  8. Kelly Brook Cleavage Lingerie Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    This photo needs background music. Specifically, anything from Hootie and the Blowfish’s recently-released album “Cracked RearView”

  9. JWoww Cleavage Fucked Up Face Holding Bottled Water And Iced Coffee
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    The JWoww muppet never tested well with focus groups. The kids would always cry and wet their pants when she appeared.

  10. Taylor Swift Legs Heels Tight Minidress
    j/k
    Commented on this photo:

    Great way to offset that reputation.

  11. Chelsea Handler No Make Up Cellulite Yoga Pants
    Rumble Ingalot
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m pretty sure this is Nick Nolte, or Walder Frey…

  12. Dita Von Teese Cleavage Maternity Line Bras
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    Flip back and forth between this picture and the previous and marvel at the fact that Dita is 41 and MooKow is 33.

  13. Taylor Swift Legs Heels Tight Minidress
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    There’s something annoying about a woman who always looks as though she’s on the set of the latest Macy’s fashion ad photo spread.
    I wanna see this princess all grungey & drunk in public.

    • i wanna she her with her asshole spread…

    • Dr Plaid

      I don’t think she tips off the paps because she knows they will be outside her home anyway, but she is definitely playing a photo op game and winning it every day. She looks too perfect to be just going to lunch or whatever in the middle of the day all by herself every other day. I would love to know if she has a stylist and makeup person on retainer for this. Whatever, I like it.

  14. Kenny Rogers Pointing To Picture Of Michael Jackson And Bubbles Dan Rather The Country Music Hall Of Fame And Museum
    Commented on this photo:

    “So as you can see, this is before he had all that plastic surgery and turned into someone else. That’s always just so sad.”

  15. Jena Malone Lingerie For Love And Lemons Annual SKIVVIES Pparty
    Commented on this photo:

    So…. Lena Dunham doesn’t even get a mention??

  16. Vas J Morgan See Through Shirt Lindsay Lohan Saggy Cleavage
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    His tits are so much perkier. She needs to find a fat chick friend fast.

  17. Kenny Rogers Pointing To Picture Of Michael Jackson And Bubbles Dan Rather The Country Music Hall Of Fame And Museum
    Commented on this photo:

    “This… this is what I wanted my nose to look like… Why is that so fucking hard?”

  18. Hank Baskett About To Caress John Lucianos Face
    Commented on this photo:

    Does his License Plate actually say GAY…

  19. Seal Bending Over For New Girlfriend Yacht Sardinia
    Commented on this photo:

    “I will break you…”

  20. Kenny Rogers Pointing To Picture Of Michael Jackson And Bubbles Dan Rather The Country Music Hall Of Fame And Museum
    Commented on this photo:

    “That’s a monkey. I deep fried a monkey in one of my restaurants once. It was good eating.”

  21. Joe Simpson Vaping LAX
    Commented on this photo:

    So are we officially calling vaping “smoking pole” now? That’s what I get from this photo.

  22. Chelsea Handler No Make Up Cellulite Yoga Pants
    Rico Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    Can’t stand this bitch. That is all.

  23. Hank Baskett About To Caress John Lucianos Face
    Doctor_Joystick
    Commented on this photo:

    “No seriously, smell it. I had it in a dude but it smells like a chick.”

  24. Kim Kardashian Bra See Through Shirt LAX
    Commented on this photo:

    No mention of Khloe carrying her red purse? You are slipping Fish.

  25. Hank Baskett About To Caress John Lucianos Face
    Josephus
    Commented on this photo:

    “Just like that. Curl it a little bit, not too much! Yeah, just like that. I come instantly. She. She comes. What?”

  26. Vas J Morgan See Through Shirt Lindsay Lohan Saggy Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow, it really is just anybody

  27. Hilaria Baldwin Cleavage Bikini Yoga Pose Pool Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Somebody Please kill her!

