Welcome to Friday’s The Crap We Missed and let me just say we are ending the week titty strong. Maybe to make up for the criminal penisfication of Miranda Kerr, or maybe because my sharply trained eyes and hardened heart would never fail to bring you this perplexing combo. While you struggle with the weirdest boner ever, please also enjoy Nick Nolte just getting better and better with age, ditto for Bill Paxton, as well as Chevy Chase, because he looks like he’s still doing alrig–AHHH!
For the love of God, could someone please make it illegal for John Travolta & Olivia Newton John to be in the same room?
- Photo Boy
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Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
The Clothes Show? I’d rather watch cheese or snow.
It’s official… my job sucks.
T
Paxton, Pullman, what’s the difference?
Somewhere, Ben is realizing that her story about having a disease that keeps her jaw from opening that wide is just a WEB OF LIES!
It’s a disease that’s acquired at marriage.
Didn’t you know that when a wedding ring slides onto a woman’s finger, her jaw locks shut( except when she’s yelling at you or gorging on food), her sex drive drops precipitously and and sweatpants becomes her uniform? It’s all because of the ring.
One Ring to fool them all, One Ring to blind them,
One Ring to string them along and in the darkness bind them.
Tom, I bow before your brilliance! If the Superficial ever has a Top Comments of the Year segment this should be in the top 10.
There aren’t too many actresses who are comfortable having their picture taken with a plug of Red Man in their mouth.
And yes, ladies, rides are indeed free.
Beetin’ wimminz is hard werk, y’all.
It’s like I can smell the vomit, cigarette smoke, and airplane bathroom through my laptop.
His Little Trees air freshener necklace must need replacing.
I was thinking the same thing. There was a time in my life where I drank until I puked..but even then, I tried not to get it on myself, and when I did, I changed my shirt.
and yet… following preggers Amber Rose he looks pretty hot.
Soviet Nuts taste like chicken.
I’m not sure if the photo needs color correction, or just her face.
“Check out how veiny my leg is…it’s like one of kim kardashian’s boobs’
In the bag: his career.
I didn’t know Chris Kattan was allergic to bees.
Poor guy. Sure, everyone thought about her. But did anyone even take a second to think about his cut-up knuckles?!?!
Will claim credit for coming up with “The Hobbit” first in 3…2…
Bridgette! Sweet & Sexy!
One of the few women in Hef’s life that actually has real tits.
And isn’t such a brain-dead idiot. She seems almost like a normal human being.
How dare you! You take that back!
Your game is over man!!
if she ever gets pregnant, she’s really going to look like shit.
She is pregnant. That is still no excuse for that hideous ass though.
^ ^ fail
good lord, did you take a dump on your s key?
I think you might need to reconsider your handle.
I guess when you get to a certain age, you just get them to embroider a ‘youthful’ cameltoe motif onto your yoga pants…
Yo Johnny P! :D
I thought it was sweat, embroidery is definitely more disturbing, but less gross.
Cameltoe? Hell, I thought it was a side-by-side shot of the camel’s two front feet.
This year has been the worst of my life, and I just want to say I love all of you guys for making me laugh at things like cameltoes.
*HUGS the gang*
*sneaks hand towards cran’s ass*
hahahahahahaha :D
M-i-c….k-e-y….. is lactaaaaating…
Mickey Rourke!
Mickey Rourke!
Forever, let us hold his titties high!
*Grabs sharpie and starts tracing her cameltoe area*
Cheaper than buying the latest trends.
You know your career is on the skids when you have to practice for a Michael Bay audition.
Proof that even scrunched up tits can’t fix all ugly….yikes!
Looks like at least one photographer has learned the “jingle your keys” technique for dealing with models.
“Some Dudes Marry Ducks.
Get Over It”
“Some Ducks Wear People Clothes.
Get Over It”
I’m came here to pick up some chinese food and kick some ass… and I already got my chinese food.
He called Peter Jackson halfway through and criticized the writing, gave the cast backhanded compliments, then left in a huff twenty minutes before it ended.
His high exaltedness, the Great Jabba the Hutt, has decreed that you are to be terminated immediately.
He’s got exactly 48 minutes to get to the market and back. And the mob and FBI are both on his tail…
Pulling a Bukowski.
Here’s hoping Nick’s the designated driver
“Um Candice…there’s a man, Deacon Jones, who is here and he’s refusing to leave until you let him eat your ass. He’s already knocked out two of our security guards.”
Never trust a kleptomaniac with big sleeves.
ESPECIALLY at a vodka-sponsored event.
The poster chidren for the afterschool special on emotional immaturity.
Beam me up Scotty, no sign of intelligent life here. Is that “evil eye” sign supposed to be cool ? What IS that, anyways. People doing it look fucking dumb. Years ago it meant you were screwing around on your wife. WTF does it mean now ?
it’s the sign fucktards make cuz they’re , you know, fucktards.
It’s the Hogans, so let’s not rule out that it still means screwing around on wives.
Definitely looking clean and sober here.
someone said “vajazzle that pussy”…and this happened
And we shall call you “Dances with Adderall”
He’s meeting Mickey Rourke at the airport…..
Seen here practicing her “I’m straight” look
Suddenly Sodom and Gomorrah seem like Salt Lake City and Omaha…
If I were her, I would literally never stop admiring my own ass. Dear lord…
God bless you, Photoboy. God bless you.
Someone called dibs in the “Miami Vice” wardrobe castaway bin…
“Oh, Cate. Why don’t you have a penis?”
Poor hair has been bleached well beyond the line of insanity.
Wow that old dude has some really big tits!
I thought it was White Snooki.
Scarecrow got ‘roids instead of a brain, raged on Diddy and took his pants.
Hammer Time!
You take two wax dummys, heat them with a blow torch, put them in a wind tunnel….
Bad lighting is not your friend, girl.
“She’s a two-face.”
Plus all the make up, she looks so much more beautiful with less!