The Crap We Missed – Friday 2.14.14

February 14th, 2014 // 404 Comments

Welcome to a very special bullshit holiday edition of The Crap We Missed, brought to you by Karissa Shannon‘s giant butt, because what better way to commemorate a completely fake and meaningless thing intentionally engineered for the dual purpose of alleviating men of their money and leaving women with a dull sense of dissatisfaction about their lives.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

- Photo Boy

P.S. Ladies, if you’re looking for last-minute ideas for your special guy, Ryan Seacrest has you covered.

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: AKM-GSI, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Karissa Shannon Huge Butt Lingerie
    Commented on this photo:

    Elephant-ass-isis?

  2. Rumer Willis Nipples Cameltoe Butt Sheer Dress
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    Why ?

  3. Joseph Gordon Levitt Eating Burger Next To Guy Shitting Himself Laker Game
    Lord Helmet
    Commented on this photo:

    Who goes to a Lakers game in a suit?

  4. Karrueche Tran Side Boob No Bra Tank Top Butt Tight Jeans
    Commented on this photo:

    Glad she carries around that medical bag…

  5. Joseph Gordon Levitt Eating Burger Next To Guy Shitting Himself Laker Game
    George P. Burdell
    Commented on this photo:

    “Oh, Mr. Gordon-Levitt, I’m looking at you… You wore purple so you could hide. I don’t blame you – you’re a tramp! Ooh! That was right where you wanted it! Ooh Mr. Gordon-Levitt, you’re a little monkey woman you know that? You’re a little monkey woman… You’re lean and you’re mean and you’re not too far between either I bet, are ya?

    “Oh, that was out load? I meant rally socks!”

  6. Stedman Graham The Morning Show
    MarketingMike
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s so used to Oprah’s handcuffs, he’s unintentionally
    offering his wrists to the interviewer. How sad…

  7. Ryan Seacrest Shoving Whole Fist In Mouth Jeffrey Katzenberg Laker Game
    Commented on this photo:

    I would have expected a discussion around how best to keep the American people stupid and complacent would happen in a more sinister location.

  8. Karrueche Tran Side Boob No Bra Tank Top Butt Tight Jeans
    MarketingMike
    Commented on this photo:

    If I order two of these, can I get a discount?

  9. Ashton Kutcher Blue Belt Jiu Jitsu
    crb
    Commented on this photo:

    Congratulations. Now Renzo Gracie will spit in your face.

  10. Karissa Shannon Huge Butt Lingerie
    Commented on this photo:

    Disgusting

  11. Rumer Willis Nipples Cameltoe Butt Sheer Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow, that’s an awful lot of people to take pictures nobody cares about.

  12. Rumer Willis Nipples Cameltoe Butt Sheer Dress
    Chaz
    Commented on this photo:

    Rumer has it*.

    *Camel toe

  13. Lizzie Cundy Nipple Slip Winters Tale UK Premiere
    MarketingMike
    Commented on this photo:

    Nipple Sighting!

  14. Kelly Brook Butt Yoga Pants David McIntosh
    George P. Burdell
    Commented on this photo:

    She better marry him soon or she will be too wide to continue making money in her choosen profession.

  15. Ashton Kutcher Blue Belt Jiu Jitsu
    Commented on this photo:

    Isn’t that cute. He has a blue belt in Korean ballet.

  16. Karrueche Tran Side Boob No Bra Tank Top Butt Tight Jeans
    George P. Burdell
    Commented on this photo:

    While the cats away the mouse will play.

  17. Bruce Jenner Creepy Face Shaved Adams Apple LAX
    crb
    Commented on this photo:

    “Guess how many dicks I’ve got in these boxes. Meh, don’t bother…”

  18. Pink Doing Yoga Kate Beckinsale Yoga Fundraiser Benefiting The Margie Petersen Breast Center
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks far more threatening than Kutcher, even with his blue belt.

    • Satan's Right Hand

      Blue belt is right after White belt. I would put money on PINK to beat the daylights out of him

  19. Candice Swanepoel Butt Tight Dress Bottletop Collaboration Launch
    Lord Helmet
    Commented on this photo:

    ‘Launching her Bottletop’ – sounds so dirty. Love it!

  20. Demi Lovato Fat Legs Tights Plaid Miniskirt
    George P. Burdell
    Commented on this photo:

    She always found that giving herself a little cut during the show helped her focus.

  21. Mariah Carey Cleavage Empire State Building Appearance
    Commented on this photo:

    JESUS, SHE’S HUGE! Oh wait, that’s just a model of the Empire State Building.

  22. Demi Lovato Fat Legs Tights Plaid Miniskirt
    Commented on this photo:

    Thunder… thunder….. thunder thighs power activate….

  23. Mariah Carey Cleavage Empire State Building Appearance
    Commented on this photo:

    Suddenly, the bright flashbulbs of the paparazzi sent Mariah into a frenzy. She began to climb the building, clutching a scared Nick Cannon in her hand.

  24. Naked Twerking Girls Buck 22 Achy Breaky 2 Feat Billy Ray Cyrus
    Commented on this photo:

    Not going to lie they could twerk those asses on me anytime they want…

  25. Aubrey ODay Naked Playboy Spread Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Yeah, like she’s got any pride or shame… your modesty ship has already sailed, toots.

