Welcome to Friday’s The Crap We Missed where I’d like to point out that Miley Cyrus‘s dang ol’ cleavage is 67 miles away from Fish & I right now and yet we still chose to go see The Dark Knight Rises instead. Special kind of nerd-gay, you say? Sure, but we like to call it dedication penis jokery. Hard dedication. Anyway, today’s round-up also includes Val Kilmer‘s shpants, the last time Joe Calzaghe ever shares a cab with anyone (or started a nightly bleach bath, probably both), and another tender moment with doting father Seal.
Kid said he was a Nikon man, what’re ya gonna do?
- Photo Boy
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Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
She must be moving really fast.
big bird is displeased with his sandwich
We’re on Day 3 of the Pumpkinhead pregnancy watch.
Nope, nothing yet.
And Day 2 of the No Bra = Engagement Is Off Watch rumor that I totally just started.
clearly hercules belongs in a teen style lounge
Staring at the helpings of raisins, Ashton suddenly has a moment of missing Demi. Then he sees the peaches and realizes he really wants to bang the chick in front of him in the line.
Guess how she ate all that ice cream
Needs more blush.
Needs more tush.
Fixed.
Girl in the background: “On no that skank did NOT just fart a chilli’s fart in my face…”
Mickey Rourke definitely smells like a hobo’s asshole.
I won’t inquire regarding your basis for comparison. You are one intrepid explorer, dude.
It involved blindfolds, gloves, and lube.
Ah yes, the legendary “lost episode” of MacGyver.
Seen after waking up on the park bench
Put that sandwich down, FATTY!! Oh… uhmm… sorry about that…
Method douchery….
A rose yo
Yeah BITCH! Roses!
Wow, you two really captioned this photo’s brains out.
Well done !
Bleeech!
“Lenny come on… Please don’t ask me to cough on stage…”
Yo, Jabba. What are the gloves for – cross training of pastries and raisinettes?
The gloves help her get a better grip on the ham-hock she eats for breakfast.
Ok I know models often go for ugly guys but you’re gonna tell me Heidi looked at that face and said “Oh yeah, I want that the rest of my life”???
I recall an interview with Heidi where she was asked about their first meeting.
Apparently it was what was below the face that got her attention.
the wallet?
the antique camera
The manicured, painted toenails?
The cock ?
Oh wait, sorry, I’m no good at this
hehehehe!
Pickle, you must watch this video clip from Mitchell and Webb!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1HLatYsE-78
the be-dazzled sandals?
The winner is commenter DeucePickle….Heidi claimed that Seal was wearing tight bike shorts… a garment that must have really flattered his meat package if it was the bait that snared a supermodel.
It was his singing. Women are turned on by their ears, and not their eyes. Hence the term “groupie”.
Overwhelming evidence that Milla Kunis has a thing for douchebags.
oh that means i have a chance .yay!
Doesn’t look gay.
God, Bill Paxton never ages!
Too many tacos!
“Yes, I’m sorry Ms. Williams. I AM gonna have to charge you the carry-on charge…”
As well as for extra seating…
Three notes earlier in the song, the guitarist has flowing straight hair. #surprisecolonoscopy
Is he hanging with Gerard?
He looks like an Earvin. Nothing magic about this.
Wow Ernest Borgnine didn’t waste any time in being reincarnated!
Extremely plain without make up and fancy dresses.
Everyone is.
not true. i live in the San Fernando section of Los Angeles and saw Jessica Alba at Whole Foods (about three years ago). Not a drop of make up (i made sure to get close enough to tell), hair in a pony tail, yoga pants and tshirt…she was stunning. some women just have naturally pretty faces. her skin was a little broken out, and she was STILL gorgeous. Don’t be jealous.
This woman is also a lot older than Alba, you can’t compare young to old. Your face gets harder to maintain at 35 than at 20- something.
While that may be true, the point of my post was that this Jen person is WRONG. Not “everyone” is plain without make up. I have an aunt who is older than Burke and looks AMAZING sans make up. She just has great aging genes and naturally has a gorgeous face. She was a model in her 20′s. My whole point was that there are in fact some women who look stunning minus make up and not “everyone” is plain without it. Even women not in their 20′s.
“Close enough to tell”? heheh I’m visualizing you standing right up next to her, staring. “Not touching, can’t get mad”…
please tell me that’s a fake tan and she’s not actually baked herself into a cheeto
Didn’t notice. I couldn’t get past the stuffed Koala on her head.
Ice(d Latte) Man
And then he does that thing where he bites his teeth down at Maverick…except this time there is a donut in his mouth.
Wants to be Johnny Depp so fucking bad. He was so close in the 80s and then Depp took the douchebag lead and never looked back.
Hey! Greico had TWO television series after Jump Street. What’s Depp done since then??
Depp? He’s become an ‘Honorary Native” for some role, has become Tim Burton’s concubine… and something associated with a ride at Disney Land or Disney World about pirates or something…
Not too sure. Anyway, whatever he’s been doing, he has in fact become the ‘Douche King’.
Before I read who this was I thought Birdman (the rapper) had made off with someone’s kid.
Too bad it isn’t him. Then you could caption this, “Up in the air, junior Birdman!”
*Photoboy throws out the Tony-bait, sits back and cracks a beer.*
Gunt!
I understand she’s a biker chick but is there a large enough bike for her?
Isn’t there some bike called a “hog”? That seems fitting.
I believe a Fat Boy or Wide Glide might be more suitable.
There’s a chin in there….a big one.
Is he the longest living HIV recipient out there? Is his HIV in remission or something?
How does this guy keep finding these events, much less paying the paparazzi to take his picture?
I think he’s dating someone who organizes these movie premieres. Like a professional event planner. It’s the only explanation I can come up with for these things.
This is Hollywood. He’s sucking dick.
I’m surprised THAT can be a professional athlete.
I agree, an abundance of muscle usually says desk-jockey to me.
Kevin’s mug shot for impersonating someone we ever cared about.
when kim k does this crap she comes across as radioactive waste, but put coco in the same pose and she’s just so cheerfully shameless you can’t help but kinda like her
Exactly!!!
Is she carrying the umbrella to keep the sun off of her because of her albino complexion or that she would sweat some of those pounds off?
Did she have a couple lower ribs removed, or is that a natural fabulous waistline?
“An action scene from Candyman IV is shot on the streets of New York City”
Just learned the bright light in the sky was named the “sun.” Learning IS fun.
Ms Tilly seems well nourished.
Because Hercules is the first guy I think of when somebody mentions Africa.
I know that face, Joe. The chick you just picked up in the club doesn’t look as good when you get her into regular lighting.
The silicon exhibit.
“My name’s Temple Grandin! And I can show you how to slaughter your cows more humanely and effectively! That’s Temple Grandin!”