  28. Kim Kardashian Bra See Through Shirt LAX
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Really does not look like the same woman who was giving head in the lame sex tape. Plastic surgery has done such a number on her face.

  29. Alec Baldwin Chiltern Firehouse
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey, you’ll do!

  30. Vas J Morgan See Through Shirt Lindsay Lohan Saggy Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    he has slight hint of shame on his face…

  31. Karina Jelinek Butt Thong Bikini Paz Cornu
    Ronaldo
    Commented on this photo:

    WOW

  32. Vas J Morgan See Through Shirt Lindsay Lohan Saggy Cleavage
    Eric
    Commented on this photo:

    A fool and his money are soon parted. But at least he got an STD as a parting gift.

  33. Jena Malone Lingerie For Love And Lemons Annual SKIVVIES Pparty
    Commented on this photo:

    She grew up cute. She made some good movies in her teens.

  34. Jena Malone Lingerie For Love And Lemons Annual SKIVVIES Pparty
    Commented on this photo:

    Lena has that look as if someone just told her she can have an extra slice of cake.

  35. Aubrey ODay Cleavage Lingerie Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Fuck yes.

  36. Chrissy Teigen Stomach Shirt Lifting Up Throwing Baseball
    Commented on this photo:

    “Dis how chicken… do whatever this is.”

  37. Taylor Swift Legs Heels Tight Minidress
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s a mouth-breather which I suppose could be handy but not in her case.

  38. Bryan Singer Smiling LAX
    Commented on this photo:

    “We’re off to see the wizard! The wonderful wizard of pedophilia orgy parties!”

  39. JWoww Cleavage Fucked Up Face Holding Bottled Water And Iced Coffee
    Josephus
    Commented on this photo:

    Jeez, she looks like Rachael Ray got fa…she looks like Rachael Ray.

  40. Kenny Rogers Pointing To Picture Of Michael Jackson And Bubbles Dan Rather The Country Music Hall Of Fame And Museum
    cajunhawk
    Commented on this photo:

    “I got in a wrestling match with this little monkey and let me tell you…he knows where the genitals are on a man.”

  41. Chris Brown Checking Out Waitress On Yacht
    cajunhawk
    Commented on this photo:

    “These waitresses ain’t loyal!!!”

  42. Dolph Lundgren Foot Up On Railing At Outdoor Restaurant
    cajunhawk
    Commented on this photo:

    Listen…you’re a zombie right?

  43. Jena Malone Lingerie For Love And Lemons Annual SKIVVIES Pparty
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    The guy in the hat is clearly crossing his legs to conceal an inopportune boner.

  44. Chelsea Handler No Make Up Cellulite Yoga Pants
    cajunhawk
    Commented on this photo:

    Good luck fucking your way to the top when you look like the chick from Monster.

  45. Hank Baskett About To Caress John Lucianos Face
    Commented on this photo:

    “Are the trannies over there?”

  46. Kenny Rogers Pointing To Picture Of Michael Jackson And Bubbles Dan Rather The Country Music Hall Of Fame And Museum
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    ‘I’m a monkey’s uncle!’

  47. Jena Malone Lingerie For Love And Lemons Annual SKIVVIES Pparty
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow. That looks like a hot time – a waifish looking girl in her underwear serenading happy smiling people who look as if they just came in from Its a Small World or from Church. As one who is exceedingly jealous of my off hours, looking at this makes me wonder what compelled these people to attend this concert of apparent lullabies, while sitting on the floor. Was there a cash reward or free liquor offered?

  48. Aubrey ODay Cleavage Lingerie Instagram
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    So he’s taking a photo selfie of a painted selfie? Whooa

  49. Hilaria Baldwin Cleavage Bikini Yoga Pose Pool Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    The difference between how awesome this bitch thinks she is versus how awesome this bitch really is… is… fuck it. Who fucking cares.

  50. Hank Baskett About To Caress John Lucianos Face
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Look I said take my car to the fuckin’ car wash, bitch!

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