The Crap We Missed – Friday 3.30.12

March 30th, 2012 // 398 Comments

Welcome to Friday’s The Crap We Missed coming at you slightly early because it’s past noon and it’s hard to type and hold a whiskey bottle at the same time we couldn’t wait to bring you Charles Barkley in drag. No, not the bikini pic, you racist. Anyway, we’ve also got Slash‘s wife unleashing her banshee wail to call off the lumbering school of groupies as well as Michael Jordan playing “the back nine.” (Butt sex jokes. Holy cow!!)

Cheers,

- Photo Boy

[Ed. Note: We were going to post a bonus gallery of Shauna Sand but then we realized we already posted post her once today. So long story short, we almost tore a goddamn hole in the space-time continuum. Our bad. - SW]

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Paris Hilton Cleavage Wonky Eye
    Piccio
    Commented on this photo:

    She goes where she wants because no one wants to check her cunt for drugs.

  2. Ronnie Wood
    Commented on this photo:

    The guy with the duct taped Hero action cam is engaging in the newest extreme sport, “B-list celebrity ear photography”

  3. Michael K. Williams
    White People
    Commented on this photo:

    Well I googled him, turns out he’s some black guy.

    • flatspottin'

      Jeez he’s only been a main role in The Wire and Boardwalk Empire…. two of the highest rated most popular shows to date… how small-time he must be.

  4. Michael K. Williams
    BlackAndWhiteMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    Ok, now can I notice he’s coloured?

  5. Candice Swanepoel Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    This reminds me of why I got into the shopping mall glamour shot business. I mean, besides all the free hair spray I could carry.

  6. Josh Duhamel Mohawk
    Commented on this photo:

    The paparazzi were lucky enough to be ready to snap the instant Josh saw his first mirror since his haircut…

  7. Charlie Sheen
    Commented on this photo:

    Say what you want, True Blood just doesn’t give the same jolt as the real thing.

  8. Snooki Cleavage Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    Fish, there’s just one more positive thing about Snooki… HIV positive.

  9. Kiefer Sutherland Eating Sandwich
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m not sure how big a jerk he is, but he’s getting 360 degree stink-eye like he’s eating the last powerbar on a life raft.

  10. Candice Swanepoel Cleavage
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    All that’s missing is Will Ferrell’s character from Step Brothers standing behind her with both his hands on her right shoulder.

  11. Charlie Sheen
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    He finally hit that last branch of the proverbial “Ugly Tree” on his way down.
    Looks like the landing was kinda rough too.

  12. Richard Grieco Leather Jacket Scruffy Beard
    Commented on this photo:

    Who?

  13. Slash Wife Perla Hudson Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    “…and since this is as far as my mouth opens, I dumped Tommy Lee and started dating Slash”

    Alternate joke: something about black microphones.

  14. Liam Neeson
    Commented on this photo:

    Now’s not the time for dick measuring, Stuart!

  15. Adam Sandler Shirtless Fat
    Commented on this photo:

    his physique is the very mirror of his comedic talent…flabby, bland and makes me want to look elsewhere.

  16. Michael K. Williams
    Commented on this photo:

    I thought Wesley Snipes went to prison

  17. Ronnie Wood
    Commented on this photo:

    So wait, is he encouraging cancer?

    • DeucePickle

      Well, it’s an honest mistake, the name of the benefit is Teenage Cancer Trust…..and he’s old and doesn’t know any better.

  18. Liam Neeson
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    “If I’m going to phone-in my performances, why bother shaving? Or changing clothes for that matter?”

  19. Charlie Sheen
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    I guess Adonis DNA has a shelf life.

  20. Josh Duhamel Mohawk
    Commented on this photo:

    Ironically, Fergie has the same landing strip.

  21. Charles Barkley Drag Womens Clothing Weight Watchers
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    Why the hell is Starr Jones still in the news?!?

  22. Karena Graham Lingerie
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t care how hard it is to clean velvet, I’ll buy a new fucking ottoman.

  23. Kiefer Sutherland Eating Sandwich
    Commented on this photo:

    I never get tired of seeing street magicians pull things out of their mouths.

  24. Reese Witherspoon Baby Bump
    AC
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t know the circumstances of her other childbirths, but I assume that they’re like Cesarians that start from the INSIDE, when at 40 weeks the child decides to start making its way out, chin first.

