The Crap We Missed – Friday 3.14.14

March 14th, 2014 // 356 Comments

Welcome to Friday’s The Crap We Missed which, thanks to Comcast taking a shit on my face, is coming at you from Starbucks — a place I thought was just a nice spot to get an overprice cup of sugar, but turns out is actually Satan’s asshole. Who knew? In a moment, I’ll get this nice ENTIRE FUCKING FAMILY WHO FOR SOME REASON IS IN STARBUCKS ON A FRIDAY AFTERNOON and speaking at max volume in Spanish right beside me to translate this for our ESL readers, but first I need to collect myself with this Elton John pic. This should put me in a calm, meditative state.

*waits, inhales deeply* Nope, still gonna steam burn everyone in this place to death. *leaps onto table, points green straw* BARISTA, EN GUARD!!

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame/Flynet, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Katy Perry Butt Yoga Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    she’s confessed to wearing butt enhancing padding. So no surprise here.

  2. Elton John Blowing Microphone
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    Crazy….but that’s how it goes….Millions of people living as fooooes….

  3. Joanna Krupa Topless Sideboob Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Dis how chicken get me erect.

  4. Jared Leto Hair On Terry Richardson Head
    Ken
    Commented on this photo:

    What’s the matter, Terry? Cat got your thumbs?

  5. Paz de la Huerta Drunk Smoking Cigarette Chateau Marmont
    Commented on this photo:

    Heroin: It does a body good.

  6. Ben Affleck Grey Hair Scruffy Beard Fat Gut
    kevolution
    Commented on this photo:

    Fatman

  7. Chord Overstreet On Darren Criss Back Glee Set
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    Great, now I’m getting flashbacks of that time I was raped by a young Ron Howard. Thanks, Photoboy!

  8. Paz de la Huerta Drunk Smoking Cigarette Chateau Marmont
    tobi
    Commented on this photo:

    Steven Tyler heading to Bruce Jenner’s latest party

  9. Hilary Duff Tight Red Heans
    Commented on this photo:

    Dufftastic…Duffman approves.

  10. Paz de la Huerta Drunk Smoking Cigarette Chateau Marmont
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like a 140 pounds of chewed gum wrapped in a 70′s waterbed bedspread.

  11. Kate Major DUI Mugshot
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    Well at least she has something in common to bond with her stepdaughter over now.

  12. Nicki Minaj Butt Twerk Leather Moschino Shoot Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    is the leather diaper supposed to look sexy….

  13. Nicki Minaj Butt Twerk Leather Moschino Shoot Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Nope.

  14. Chloe Dykstra Legs Posing On Motorcycle Cleavage Captain America The Winter Soldier Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d rather she was riding my hog.

    G’night, everybody!

  15. Burt Young Lisa Scuteri Neck Rocky Broadway Opening Night
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    You bangin’ my sister, Paulie???

  16. Paz de la Huerta Drunk Smoking Cigarette Chateau Marmont
    ultra
    Commented on this photo:

    That, that dude looks like a lady

  17. Kylie Jenner Scott Disick Lord Disick Slippers DASH Store Opening
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    I bet this movie ends with the drug lord getting shot up, as his coke empire crumbles.

  18. Katy Perry Butt Yoga Pants
    Inner Retard
    Commented on this photo:

    For the sake of everyone standing behind her let’s hope her farts aren’t as awesome as her tits.

  19. Paz de la Huerta Drunk Smoking Cigarette Chateau Marmont
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    The Chateau Marmont, where rooms are $800/night, not including minibar, room service, or needle exchange

  20. Joanna Krupa Topless Sideboob Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Dis how chicken got green card.

  21. Paz de la Huerta Drunk Smoking Cigarette Chateau Marmont
    Commented on this photo:

    is she dying of salmonella?

  22. Chord Overstreet On Darren Criss Back Glee Set
    Inner Retard
    Commented on this photo:

    - Told you not to stand so close behind me!
    - Told you not to stop suddenly before me!
    - So… we’re gay.
    - Yep.

  23. Kate Upton Cleavage Express Runway Show
    Inner Retard
    Commented on this photo:

    The one talent she has and covers it up.

