The Crap We Missed – Friday 2.3.12

February 3rd, 2012 // 362 Comments

Awesome. Now I can’t stop trying to remember the warthog’s name from The Lion King.

Welcome to Friday’s The Crap We Missed where we see that Whitney Houston‘s back at the top of her game, Russell Brands‘s nipples will feed Beverly Hills’ homeless (as well as sex them all into salvation) and for Christ’s sake will someone give Michael Cera a van and a map to the Second Mile Headquarters already?

Something tells me today’s Final Five anonymously found its way into Wilmer Valderrama ‘s inbox,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

superficial

  1. Arnold Schwarzenegger
    Commented on this photo:

    “Dis is my im-ee-ta-shun of Charles Bronson drinking brake fluid.”

  2. Kim Kardashian Butt Tight Dress
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    Phish: please contact TMZ, CelebSlam, Drunken Stepfather, Amy Grindhouse, TooFab, Bleacher Report, Just Jared, BuzzFeed, Hollywood Tune, DListed, Pop Sugar, IDLYINW. The Fab Life, etc. etc. etc. (I imagine all of you editors madly texting ant Tweeting each other all day long) and put a 6-month moratorium on all things Kardashian. Not a pic, not a word. Like they don’t even exist.
    Since they’re fame-whores, who knows what lengths they’ll go to to get attention?
    When the only people who report on them are People, EW and The National Enquirer, what lengths will thy go to to get a headline?
    And STILL not get one.
    Who’s with me?
    (besides, the ‘getting peed on’ and ‘Sasquatch/Wookie’ jokes in the Comments section are getting a little tired.

  3. Michael Cera Perv Moustache
    Raoul
    Commented on this photo:

    I love watching this guy paint ‘happy little trees’!

  4. Kim Kardashian Butt Tight Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    Some poor fool has an orange mess in his pants now

  5. Russell Brand See Through Shirt Nipples
    Hes awesome
    Commented on this photo:

    “Give me all of your money so I can be photographed giving it to this hobo” Russell said to his writer Barry.

  6. Daniel Radcliffe Mario Lopez Extra
    Raoul
    Commented on this photo:

    The exact moment Radcliffe realizes how far he’s fallen that he’s standing next to Mario Lopez.

  7. Carl Weathers
    Commented on this photo:

    Got damn, he’s pretty effing hot for 64 years old! I say, got DAMN!

    • Agreed. I only wish that I could look like this at 64. Hell…I wish that I could look like this NOW. (Yes…I’d turn black if it meant looking this good.)

  8. Daniel Radcliffe Mario Lopez Extra
    Ole
    Commented on this photo:

    The Mexican and Pinata

  9. Gillian Zinser Bikini
    Raoul
    Commented on this photo:

    Omigod! My shadow! Six more weeks of not eating!

  10. Carl Weathers
    Raoul
    Commented on this photo:

    Carl Weathers: BAMF.

  11. Name (Visible)

    Who is that?

  12. Demi Lovato Tyler Shields
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t think Selena envisioned being reincarnated as an angsty, mutilating teenager

  13. Michael Cera Perv Moustache
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    Tryin’ to get that cool, retro 70′s pornstar look going on, seeing as there are 2 Linda Lovelace bio-pics in production.
    Problem is, the Brown Bag under his arm has donuts in it, not booze, and his other hand’s on his cellphone’s speed-dial to his Mom in Brampton, Ontario should he come across any “shady” characters he comes across.

  14. Michael Cera Perv Moustache
    Commented on this photo:

    I swear I bought an 1/8th from this guy back in high school.

  15. Demi Lovato Tyler Shields
    Douche Chills
    Commented on this photo:

    Yeah, no.

  16. Minka Kelly Butt Tight Jeans
    Raoul
    Commented on this photo:

    Minka Kelly, hot on the trail of the Mystery Machine. “Those meddling kids won’t mess with my plans this time!”

  17. Deena Cortese Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s not really clowned up for a change. I like it. I’d demolish that ass.

  18. Demi Lovato Tyler Shields
    Commented on this photo:

    Model for the Rolling Stones urinal?

  19. Katharine McPhee Picking Up Dog Poop
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    You cut off the shoes, the ass AND the puppy…..WTF?

  20. Daniel Radcliffe Mario Lopez Extra
    Commented on this photo:

    Tony and Bernardo josh around backstage before the knife-fight.

  21. Kim Kardashian Butt Tight Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    JLH is gonna be PISSED that someone’s stealing her fashion/engineering secrets.

