Welcome to Friday’s The Crap We Missed and let me just say we are ending the week titty strong. Maybe to make up for the criminal penisfication of Miranda Kerr, or maybe because my sharply trained eyes and hardened heart would never fail to bring you this perplexing combo. While you struggle with the weirdest boner ever, please also enjoy Nick Nolte just getting better and better with age, ditto for Bill Paxton, as well as Chevy Chase, because he looks like he’s still doing alrig–AHHH!
For the love of God, could someone please make it illegal for John Travolta & Olivia Newton John to be in the same room?
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“No, really. I only want a sip.”
It’s Flabber time!
If Self-Loathing Had a Douchey Grandpa
“Quack.”
I know it’s hard to tell from pictures, but I am having a really hard time imagining that either of these people have any redeeming qualities.
A failed attempt to draw attention from her breasts. I guess she doesn’t really understand men.
She has no intention of drawing attention away from them, she has them very intentionally on display.
Catered by Pete Schweddy.
Hey, Fuck you Dan Harmon. I win.
Ever ready to delight his fans when someone wants him to pee on them he aims to please. Just give him a challenge like doing it sitting down.
A Micheal Jackson nose
I’m a peaceful man, but goddam I’d love to punch the shit out of this guy.
She’s beautiful.
My first tought was just how many guys has she serviced that evening?
I think she’s straight edge now, right?
Berlin salutes Madonna!
It’s good to see that she’s still alive.
She’s pretty hot.
Tick tick tick. One hour to get the flowers in a vase or they all DIE!!!
Nick: “I crippled a guy. Rock on!”
They’re called Yoga pants. Not sausage casing pants.
This is the sort of pairing you get when gay marriage is illegal.
Nice tits.
Evidently Rosie isn’t giving him what he wants. Quick, give him some cake or a new hobby before he makes another lame action movie out of frustration.
That’s not Aubrey O’Day. What the fuck did she do to her face? She actually looks good.
I don’t think she’s been on this site in months. I guess that’s how long the deorangeification process takes.
You know how they say stuff like, “Oh, he’s the Garth Brooks of France” or “she’s the Meryl Streep of South America?” Well, I think this must be “the Jennifer Lopez of Fat Asia.”
She’s alright.
Head like a Hefty bag
Ironically, there is $1 million in hundred dollar bills in that bag, but somehow he’s got on some homeless lady’s pink pants.
Never thought we’d consider Charlie the responsible one.
Holy shit…Brittany Murphy is back from the dead!
Yeah, and she has a new movie out too!
Nuts need to start showing some vadge, because I’m losing interest.
These idiots make that face and those hand gestures every day at least once. I’ve never made them ever.
You’re doing it wrong!!! Look up he skirt or down the cleavage. Not up the nose.
Those pants are rather unseamly.
Fish, I congratulate you on a second straight day of an awesome “Final Five”
Of course we know that Monday we’ll be right back to Shauna Sands or Aubrey O’Day or some other silicone nightmare.
But bask in the glory until then…
Cut! Eyebrows!
He looks like he thinks people are constantly following him.
Well at least someone is eating on the set.
“Can you see where I stomped the bitch?”
DOWN, Boy! Down! It’s just a banana, I tell you. Just a banana…
Sad that her two kids have to look at the floor to look up to her.
At least the pearls look real.
“Omigod…MOM…DAD…I thought you were dead!” — Lady Gaga
He must hold some record for making the greatest number of dreadful movies in the shortest period of time.
Are they for real?
“Magnum, fetch me the pool boy!”
What the fuck happened to Mitch Comstein?
He’s starting to look more and more like the pile of shit he turned into in “Weird Science” every day
I conclude from that jacket that he changes his own motor oil…then wallows in it.
Unaware that he didn’t need to look like one to attend.