The Crap We Missed – Friday 3.22.13

March 22nd, 2013 // 294 Comments

“Isn’t that funny? She calls these ‘breasts’ too!”

Welcome to Friday’s The Crap We Missed which serves to address the issue of vagina murder again, but only because I believe this woman’s could karate chop you to death. We’ve also got Drake Bell joining the illustrious club of men whose penises we’ve shamefully exploited, ditto for Serena Williams. Then there’s the most fearsome gang in Hollywood and finally, this pic JLo put on Twitter that would be totally ridiculous if she’d ever made a movie where the message was essentially, if a man beats you, you learn kickboxing, wait, then violently kill him.

Could you even imagine?

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Nicole Eggert Swimsuit Splash Practice
    Commented on this photo:

    Baywatch was a loooooong time ago.

  2. Jaden Smith Standing On Heat Lamp
    Commented on this photo:

    On kid is wearing a jacket that would have gotten him beaten at a Misfits show. One kid is wearing camouflage pants who would be crushed by any member of any military anywhere. One kid is wearing tights who would lose a fight with a ballerina. And one kid wearing Dale Earnhardt’s number and would be summarily executed at a NAACAR event. Love it.

  3. Nicole Eggert Swimsuit Splash Practice
    Commented on this photo:

    From Bay Watch to Whale Watch.

  4. Rumer Willis Adam West The Batman Product Line Launch at the Meltdown Comics
    Commented on this photo:

    She needs see through clothing to distract from that face.

  5. Rihanna Butt See Through Skirt
    Commented on this photo:

    Most of her music sounds like a fart to me.

  6. JoJo Levesque Cleavage Love Is Heroic Annual Spring Benefit For Unlikely Heroes
    Commented on this photo:

    She has been looking this good since she was about 12 or 13 years old! Now she’s legal and I wanna see those weapons of mass distraction.

  7. Elin Nordegren Twin Sister Josefin Nordegren
    Commented on this photo:

    There are TWO of them. So there really IS a God?

  8. John Mayer Stupid Hat Posing With Fan
    Commented on this photo:

    Sweet Jeezus…Katy Perry’s panties haven’t even cooled off yet and her snatch is still damp, and he’s already Tom Katting around? What a rancid dick!

  9. Heather Graham Cleavage Julie Bowen
    Commented on this photo:

    “Who has a more successful career than me? HER???”

  10. JoJo Levesque Cleavage Love Is Heroic Annual Spring Benefit For Unlikely Heroes
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s still around? Turning into the next Amanda Bynes in 3…2…1…

  11. Christian Bale Balding Weight Gain Amy Adams Untitled David O Russell Abscam Project
    Commented on this photo:

    WHY IS LOIS CHEATING ON CLARK WITH BRUCE??????

  12. Alessandra Ambrosio Butt Tight Jeans
    Commented on this photo:

    I want to stick my sausage in that lack of an ass

  13. Lana Del Rey Echo Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t know, or care, whether or not she can sing…unless she starts caterwauling while I’m banging her. In that event, I have things I can stuff in her mouth to muffle the noise.

  14. Jennifer Lopez Chris Brown Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    I used to like J-Lo, too. Cunt.

  15. Jaden Smith Standing On Heat Lamp
    Commented on this photo:

    This little piece of shit will be doing serious time before he’s 20.

  16. Nicole Eggert Swimsuit Splash Practice
    Commented on this photo:

    “Nicole, darling, you’re definitely looking better. But you’re really going to need to drop another pound…or two (ahem!) before you start posing for cheesecake pictures again.
    No, wait! I didn’t really mean cheesecake…wait…don’t go…ahh FUCK! There goes the show…”

  17. Rumer Willis Adam West The Batman Product Line Launch at the Meltdown Comics
    Commented on this photo:

    I’ve heard of May-December romances before, but up till now they had always been in the same century!

  18. Serena Williams Cleavage Sony Ericsson Open
    Commented on this photo:

    I fear that any sexual dalliance with this woman would, more than likely, be totally out of the question. But, HEY! One never knows…

  19. Rihanna Butt See Through Skirt
    Commented on this photo:

    Rihanna, how do you expect me to fantasize about fucking you when you do stupid poses like this? They’re unseemly! Or, so it seems.

  20. Doutzen Kroes Cut Off Jean Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    Look at that pretty belly button…a perfect spunk depository!

  21. Corinne Bishop Bikini Jamie Foxx Daughter
    Commented on this photo:

    To Jamie Foxx:
    I just thought you might want to know that, at this point, I have no desire to fuck your daughter. I hope that puts your mind at rest.
    PS: Do you suppose she swallows?

  22. Elin Nordegren Twin Sister Josefin Nordegren
    Don Draper's Dad
    Commented on this photo:

    Yeah, I can see how that would drive you to bang dirty cocktail waitresses in Subway parking lots. Totally.

