The Crap We Missed – Friday 7.12.13

July 12th, 2013 // 318 Comments

So here’s your Friday edition of The Crap We Missed, that’s coming at you early, because Fish is hard at work stuffing LEGO references into a Pacific Rim review. “Man, you lazy fucks are cutting out early to go to a movie again!” you say? AHAHA– Sadly no. Someone decided to go see a late show without me last night, so I’ll be taking the afternoon to decopage a certain coffee mug — that may or may not have ‘World’s Greatest Tit Photo Editor’ stenciled on it — with pictures of a slight-framed, spiky-haired manchild wearing only a Captain America t-shirt and smashing it with a sledgehammer.

As for you guys, my loyal friends who I can always count on to tell me whose butts need how much of your pee, you get to enjoy the last thing Alec Baldwin will see before rage bursts from his chest in the form of red mist, Paris Hilton‘s utmost respect for the law, and Honey Boo Boo‘s parents signing copies of the book their family wrote because why not kick me when I’m down, universe, go ahead, I can’t get any lower.

I can still smell the butter on you, you bastard. I hope it was worth it,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Ireland Baldwin Licking Slater Trouts Abs Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Classy. Someone wants attention.

  2. Kathy Griffin Middle Finger Seminole Hard Rock Hotel & Casino
    Icehawg
    Commented on this photo:

    Just what everyone finds adorable : a bitter cranky cunt of an old lady. Yay.

  3. June Shannon Mike Thompson Honey Boo Boo Book Signing
    lawn
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s crazy. Like a fox.

  4. Bruce Springsteen Huge Pit Stains
    lawn
    Commented on this photo:

    I think I speak for everyone when I say, “eeeewwwwww.”

  5. Iggy Pop Shirtless Leathery Skin
    lawn
    Commented on this photo:

    Call him if you want to do a reboot of “Nightmare on Elm Street.”

  6. Erin Heatherton Nipples No Bra The Global Poverty Project 2013 Global Citizen Festival Press Conference
    Commented on this photo:

    “Um, there are like people who don’t eat and they’re not even pretty! So buy an ugly person food or plastic surgery. Thank you.

  7. Bruce Jenner Pissed Off Look
    lawn
    Commented on this photo:

    He was great in “Can’t Stop the Music.” Draw your own conclusions.

  8. Bruce Springsteen Huge Pit Stains
    Commented on this photo:

    Sweatin’ to the Oldies.

  9. Jonah Hill Neck Beard
    Commented on this photo:

    “You Jonah…Have the part of the Rhino in my next Spider-man movie!”
    “Wow! Thank you Mr. Maguire!

  10. Bruce Willis Checking Out Wife Emma Hemings Ass Red 2 Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Lex Luthor likes what he sees.

  11. Prince Charles Talking To Little Girl Coronation Festival Royal Preview
    Commented on this photo:

    Servant: What would you like for tomorrows Coronation Festival your Majesty?
    Prince Charles: How about a pretty little thing in a teddy!
    Servant: As you wish Sir.
    (Next day)
    Prince Charles: What the hell is this? Who the fuck are you?

  12. Scott Disick
    Commented on this photo:

    ” Make way for I am the douchebag messiah!”

  13. Taylor Hackford Fondling And Kissing Helen Mirren Red 2 Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Lucky bastard!

  14. Coco Cleavage Suspenders Old Modeling Photo Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Enough with the Pacific Rim posters already!

  15. Bruce Jenner Pissed Off Look
    sonofsamadams
    Commented on this photo:

    Rocky Dennis is gettin’ sassy!

  16. Ireland Baldwin Licking Slater Trouts Abs Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    I guarantee that a video of her licking his trouser trout already exists. I bet she’s so narcissistic that she masturbates to her own sex tape.

  17. June Shannon Mike Thompson Honey Boo Boo Book Signing
    Jenn
    Commented on this photo:

    That man behind him is helping him sign his name.

  18. Ke$ha Gold Tooth Fishnets Mesh Shirt BBC Studios
    Jenn
    Commented on this photo:

    That bitch is Borg, call Capt. Picard!

  19. June Shannon Mike Thompson Honey Boo Boo Book Signing
    Commented on this photo:

    The most embarrassing thing here is that man fucked that whale and is still allowed to show himself in public.

  20. Erin Heatherton Nipples No Bra The Global Poverty Project 2013 Global Citizen Festival Press Conference
    Commented on this photo:

    “Starving poor people don’t don’t wear bras, why should I?”

  21. Kathy Griffin Middle Finger Seminole Hard Rock Hotel & Casino
    Jenn
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m just glad she’s got on her 20 lbs of makeup.

  22. Bruce Springsteen Huge Pit Stains
    Commented on this photo:

    I can’t talk shit about this guy. I have nothing but respect for The Boss.

  23. Ke$ha Gold Tooth Fishnets Mesh Shirt BBC Studios
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s representing America so well overseas.

  24. Bruce Willis Checking Out Wife Emma Hemings Ass Red 2 Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    The escort service sent you a good one, Bruce.

  25. Sophie Simmons Cleavage Nipples Red 2 Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s Gene Simmons’ daughter? Not bad. Nice nips.