  26. Mariah Carey Cleavage Empire State Building Appearance
    crb
    Commented on this photo:

    -DO NOT care if it’s before Labor Day; Mariah Carey wearing white is just a little bit fu**ing disingenuous; -rich, even.

  27. Tobey Maguire Manboobs Gut Police Escort
    Commented on this photo:

    How many different liquids does one guy need to carry?

  28. JJ Abrams Derpface Winters Tale UK Premiere
    crb
    Commented on this photo:

    “HEEY LAYDEEEE!!!”

  29. Taylor Swift Cance Rehearsal Clothes
    Commented on this photo:

    Hm. Not sure I’m sold on the new hair. As if that would matter.

  30. Kelly Brook Butt Yoga Pants David McIntosh
    Commented on this photo:

    you whore!…

  31. Karissa Shannon Huge Butt Lingerie
    Commented on this photo:

    The S&M man…

  32. Benedict Cumberbatch Flight Attendants BAFTA New York Presents In Conversation With Benedict Cumberbatch
    crb
    Commented on this photo:

    “Check ‘em out. These are the kinds of bitches that show up for the Sherlock! meetups. Yup, FML!”

  33. Leonardo DiCaprio Awful Wax Figure Madame Tussauds
    Dr. Badtouch, child proctologist
    Commented on this photo:

    Glbert Grape II: Gilbert’s new Adventures in “Looking for MAWWMAWW”

  34. Kate Mara Cleavage Boob Window House Of Cards Season 2 Special Screening
    crb
    Commented on this photo:

    What dafuq happened to the hot chick from “Shooter”?

    • buzz

      She got pissed off in Lindsey Lohan proportions because everyone, even craft services, kept referring to her as Hot Ginger and dyed her hair to become an average blonde chick.

  35. Kelly Brook Butt Yoga Pants David McIntosh
    Dr. Badtouch, child proctologist
    Commented on this photo:

    Pfft. All she has to do to get me to marry her away from that tool is utter the three magic words: I love anal.

  36. Prince Charles Prince William Giant Stuffed Tiger Poaching Exhibition Illegal Wildlife Trade Conference
    crb
    Commented on this photo:

    “We meet again, Amy Chua! I see the SAS has finally stopped you stealing Mummy’s parenting tips, eh old boy?”

  37. Karrueche Tran Side Boob No Bra Tank Top Butt Tight Jeans
    Dr. Badtouch, child proctologist
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice carabiner, bitch. No one’s told you it’s not 1997 anymore?

  38. Mickey Rourke Lunch With Young Hipsters
    Commented on this photo:

    He can’t do any worse than Dr. Drew.

  39. Mickey Rourke Lunch With Young Hipsters
    yourmom
    Commented on this photo:

    “One of these things is not like the others… one of these things just doesn’t belong….”

  40. Naked Twerking Girls Buck 22 Achy Breaky 2 Feat Billy Ray Cyrus
    crb
    Commented on this photo:

    Criticize the song all you want, but taint-stickers and spray-painted nekkit alien ladybutts will forgive an awful lot of sins.

    Happy V-Day,

    Lucifer.

  41. JJ Abrams Derpface Winters Tale UK Premiere
    joe
    Commented on this photo:

    See the lens flare in his left eye? Explains a lot.

  42. Mark Wahlberg The Gambler Set
    joe
    Commented on this photo:

    Jon Hamm he ain’t.

  43. Prince Charles Prince William Giant Stuffed Tiger Poaching Exhibition Illegal Wildlife Trade Conference
    Dr. Badtouch, child proctologist
    Commented on this photo:

    Something something tiger, Africa, homosexuality, booze, something something.

  44. Karissa Shannon Huge Butt Lingerie
    crb
    Commented on this photo:

    Photoshop?

    Left cheek appears 50% bigger than right one…

  45. Ashton Kutcher Blue Belt Jiu Jitsu
    Commented on this photo:

    That must be an incredibly popular Jujitsu school. People must be lining up for the opportunity to kick him in the face.

  46. Pink Doing Yoga Kate Beckinsale Yoga Fundraiser Benefiting The Margie Petersen Breast Center
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s the FUCKIN Kate Beckinsale Yoga Fundraiser .
    POW-POW!

  47. Gerald McRaney House Of Cards Season 2 Special Screening
    joe
    Commented on this photo:

    How many guns do you think he’s carrying?

  48. Pink Doing Yoga Kate Beckinsale Yoga Fundraiser Benefiting The Margie Petersen Breast Center
    Commented on this photo:

    pink is the most irritating and bad-looking ‘woman’ on the planet, in every way. Other than that it’s quite attractive.

  49. Karissa Shannon Huge Butt Lingerie
    Gin&Tonic
    Commented on this photo:

    Remember when she was really hot? Yeah, me neither. Always was a butterface and now she’s like the poor man’s coco whose whole career was based around being the poor mans anna nicole smith.

  50. Prince Charles Prince William Giant Stuffed Tiger Poaching Exhibition Illegal Wildlife Trade Conference
    Dr. Badtouch, child proctologist
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh! I got it…
    And then the tiger catches Charles’ eye, bringing him back to a time long ago in the jungles of Africa with his male companion, Richard. A time they shared a love that he can never speak of. A time of youthful indiscretion he so desperately wishes he could return to. A time of aggressive man on man action before the advent of those damn cameras that are everywhere today. A time of love. And then, just as quickly, he snaps back to the present, realizing he still has more hair than his son, the future king of England.

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