  23. Lily Aldridge Cleavage Legs Tight Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    Sexy.

  24. Heather Graham Cleavage Julie Bowen
    Ripley's Believe It Or Not
    Commented on this photo:

    Which one convinced the other to become a Stepford Wife?

  25. Drake Bell Crotch Bulge Small Bathing Suit Splash Practice
    Ripley's Believe It Or Not
    Commented on this photo:

    Just remember he’s subject to SHRINKAGE. Just ask George.

  26. JoJo Levesque Cleavage Love Is Heroic Annual Spring Benefit For Unlikely Heroes
    Ripley's Believe It Or Not
    Commented on this photo:

    She stays that thin for the next 10 years, I’ll be POTUS by the same date.

  27. Lana Del Rey Echo Awards
    the wrecker
    Commented on this photo:

    Who? Exactly. Nobody.

  28. Rupert Murdock Wetsuit Wendi Murdock Bikini Boat
    the wrecker
    Commented on this photo:

    Congrats, Rupe. He’s winning.

  29. Christian Bale Balding Weight Gain Amy Adams Untitled David O Russell Abscam Project
    Ripley's Believe It Or Not
    Commented on this photo:

    From the thumbnail I thought Kelly Preston had finally hired some lawyer to divorce John over his homosexual dalliances.

  30. John Mayer Stupid Hat Posing With Fan
    Ripley's Believe It Or Not
    Commented on this photo:

    John pulled an Ahnold. He fucked a Mexican & Katy found out. At least his choice in Mexicans trumps the Sperminator’s.

  31. Lana Del Rey Echo Awards
    Ripley's Believe It Or Not
    Commented on this photo:

    The Germans have no recognisable humour, and have a guttural language straight out of a butcher’s shop. So it was with a straight face that they gave this talentless hack awards for carving up melodic harmonies.

  32. Lana Del Rey Echo Awards
    Former SS Soldier
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m suprised those awards don’t each have a little kink in them, about halfway up.

  33. Elin Nordegren Twin Sister Josefin Nordegren
    Commented on this photo:

    …and twins

  34. Jaden Smith Standing On Heat Lamp
    Pine Table Fever
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh cripes, look out! It’s the Douche Hand Gang!

  35. JoJo Levesque Cleavage Love Is Heroic Annual Spring Benefit For Unlikely Heroes
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Dear God, just in case you exist, more like this please.

    • Ripley's Believe It Or Not

      The only problem is, they don’t last. That’s what should be prayed for: May the ones we already have, avoid the Hippo route (taken, for example, by Eggert).

  36. Carnie Wilson Fat
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Che Guaverez wasn’t murdered…he went underground as a fat chick. He made one fatal mistake though…he kept the hat.

  37. Nicole Eggert Swimsuit Splash Practice
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    I keep hearing about how many sea lions there are in California.

  38. Rumer Willis Adam West The Batman Product Line Launch at the Meltdown Comics
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Adam West is going to reprise his role as Batman, while Rumer is going to play a new villain called ‘Unsightly’

  39. Doutzen Kroes Cut Off Jean Shorts
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    I can’t wait until spring when I’ll see this in my neighborhood.

    Who the fuck am I kidding.

  40. Lily Aldridge Cleavage Legs Tight Dress
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Someone should be asking her to go to a prom in 3.2,1…

  41. Heather Graham Cleavage Julie Bowen
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Gives new meaning to the phase: “What is wrong with this picture?”

  42. Corinne Bishop Bikini Jamie Foxx Daughter
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Best final 5 in a while.

  43. Rihanna Butt See Through Skirt
    Commented on this photo:

    The first row just got a contact high.

  44. Rihanna Butt See Through Skirt
    Ripley's Believe It Or Not
    Commented on this photo:

    Sixhead looks down on those with mere foreheads.

  45. JoJo Levesque Cleavage Love Is Heroic Annual Spring Benefit For Unlikely Heroes
    Skeeter
    Commented on this photo:

    I want to lick and pummel her butthole. She looks amazing.

  46. Serena Williams Cleavage Sony Ericsson Open
    Skeeter
    Commented on this photo:

    Serena just got word that the Chicago Bears offered her a contract to replace Brian Urlacher at LB.

  47. Jennifer Lopez Chris Brown Twitter
    fastbender
    Commented on this photo:

    Watch out J-lo. His left hand is making its way round your neck.

  48. Nicole Eggert Swimsuit Splash Practice
    fastbender
    Commented on this photo:

    Hopefully, this beached whale can be returned into the sea.

  49. Jennifer Lopez Chris Brown Twitter
    keijo
    Commented on this photo:

    Replace superficial logo with brazzers and that’s it

  50. Drake Bell Crotch Bulge Small Bathing Suit Splash Practice
    Commented on this photo:

    I assumed it was the Canadian Jewish rapper Drake who is supposed to murder Crazy Girl’s vagina…but looking at this guy’s package, maybe she meant either. I would go for the rapper, personally. With a wrapper of course.

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