  22. Woody Harrelson Scarf Knit Hat
    Commented on this photo:

    Woody Harrelson narrowly sneaks through the crowd by making them think that he’s really Wesley Snipes.

  23. Russell Brand See Through Shirt Nipples
    Commented on this photo:

    Here’s a good rule of thumb for wearing scarves and knit hats: if the rest of your outfit includes a winter coat, go ahead, because it’s fucking cold outside. If it only consists of tight jeans and a t-shirt made of pantyhose, reconsider.

  24. Carl Weathers
    Commented on this photo:

    “Is that the craft services table? I’ve got a per deim to save.” (I’m so happy Arrested Development is coming back.)

  25. Kim Kardashian Butt Tight Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    Kim K. attributes her natural skin tone to nightly moisturizing with Cheeze-Whiz.

  26. Kim Kardashian Butt Tight Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s just nice that she doesn’t use Minwax like Christina.

  27. Kathy Lee Gifford
    Commented on this photo:

    I would love to see a picture of her when she first wakes up and then spend the rest of my life regretting having seen it.

  28. Kathy Lee Gifford
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hey, Regis…you’ll never get another piece of THIS ass!”

  29. Carl Weathers
    doogleberg
    Commented on this photo:

    Apollo Creed has aged well. Good job, dude.

  30. Deena Cortese Cleavage
    anon
    Commented on this photo:

    No no no guys, it’s Pumbaa!! Kind of like Wookiee, but in Africa, not Kashyyyk.

  31. Deena Cortese Cleavage
    dontlooknow
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s been said before, but bears repeating: “If you put a pig in an ugly dress, it’s still a pig. In an ugly dress.”

  32. Daniel Radcliffe Mario Lopez Extra
    George P Burdell
    Commented on this photo:

    Trying to be a real boy Pinocchio enrolls in Bayside High School and meets Slater.

  33. Gillian Zinser Bikini
    George P Burdell
    Commented on this photo:

    My shadow is so fat.

  34. Arnold Schwarzenegger
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    You can’t even trust bottled Indian water.

  35. Michael Cera Perv Moustache
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hey, everybody. Let’s give it up and give a round of applause for Clyde Crashcup…!!!”

  36. Arnold Schwarzenegger
    dontlooknow
    Commented on this photo:

    “I don’t LIKE Indian food!”

  37. Carl Weathers
    Commented on this photo:

    Damn, stew does a body good.

  38. Whitney Houston
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s tried to smoke her ring on 5 different occasions.

  39. Jack Ketch

    Yeah, who is it ? She (it) looks like 16 miles of bad road.

  40. Katharine McPhee Picking Up Dog Poop
    Commented on this photo:

    Here we see a very attractive young starlet wiping her dog’s ass. It begs the question, “Who is the master and who is the pet?”

  41. Daniel Radcliffe Mario Lopez Extra
    dontlooknow
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s taking douche lessons from Mario and it looks like he’s becoming a A student.

  42. Cameron Diaz
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Keeping the sun at your back is always a good tactic.

  43. Russell Brand See Through Shirt Nipples
    Commented on this photo:

    I was so sorry to hear about Russell Brand’s passing. Oh, wait…he didn’t? Ahhhh FUCK! Never mind!

  44. Russell Brand See Through Shirt Nipples
    Commented on this photo:

    Flavor Flav remains unimpressed.

    • Jill

      Was just going to ask when they starting hanging out. Imagine if those two were in a room with Snooki and JWoww. Can a super strength hybrid of AIDS cause a room to explode?

  45. Daniel Radcliffe Mario Lopez Extra
    Commented on this photo:

    “OK, Mario, I’m smiling just like you are…NOW do I look macho?”

  46. Carl Weathers
    Commented on this photo:

    You know, just two adults getting a stew on.

  47. Gillian Zinser Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    “According to the angle of my shadow it’s 2:00!”

  48. Michael Cera Perv Moustache
    Jill
    Commented on this photo:

    Note to Micahel Cers: No one knows its PBR if you keep it in a paper bag.

  49. Michael Cera Perv Moustache
    Commented on this photo:

    Anyone remember this guy from High School? The wimpy, awkward kid who discovered he could grow a mustache, and so does thinking it will make him cool…but instead looks like a wimpy, awkward kid with a sad mustache?

    Michael Cera looks like he just got done raping that kid.

    • dontkillthemessenger

      Just because he was taking pictures at the playground doesn’t mean he did anything illegal.

  50. Cameron Diaz
    Jill
    Commented on this photo:

    she looks like she just left an audition for a remake of “Blade Runner” and was told they were going to stick with Rutger Houer.

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