  25. Adam Sandler Shirtless Fat
    Commented on this photo:

    Between him and Kevin James both having careers in comedy, I do believe in miracles, I do!

  26. Christina Milian Butt Tight Pink Jeans
    Coyote
    Commented on this photo:

    It NOT for the Tramp Stamp she would be Do Able

    • Helloworld@fkkfkg.com

      why are lonely guys like you always being so picky and how robotic everyone has become. In every site there is always some idiot complaining about women’s tattoos? doesn’t anyone have a brain anymore or does everyone think the same.

      • Colostomy Bag

        Those with a brain have a problem with beautiful female skin being covered in shit that adds NOTHING to their attractiveness.

      • Haddo01

        So, in your opinion are tattooed men just as disgusting?
        If no, good news, YOU’RE A MISOGYNIST.

  27. Richard Grieco Leather Jacket Scruffy Beard
    Commented on this photo:

    Vegas magician, circa 1998

  28. Jon Gosselin Fat Sport Coat Jeans
    Commented on this photo:

    Now that we have a billion, can we finally stop?

  29. Ronnie Wood
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    He was there for a photo shoot for the new warning labels on the cigarette packs.

  30. Josh Duhamel Mohawk
    JPC
    Commented on this photo:

    Here he iiiiisss……the biggest douche in the universe!

  31. Josh Duhamel Mohawk
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    Just caught his reflection in the car’s side-view mirror.
    Instinctively started to chew the inside of his cheek in remorse.
    Perfectly natural reaction.

  32. Serena Williams Bikini Twitter
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    I didn’t know you could tweet pictures from a Playskool camera

  33. Paris Hilton Cleavage Wonky Eye
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    Yes yes, we’ve all seen Trey Parker in drag

  34. Candice Swanepoel Cleavage
    The Other White Meat
    Commented on this photo:

    Like a young Cameron Diaz. I still remember drooling after her in The Mask. Crap, I’m getting old.

  35. Charlie Sheen
    rockthrowinghipster
    Commented on this photo:

    46 is 104 in crack years. He’s lived a full life.

  36. Ashley Greene Legs Leather Miniskirt
    ohyeah
    Commented on this photo:

    “jinkies!” – my penis

  37. Michael K. Williams
    Commented on this photo:

    Who’s Omar gonna fuck up this time?

  38. Josh Duhamel Mohawk
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    You’re damn right I’m rolling these sleeves up, I didn’t shave my arms for nothing.

  39. Charles Barkley Drag Womens Clothing Weight Watchers
    rockthrowinghipster
    Commented on this photo:

    Serena Williams joke was taken. So I’ll go with..looks like he does all his “shooting” lefty.

  40. Richard Grieco Leather Jacket Scruffy Beard
    Commented on this photo:

    This dude is still alive?

  41. Serena Williams Bikini Twitter
    rockthrowinghipster
    Commented on this photo:

    I didn’t know 50 cent was nicki minaj’s stunt double.

  42. Liam Neeson
    joe
    Commented on this photo:

    Grooming: not a very particular skill.

  43. Charlie Sheen
    The Other White Meat
    Commented on this photo:

    “Man looks in the abyss, there’s nothing staring back at him. At that moment man finds his character. And that is what keeps him out of the abyss.” – sadly, he still hasn’t found his character.

  44. Michael K. Williams
    Commented on this photo:

    Are his shoes on the wrong feet?

  45. Michael Jordan Cigar Golf Club
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Right now there’s a security guard in Florida yelling “Look out, he’s got a club!!” and drawing his gun.

  46. Slash Wife Perla Hudson Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    “I’ll kick a fat bitch right in the coin purse!”

  47. Ronnie Wood
    joe
    Commented on this photo:

    BRB, time to reshuffle the names in my celebrity death pool.

  48. Liam Neeson
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Izwazzzzajediiiiiheyyouulookzkindacute

  49. Reese Witherspoon Baby Bump
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    If her babies are anything like their fathers, they going to be getting away from her as quickly as they can.

  50. Adam Sandler Shirtless Fat
    Commented on this photo:

    Finally, someone has the good sense to fence him in to keep him from interacting with the rest of the population.

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