Welcome to Friday’s The Crap We Missed coming at you slightly early because it’s past noon and it’s hard to type and hold a whiskey bottle at the same time we couldn’t wait to bring you Charles Barkley in drag. No, not the bikini pic, you racist. Anyway, we’ve also got Slash‘s wife unleashing her banshee wail to call off the lumbering school of groupies as well as Michael Jordan playing “the back nine.” (Butt sex jokes. Holy cow!!)
Cheers,
- Photo Boy
[Ed. Note: We were going to post a bonus gallery of Shauna Sand but then we realized we already posted post her once today. So long story short, we almost tore a goddamn hole in the space-time continuum. Our bad. - SW]
Click Here To Start The Gallery
Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
She goes where she wants because no one wants to check her cunt for drugs.
The guy with the duct taped Hero action cam is engaging in the newest extreme sport, “B-list celebrity ear photography”
Well I googled him, turns out he’s some black guy.
Jeez he’s only been a main role in The Wire and Boardwalk Empire…. two of the highest rated most popular shows to date… how small-time he must be.
Ok, now can I notice he’s coloured?
This reminds me of why I got into the shopping mall glamour shot business. I mean, besides all the free hair spray I could carry.
The paparazzi were lucky enough to be ready to snap the instant Josh saw his first mirror since his haircut…
Say what you want, True Blood just doesn’t give the same jolt as the real thing.
Fish, there’s just one more positive thing about Snooki… HIV positive.
I’m not sure how big a jerk he is, but he’s getting 360 degree stink-eye like he’s eating the last powerbar on a life raft.
All that’s missing is Will Ferrell’s character from Step Brothers standing behind her with both his hands on her right shoulder.
He finally hit that last branch of the proverbial “Ugly Tree” on his way down.
Looks like the landing was kinda rough too.
Who?
He was the one from 21 Jump Street everyone expected to be a superstar. No shit.
“…and since this is as far as my mouth opens, I dumped Tommy Lee and started dating Slash”
Alternate joke: something about black microphones.
Now’s not the time for dick measuring, Stuart!
his physique is the very mirror of his comedic talent…flabby, bland and makes me want to look elsewhere.
I thought Wesley Snipes went to prison
So wait, is he encouraging cancer?
Well, it’s an honest mistake, the name of the benefit is Teenage Cancer Trust…..and he’s old and doesn’t know any better.
“If I’m going to phone-in my performances, why bother shaving? Or changing clothes for that matter?”
I guess Adonis DNA has a shelf life.
Ironically, Fergie has the same landing strip.
Why the hell is Starr Jones still in the news?!?
I don’t care how hard it is to clean velvet, I’ll buy a new fucking ottoman.
I never get tired of seeing street magicians pull things out of their mouths.
I don’t know the circumstances of her other childbirths, but I assume that they’re like Cesarians that start from the INSIDE, when at 40 weeks the child decides to start making its way out, chin first.
Between him and Kevin James both having careers in comedy, I do believe in miracles, I do!
It NOT for the Tramp Stamp she would be Do Able
why are lonely guys like you always being so picky and how robotic everyone has become. In every site there is always some idiot complaining about women’s tattoos? doesn’t anyone have a brain anymore or does everyone think the same.
Those with a brain have a problem with beautiful female skin being covered in shit that adds NOTHING to their attractiveness.
So, in your opinion are tattooed men just as disgusting?
If no, good news, YOU’RE A MISOGYNIST.
Vegas magician, circa 1998
Now that we have a billion, can we finally stop?
He was there for a photo shoot for the new warning labels on the cigarette packs.
Here he iiiiisss……the biggest douche in the universe!
Just caught his reflection in the car’s side-view mirror.
Instinctively started to chew the inside of his cheek in remorse.
Perfectly natural reaction.
I didn’t know you could tweet pictures from a Playskool camera
Yes yes, we’ve all seen Trey Parker in drag
Like a young Cameron Diaz. I still remember drooling after her in The Mask. Crap, I’m getting old.
Sorry, but Candice Swanepoel makes Cameron Diaz look like an ugly Cub Scout, all due respect to Cameron.
46 is 104 in crack years. He’s lived a full life.
“jinkies!” – my penis
Who’s Omar gonna fuck up this time?
The guy who played Omar and who plays Chalky White should never, ever appear like that in public. Ever.
You’re damn right I’m rolling these sleeves up, I didn’t shave my arms for nothing.
Serena Williams joke was taken. So I’ll go with..looks like he does all his “shooting” lefty.
This dude is still alive?
Based on the picture, it’s debatable.
I didn’t know 50 cent was nicki minaj’s stunt double.
Grooming: not a very particular skill.
“Man looks in the abyss, there’s nothing staring back at him. At that moment man finds his character. And that is what keeps him out of the abyss.” – sadly, he still hasn’t found his character.
He hasn’t even found the abyss yet.
Are his shoes on the wrong feet?
No, they’re just the wrong shoes.
Right now there’s a security guard in Florida yelling “Look out, he’s got a club!!” and drawing his gun.
“I’ll kick a fat bitch right in the coin purse!”
BRB, time to reshuffle the names in my celebrity death pool.
Izwazzzzajediiiiiheyyouulookzkindacute
If her babies are anything like their fathers, they going to be getting away from her as quickly as they can.
Finally, someone has the good sense to fence him in to keep him from interacting with the rest of the population.