The Crap We Missed – Friday 2.3.12

February 3rd, 2012 // 362 Comments

Awesome. Now I can’t stop trying to remember the warthog’s name from The Lion King.

Welcome to Friday’s The Crap We Missed where we see that Whitney Houston‘s back at the top of her game, Russell Brands‘s nipples will feed Beverly Hills’ homeless (as well as sex them all into salvation) and for Christ’s sake will someone give Michael Cera a van and a map to the Second Mile Headquarters already?

Something tells me today’s Final Five anonymously found its way into Wilmer Valderrama ‘s inbox,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

superficial

  1. JungleRed

    Pumba

  2. Kim Kardashian Butt Tight Dress
    Shae
    Commented on this photo:

    Holy self-tanner fail.

  3. Arnold Schwarzenegger
    Frank Burns
    Commented on this photo:

    So that is where Bill the Cat has been hiding.

  4. Whitney Houston
    Contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    And IIIIIIIII-eeee-IIIIIIIIII will always love crack.

  5. Kim Kardashian Butt Tight Dress
    Frank Burns
    Commented on this photo:

    Those are the biggest Valtrex tablets I’ve ever seen.

  6. Russell Brand See Through Shirt Nipples
    Frank Burns
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice to see him back in his natural environment.

  7. Deena Cortese Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    Pumba!

  8. Kathy Lee Gifford
    taz
    Commented on this photo:

    nothing more beautiful than a smooth face and lizard neck…..he says sarcastically

  9. Michael Cera Perv Moustache
    Contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    If he’s not playing the shorter, more frail, smaller dicked version of John Holmes in the Deep Throat movie, he needs to shave that shit off before he gets hauled in for molesting children whether he did or not.

  10. Carl Weathers
    Frank Burns
    Commented on this photo:

    Always liked this guy, seems to comport himself well. No slams from me.

  11. Arnold Schwarzenegger
    Commented on this photo:

    “What da heil is dis? I asked for my bottle of latin housekeeper pee!”

  12. Russell Brand See Through Shirt Nipples
    taz
    Commented on this photo:

    Why do all the douche bags wear these knit hats….is it so they can identify each other??

  13. Daniel Radcliffe Mario Lopez Extra
    Contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    The motorcycle jacket does not make you a badass. It just makes Mario Lopez uncomfortable in his pants.

  14. Kim Kardashian Butt Tight Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    You’d think her stylist would have been a bit more subtle about hiding the 1-ton tensile strength cables keeping that outfit together.

  15. Demi Lovato Tyler Shields
    Contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    Cliche “I really want to suck your cock” photo #248. But it’s working.

  16. Russell Brand See Through Shirt Nipples
    Commented on this photo:

    Dude, first rule of handling your shit is not getting photographed with your dealer.

  17. Kim Kardashian Butt Tight Dress
    Lita
    Commented on this photo:

    Too much self-tanner. Kim, even I know you’re supposed to wash your hands after you use self-tanner so your hands don’t turn orange too.

  18. Daniel Radcliffe Mario Lopez Extra
    Commented on this photo:

    They might as well label this a Sandusky scene right here.

  19. Deena Cortese Cleavage
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Isn’t “Jersey Couture” an oxymoron?

  20. Kathy Lee Gifford
    Lita
    Commented on this photo:

    Joan Rivers is actually starting to look good.

  21. Daniel Radcliffe Mario Lopez Extra
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    Mario flashes his best fake smile to hide how uncomfortable he is with Radcliffe’s constant talk about big bushes.

  22. Deena Cortese Cleavage
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    When a Wal-Mart greeter gets the “Red Carpet Treatment”, it brings a tear to my eye.
    Go, lower-class America, go! You deserve your moment!
    *sniff!*

  23. Deena Cortese Cleavage
    phffft...
    Commented on this photo:

    Jersey Couture… now that’s an oxymoron if I’ve ever heard one. pass the Oxygen please.

  24. Gillian Zinser Bikini
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    So, somebody decorated their surfboard make it look like a woman?

  25. Demi Lovato Tyler Shields
    Commented on this photo:

    So *that’s* what my cumshot looks like at 1/1000 shutter speed.

  26. Deena Cortese Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    ahh Pumba! yes yes yes!

  27. Deena Cortese Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    “Jersey Couture”? I guess that’s like “English cuisine.”

  28. Deena Cortese Cleavage
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m not a fan of gigantic asses or guts or thighs, but I have to say, she doesn’t look half bad here. I mean, I didn’t know who this was until I read the caption.

  29. Arnold Schwarzenegger
    pretty vacant
    Commented on this photo:

    dickwad!

  30. Arnold Schwarzenegger
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    ‘Vindaloo’ you say? I can see through time!

  31. Demi Lovato Tyler Shields
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    How does this hack get all these famous chicks to participate in his crap photoshoots? I assume that cocaine shoots out of his dick?

  32. Whitney Houston
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    What a rude, unflattering shot of her in a natural moment!
    Now, picture her with her mouth closed and smiling, and you’ve got…?

  33. Kathy Lee Gifford
    Commented on this photo:

    Kathy, Kathy! Do the face like that one time you accidentally walked in on Regis naked!

  34. Rack 'em

    Beer goggles.

  35. Deena Cortese Cleavage
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    When you say, “O.K., we need to find a new slam beast to put on the Jersey Shore, and Snooki’s contract says we’re not allowed to pick anyone who’s prettier or classier than her,” this is what you get.

  36. Arnold Schwarzenegger
    M
    Commented on this photo:

    He won’t be back . . .

  37. mrsmass

    i almost didn’t recognize her without her orange skin and 25 pounds of make up.

  38. Woody Harrelson Scarf Knit Hat
    M
    Commented on this photo:

    Still channeling his character from 2010 I see.

  39. Woody Harrelson Scarf Knit Hat
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    Sucking a piece of free-range, grain-fed, organic, fair-trade almond from his teeth. Somewhere in Australia, though, a sheep is shivering.

  40. Woody Harrelson Scarf Knit Hat
    M
    Commented on this photo:

    ummm – make that “2012″ – damned broken keyboards . . .

  41. Kathy Lee Gifford
    M
    Commented on this photo:

    I think she just looked at the picture of KK before hers.

  42. Michael Cera Perv Moustache
    Commented on this photo:

    Wasn’t there a joke a few months back about a Mexican eighth-grader that could be recycled here?

  43. V

    look at this nasty chola thinking she’s desirable.

  44. Deena Cortese Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    Whatever you do, don’t touch her. Her bodily fluids may be just as caustic as her face.

  45. Woody Harrelson Scarf Knit Hat
    Mhm
    Commented on this photo:

    I like them french fried potaters.

  46. Whitney Houston
    Ellen
    Commented on this photo:

    nah, she’s just a nasty filthy junkie.

  47. Deena Cortese Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    This photo lends further credence to the old adage, “Giant tits alone do not a hottie make.” I think Aristotle said it.

  48. Whitney Houston
    pretty vacant
    Commented on this photo:

    yes whitney, your collar is a live rabid racoon and when its done choking you it will rip you apart and eat you alive.

  49. Michael Cera Perv Moustache
    Mickey01232000
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow, a broad with a mustache!!

  50. Michael Cera Perv Moustache
    Fjord Landerflanging
    Commented on this photo:

    The first Hipster rules them all.

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