The Crap We Missed – Friday 5.17.13

May 17th, 2013 // 235 Comments

Welcome to Friday’s The Crap We Missed where we take a ton of paparazzi celebrity coverage and water it all down to the douchiest of canoes for you to point and laugh at. So today’s ego boosters include John Goodman cropdusting the loading zone at LAX, Justin Bieber and his boys on a Tic-Tac run like some straight up thugs, and Anthony Hopkins wearing snakeskin shoes to the American Idol finale, to which I was all like “WTF?!” until I remembered The Wolfman, so, nevermind this totally checks out.

Anyone want to tell Keith Richards that pole’s not actually Mick Jagger? Nah, forget it, he seems like he’s really enjoying himself,

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INF Daily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Jeremy Renner Walking Small Dog
    Commented on this photo:

    Fun fact…that’s not a dog. It’s his pet hamster.

  2. Amber Rose Fat Legs
    Commented on this photo:

    WHY DO YOU SHAVE YOUR HEAD? WHO TOLD YOU THAT WAS ATTRACTIVE??? Umm, sorry, just.. ah.. had to get that out of my system.

  3. Piper Perabo Nipples No Bra USA Nework Upfronts
    Commented on this photo:

    USA Upfronts… I see what they did there.

  4. Sofia Vergara Cleavage USA Nework Upfronts
    Commented on this photo:

    Pretty sure it would only take about 45 minutes for those eyebrows to grow together if she let it happen.

  5. Nicki Minaj Huge Butt Tight White Jeans American Idol Grand Finale
    Commented on this photo:

    Some famous people have body guards. Nicki Minaj has a spotter.

  6. Anthony Hopkins White Glasses Snakeskin Boots American Idol Grand Finale
    Commented on this photo:

    Dr. Lecter just hasn’t been the same since went Paleo.

  7. President Obama Eric Holder Janet Napolitano 32nd Annual National Peace Officers Memorial Service
    Commented on this photo:

    Thank you sir for reducing our deficit by over $800 billion since you took office.

  8. Justin Bieber Black Crew Gas Station
    Commented on this photo:

    Soon he’s going to start showing up in black face.

  9. Maria Fowler Nipples See Through Shirt
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t want to fuel any conspiracy theories or anything, but isn’t that the dead Boston Marathon bomber in the background?

  10. Nicki Minaj Huge Butt Tight White Jeans American Idol Grand Finale
    woah
    Commented on this photo:

    i’ve never believed ass-enhancement rumors ever. not even kim.

    but i’d be darned if these tires haven’t been inflated

  11. Ian Somerhalder Buying Hair Brush
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s an impressive strand of anal beads.

  12. Nicki Minaj Huge Butt Tight White Jeans American Idol Grand Finale
    Commented on this photo:

    Those pants left behind a suicide note in the drawer they came out of.

  13. Anthony Hopkins White Glasses Snakeskin Boots American Idol Grand Finale
    joe
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s lot of Evian Skin Cream and L’air Du Temps.

  14. Nicki Minaj Huge Butt Tight White Jeans American Idol Grand Finale
    alex
    Commented on this photo:

    I knew she was black. I knew it!

  15. Keith Richards Holding Onto Pole
    Methuselah
    Commented on this photo:

    This guy is a walking “Fuck You” to the medical sciences.

  16. Amber Rose Fat Legs
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Look how much milage this washed up stripper has gotten just from bedding Kanye.
    Can’t blame the Kardashian klan for wanting in on the action.

  17. Piper Perabo Nipples No Bra USA Nework Upfronts
    Commented on this photo:

    Why’s her nipple so shiny? Nipdazzling? Why hasn’t J Love done this?

  18. Keith Richards Holding Onto Pole
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    He doesn’t have to look pretty; that never was his thang.

  19. John Goodman Farting
    Commented on this photo:

    I guess when you’re that big, you just have to lift your leg to blow farts…

  20. Nicki Minaj Huge Butt Tight White Jeans American Idol Grand Finale
    Woone P. Tiggins
    Commented on this photo:

    “Mr. President, we must evacuate now. That thing could blow any minute!”

  21. President Obama Eric Holder Janet Napolitano 32nd Annual National Peace Officers Memorial Service
    Joe Blow
    Commented on this photo:

    “What, Me Worry?”