  24. Ben Affleck Grey Hair Scruffy Beard Fat Gut
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    Bro…why is my car scratched? You scratch it, bro?

  25. Jared Leto Hair On Terry Richardson Head
    Commented on this photo:

    2 pedos walk into a room. I got nothing more.

  26. Alexander Skarsgard Hoodie Gym Shorts Bag Sandals
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    That bag contains today’s batch of phone numbers.

  27. Jared Leto Hair On Terry Richardson Head
    Inner Retard
    Commented on this photo:

    From the looks of it the one man who can freak out even Terry Richardson.

  28. Kylie Jenner Scott Disick Lord Disick Slippers DASH Store Opening
    Commented on this photo:

    This dude is such a fucking flamer it is not funny.

  29. Wesley Snipes Rocky Broadway Opening Night
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey, everyone remember that Rocky movie I was in where I fought Rocky in the future?

  30. Paz de la Huerta Drunk Smoking Cigarette Chateau Marmont
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t know how old she is, but she should have called it quits at 27.

  31. Kate Upton Cleavage Express Runway Show
    Commented on this photo:

    Would fuck her so hard if she’d just have that restraining order lifted.

  32. Tim Robbins Scruffy Gray Beard A Perfect Day Photocall
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    Rapey Claus is comin’ to town…

  33. Ben Affleck Grey Hair Scruffy Beard Fat Gut
    Commented on this photo:

    “You can keep the tip if you promise to quit playing Batman”

  34. Chloe Dykstra Legs Posing On Motorcycle Cleavage Captain America The Winter Soldier Premiere
    Rico Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    Google “chloe dykstra tits’ …. you’re welcome.

  35. Isla Fisher Cleavage Pregnant Boobs Belly
    Commented on this photo:

    Well played Photoboy, well played. ha ha ha

  36. Alexander Skarsgard Hoodie Gym Shorts Bag Sandals
    Commented on this photo:

    Yummy

  37. Joanna Krupa Topless Sideboob Instagram
    dude
    Commented on this photo:

    This looks like it should be a perfume ad.

    Created by Krupa. Approved by Glanville.
    Bok

  38. Kylie Jenner Scott Disick Lord Disick Slippers DASH Store Opening
    Commented on this photo:

    How is that guy still alive? Seriously, nobody is going to take a shot at him? I’m — speechless.

  39. Coco String Bikini Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Jesus Christ, she photoshopped about 50 pounds off her body.

  40. Paz de la Huerta Drunk Smoking Cigarette Chateau Marmont
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s a man, baby!

  41. Alessandra Ambrosio Side Boob launch Ale By Alessandra Planet Blue
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    The Beebz is 2 seconds away from squeezing that boob.

  42. Tim Robbins Scruffy Gray Beard A Perfect Day Photocall
    Inner Retard
    Commented on this photo:

    He sure got grey quick but it works for him.

  43. Chord Overstreet On Darren Criss Back Glee Set
    Commented on this photo:

    Who? And who?

  44. Chord Overstreet On Darren Criss Back Glee Set
    Commented on this photo:

    Chord Overstreet? Sounds like the name of someone who would date Ireland Baldwin or climbed out of Sarah Palin’s vagina.

  45. Jared Leto Hair On Terry Richardson Head
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    John Travolta is jealous of Terry for 9 different reasons.

  46. Coco String Bikini Instagram
    Inner Retard
    Commented on this photo:

    This woman looks like a reverse-photoshop. When you exaggerate body parts for laughs.

  47. Tim Robbins Scruffy Gray Beard A Perfect Day Photocall
    Commented on this photo:

    Here we see actor Tim Robbins model the newest in the line of Superficial golfing apparel, this 100% lambs wool sweater comes in a range of tasteful colours and is, of course, embroidered with the world-famous Superficial logo.

  48. Elton John Blowing Microphone
    Lady Blah Blah
    Commented on this photo:

    guess he was just ‘born this way’

  49. Chord Overstreet On Darren Criss Back Glee Set
    jerry
    Commented on this photo:

    Umm… you guys do know that’s how AIDS is spread…

  50. Alessandra Ambrosio Side Boob launch Ale By Alessandra Planet Blue
    Commented on this photo:

    “Haha, can you believe how fat these mannequins are?”

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