The Crap We Missed – Friday 10.7.11

October 7th, 2011 // 614 Comments

Welcome to Friday’s The Crap We Missed featuring me talking about absolutely none of the photos in it because, on a serious note, huge thanks to Photo Boy for filling in while I dealt with some family shit. He earned his vacation next week, so you folks are stuck with little ol’ me, and I hope you like posts where I break down crying and pissing myself because I don’t know how to work the coffeemaker. Also, huge thanks to everyone for the well wishes and being badass readers. I don’t know what I’d do without you, except I do and it’s work retail. *holds up cardboard sign reading, “WILL BLOWJAY YOU TO READ MY DICK JOKES”*

In the meantime, due to the shit-crazery of this week, Most Important People will not be seen this weekend, so I understand if a couple of you have to commit suicide tomorrow. It’s honestly the only reasonable reaction here.

Enjoy the highly unorthodox Final Five that I’m not gonna lie is totally for me,

- The Superficial

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photos: Bauer-Griffin, Fame, Flynet, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Robin Williams Glenn Close
    farting old man's wife
    Commented on this photo:

    Are you really a Genie?? Please, I need those three wishes NOW dammit!!!

  2. Maggie Gyllenhaal Cowboy Boots
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey, if you don’t want your feet to hurt, don’t wear fucking cowboy boots.

  3. Mario Lopez Daughter Gia
    farting old man's wife
    Commented on this photo:

    You know he is thinking ” little fatty needs to lose some weight!!”

  4. Kim Kardashian Butt Kourtney Kardashian
    BlackAndWhiteMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    The Kardashian’s managers seem to know what they’re doing. My money’s on them.

  5. Kim Kardashian Butt Kourtney Kardashian
    farting old man's wife
    Commented on this photo:

    That can’t be Kim her ass isn’t big enough! That person looks almost normal!!

  6. Paris Hilton
    Commented on this photo:

    Doug Reinhardt really let himself go.

  7. Pippa Middleton
    farting old man's wife
    Commented on this photo:

    In case some of you guys reading this don’t know it, that is one variation of the “LOOK” and by that face, I would run if I got that look!!!

  8. Kayte Walsh Kelsey Grammer Make Out Boss
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s gotten some pretty hot women over the years. Especially considering that he’s looked like this since he was 16 years old.

  9. Snoop Dogg Hoodie
    BlackAndWhiteMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    Rock, Paper, Fo’ shizzors

  10. Kayte Walsh Kelsey Grammer Make Out Boss
    farting old man's wife
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks like that kiss is painful!! Gees I wonder why!

  11. Paris Hilton
    joys of roughing
    Commented on this photo:

    Paris is missing the big picture here. That’s the next installment to “Searching for a bff”. Curbing this guy’bodily functions would be an adventure in itself not to mentioned her chi chi friends reactions to him. How could this not work?

  12. Rihanna
    farting old man's wife
    Commented on this photo:

    HEY she isn’t touching her cootch!!!! YEAH!!!!!

  13. Brooke Shields
    farting old man's wife
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like her happy pills are working overtime!!

  14. Robin Williams Glenn Close
    Commented on this photo:

    If the shot just included Nick Nolte, you’d have three of my favorit Hollywood drunks.

  15. Martha Stewart Baby Stroller
    BlackAndWhiteMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    First, catch your baby…

  16. Hilary Duff Tight Pants Butt
    farting old man's wife
    Commented on this photo:

    She has pregnant ass!

  17. Arnold Schwarzenegger
    farting old man's wife
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s my umbrella, WAA WAAAAAA give it back or I’m telling!!!

  18. Theresa

    Britney looks hot…

  19. Mel B Cleavage Nickelodeon Kids Choice Awards
    farting old man's wife
    Commented on this photo:

    Honey mommy wants you to behave now! Mommy had to blow a lot of people to get here!!

  20. Martha Stewart Baby Stroller
    farting old man's wife
    Commented on this photo:

    Fuck I hated being a mother now I hafta be a grandmother!!!

  21. Keanu Reeves Motorcycle Helmet
    Commented on this photo:

    It takes a special talent to look incredibly uncool while riding a Norton. Well done Neo.

  22. Martha Stewart Baby Stroller
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    “Six more months and you’ll be able to work for your Grammy”

  23. Paris Hilton
    adolf hitler
    Commented on this photo:

    that dude looks like an egg

  24. Britney Spears
    your mom
    Commented on this photo:

    She really has no idea where she’s at… OH! The pretty lights!!

  25. Mario Lopez Daughter Gia
    joys of roughing
    Commented on this photo:

    Must he indoctrinate this kid in his sleeve-less habits?

  26. Clarence Beeks

    She is just not pretty anymore.

  27. Josh Groban Shirtless
    Commented on this photo:

    Having groupie sex with Josh Groban is somewhere in the realm of hooking up with Moby or Edgar Winter. Either way, you wouldn’t want to be photographed the next day.

  28. Amy Lee
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m glad to see a new face on this site

  29. Pippa Middleton
    Commented on this photo:

    Yeah Pippa, I don’t get it either.

  30. Hilary Duff Tight Pants Butt
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    She works so hard on that ass but nobody really cares.

  31. Brooke Shields
    Commented on this photo:

    “And this little jewish fellow is my agent, and…”

  32. Amy Lee
    EmmaWatson's Vagina
    Commented on this photo:

    oh man, she must have some serious constipation going on there. quick get her off stage before she explodes.

  33. Amy Lee
    Commented on this photo:

    I didn’t know that Fran Drescher could sing.

  34. Amy Lee
    Commented on this photo:

    Morpheous would like his costume back.

  35. Rihanna
    King
    Commented on this photo:

    Not… gonna… make… it….

    eeeyehhh..

    not again.

  36. Amy Lee
    bone 'er
    Commented on this photo:

    nice smile!

  37. Paris Hilton
    karen
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s always nice when one of our male commenters meets a celebrity in real life.

  38. Pippa Middleton
    Problem?
    Commented on this photo:

    This bitch STILL?

  39. Snoop Dogg Hoodie
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    All that chronic is starting to make him look like Droop Dogg.

  40. Enrique Iglesias Fan Make Out Butt Grab
    Venom
    Commented on this photo:

    Attack of the Killer Whale.

  41. Rachel Bilson
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    Why would you attach somebody else’s ponytail to the back of your head?

  42. Paris Hilton
    maeby
    Commented on this photo:

    Is that a La Quinta or what?

  43. Paris Hilton
    Venom
    Commented on this photo:

    Not to be outdone by Enrique Iglesias, Paris found her own super fat fan to make out with.

  44. Keanu Reeves Motorcycle Helmet
    maeby
    Commented on this photo:

    what the….are those TEETH?

  45. Clive Owen El Hormiguero
    Venom
    Commented on this photo:

    She pulled down her pants and like boom, there was just this huge bush there.

  46. Katie Holmes Tom Cruise Hold Hands
    Venom
    Commented on this photo:

    Hold my hand tight and I will deposit another million dollars in your account tomorrow.

  47. Sharon Stone Nipples
    Venom
    Commented on this photo:

    Jennifer Aniston’s trend is catching on nicely I see.

  48. Amy Lee
    marie
    Commented on this photo:

    kinda hot!

  49. Keanu Reeves Motorcycle Helmet
    Venom
    Commented on this photo:

    He smiled? Fuck, the world is going to end now for sure.

  50. Kim Kardashian Butt Kourtney Kardashian
    Venom
    Commented on this photo:

    Something something lipstick on a pig….

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