  22. Will Smith Jaden Smith After Earth Photocall Miami Science Museum
    Bill Clinton
    Commented on this photo:

    “Someone get this old nigga away from me!

  23. Keith Richards Holding Onto Pole
    Câlisse
    Commented on this photo:

    I can see the cocaine in his nostril..

  24. John Goodman Farting
    Anal Finger
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like John ate Roseanne and the rest of the cast.

  25. Maria Fowler Nipples See Through Shirt
    lamecommenter
    Commented on this photo:

    Fowler? I hardly know her!

  26. Will Smith Jaden Smith After Earth Photocall Miami Science Museum
    Bill Clinton
    Commented on this photo:

    “Somebody better tell this biotch to step off!”

  27. Rihanna Butt Tight Skirt Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m hoping for a “This is Sparta!” moment from one of the cameramen.

  28. Maria Fowler Nipples See Through Shirt
    Commented on this photo:

    For a brief moment I though Rhianna got some titties!

  29. Sofia Vergara Cleavage USA Nework Upfronts
    Commented on this photo:

    Her face looks like she had some work done.

  30. Keith Richards Holding Onto Pole
    Buster
    Commented on this photo:

    1.21 Gigawatts?!!

  31. Nicki Minaj Huge Butt Tight White Jeans American Idol Grand Finale
    Commented on this photo:

    She definitely had ass and breast implants. There are pictures of her before and after the surgeries. Most of her body is fake.

  32. Justin Bieber Black Crew Gas Station
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s so gangsta.

  33. Will Smith Jaden Smith After Earth Photocall Miami Science Museum
    Commented on this photo:

    That little boy is such a cunt.

  34. Christopher Lambert Kissing Gold Pen
    Commented on this photo:

    Neil Patrick Harris, circa 2025.

  35. Keith Richards Holding Onto Pole
    Commented on this photo:

    “I should try pole dancing. It has to be safer than climbing trees…”

  36. Piper Perabo Nipples No Bra USA Nework Upfronts
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s very beautiful. Always had a crush on this one.

  37. Keith Richards Holding Onto Pole
    Commented on this photo:

    Heroin seems to be good for you.

  38. Piper Perabo Nipples No Bra USA Nework Upfronts
    RAWZ
    Commented on this photo:

    Why does her head look like it’s shopped on? WHO ARE YOU?!

  39. Nicki Minaj Huge Butt Tight White Jeans American Idol Grand Finale
    jonesy
    Commented on this photo:

    This whole giant ass fad is wearing real thin.

  40. Rihanna Butt Tight Skirt Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Perfect launch for her new album! Now where is Chris?

  41. Nicki Minaj Huge Butt Tight White Jeans American Idol Grand Finale
    Commented on this photo:

    Better have a ‘backup cam’ installed in that thing.

  42. John Goodman Farting
    Commented on this photo:

    If I let this out right here… it’ll smell like taxi exhaust!

  43. Paris Hilton River Viiperi Make Out Gotha Club Cannes
    Commented on this photo:

    Jeeze.. Geta room, then lock yourselves in it. Forever.

  44. Christopher Lambert Kissing Gold Pen
    Commented on this photo:

    Sorry sir, you just can’t smoke that here.

  45. Laurence Fishburne
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s got the Queen La’Keefa look down pretty good.

  46. Ian Somerhalder Buying Hair Brush
    Ash
    Commented on this photo:

    Ian is not gay you weirdos. He’s just gorgeous.

  47. Nicki Minaj Huge Butt Tight White Jeans American Idol Grand Finale
    Jentilly
    Commented on this photo:

    If he removes his hand she’ll topple over

  48. Rihanna Butt Tight Skirt Instagram
    ruckus
    Commented on this photo:

    Now that she’s single, I wouldn’t mind taking a whack at her.

  49. Justin Bieber Black Crew Gas Station
    Supermarket Mom
    Commented on this photo:

    I think that they are there to by PowerBall tickets. Just like the rest of us.

  50. John Goodman Farting
    ruckus
    Commented on this photo:

    He looks like he is about to crash through a wall and scream, “OH YEAHHHHH!!!”

Leave A Comment