  26. Coco Cleavage Suspenders Old Modeling Photo Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh fuck yeah! I love this. She’s so sexy.

  27. Kate Upton Butt Yoga Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    Her tits are so spectacular, I never noticed she had such a sweet ass too.

  28. Taylor Hackford Fondling And Kissing Helen Mirren Red 2 Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Mirren is still so fuckable. I totally would.

  29. Catherine Zeta Jones Cleavage Red 2 Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s hot enough that I would consider putting up with her bi-polar disorder and cancerous vag.

  30. Selma Blair Pale Legs Short Shorts Carrying Son Arthur
    Commented on this photo:

    Stick with the dark hair, Selma. It looks a lot better on you.

  31. Erin Heatherton Nipples No Bra The Global Poverty Project 2013 Global Citizen Festival Press Conference
    Pine Table Fever
    Commented on this photo:

    ‘SEE IMPACT’? Is she there to promote a wrestling match between Stevie Wonder and Kings of Leon? Because, if so, I would donate and watch the shit out of that.

  32. Kathy Griffin Middle Finger Seminole Hard Rock Hotel & Casino
    Pine Table Fever
    Commented on this photo:

    Why is here hand made from Twiglets?

  33. Iggy Pop Shirtless Leathery Skin
    Commented on this photo:

    Freddy Kruger goes sweaterless.

  34. Scott Disick
    Pine Table Fever
    Commented on this photo:

    ‘…yeah, so I married into a family of Wookiees, blimps, and piss freaks but at least I still have my dignity, right? Right?’

  35. Taylor Hackford Fondling And Kissing Helen Mirren Red 2 Premiere
    Pine Table Fever
    Commented on this photo:

    Mirren is still hot as all hell, but the sound of those two screwing would be like someone crushing a bag of crisps.

  36. Maria Shriver Creepy Face Virgin Mary Tee Shirt
    Commented on this photo:

    Remember, you have to aim for the head to put ‘em down for good.

  37. Bruce Jenner Pissed Off Look
    Commented on this photo:

    “SSSNNNERRRRRKKKKK!!…(swallow)…

  38. Bruce Jenner Pissed Off Look
    Kris
    Commented on this photo:

    Why does that dyke always look pissed?

  39. Sophie Simmons Cleavage Nipples Red 2 Premiere
    Dangles the Wonder Mule
    Commented on this photo:

    PLEASE girl, gain titty weight but NO implants like your mom !
    You’ve got beautiful DSL’s, do not RUIN them ! ! ! ! ! ! !

  40. Prince Charles Talking To Little Girl Coronation Festival Royal Preview
    Dangles the Wonder Mule
    Commented on this photo:

    Gore, blimy, your wife is ugly Guvna !

  41. Scott Disick
    Dangles the Wonder Mule
    Commented on this photo:

    No, I’m retired from being a rent-able twink !

  42. Jonah Hill Neck Beard
    Commented on this photo:

    All he needs is a hat and his Chris Griffin costume will be complete.

  43. Iggy Pop Shirtless Leathery Skin
    CBGB
    Commented on this photo:

    There are several parts which compose the buckle of a belt. The frame, bar, prong, and chape are the names of the parts. The frame is the basis for which the buckle will hold the other pieces. The bar will allow the belt to flow through. The prong will go through one of the holes in the belt and allow the person wearing it to adjust the size. The chape is attached to the belt and holds the buckle in place. There’s no prong.
    Plus his skin.

  44. Kathy Griffin Middle Finger Seminole Hard Rock Hotel & Casino
    CBGB
    Commented on this photo:

    There are several parts which compose the buckle of a belt. The frame, bar, prong, and chape are the names of the parts. The frame is the basis for which the buckle will hold the other pieces. The bar will allow the belt to flow through. The prong will go through one of the holes in the belt and allow the person wearing it to adjust the size. The chape is attached to the belt and holds the buckle in place.
    There is a prong.
    Plus her skin.

  45. Ireland Baldwin Licking Slater Trouts Abs Instagram
    Aprell22
    Commented on this photo:

    Yuck!! No!!!

  46. Scott Disick
    Commented on this photo:

    “yea, really, he’s even douchee-er in person”

  47. Taylor Hackford Fondling And Kissing Helen Mirren Red 2 Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    eats some mango
    “i think it moved”

  48. Erin Heatherton Nipples No Bra The Global Poverty Project 2013 Global Citizen Festival Press Conference
    Commented on this photo:

    That is such an oddly random line-up for a concert. “Stevie Wonder! Kings of Leon! John Mayer! Los Lobos! The Singing Nun! The ‘My Baloney Has a First Name’ Kid!”

  49. June Shannon Mike Thompson Honey Boo Boo Book Signing
    sonofsamadams
    Commented on this photo:

    “Sir, don’t look now, but that thing next to you is on it’s fourth Big Gulp of moose urine.”

  50. Bruce Willis Checking Out Wife Emma Hemings Ass Red 2 Premiere
    sonofsamadams
    Commented on this photo:

    “Let me take a look. It sounds like someone is punching a bowl of warm mayonnaise every time you move your thighs.”

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