The Crap We Missed – Friday 10.7.11

October 7th, 2011 // 614 Comments

Welcome to Friday’s The Crap We Missed featuring me talking about absolutely none of the photos in it because, on a serious note, huge thanks to Photo Boy for filling in while I dealt with some family shit. He earned his vacation next week, so you folks are stuck with little ol’ me, and I hope you like posts where I break down crying and pissing myself because I don’t know how to work the coffeemaker. Also, huge thanks to everyone for the well wishes and being badass readers. I don’t know what I’d do without you, except I do and it’s work retail. *holds up cardboard sign reading, “WILL BLOWJAY YOU TO READ MY DICK JOKES”*

In the meantime, due to the shit-crazery of this week, Most Important People will not be seen this weekend, so I understand if a couple of you have to commit suicide tomorrow. It’s honestly the only reasonable reaction here.

Enjoy the highly unorthodox Final Five that I’m not gonna lie is totally for me,

- The Superficial

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photos: Bauer-Griffin, Fame, Flynet, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Robin Williams Glenn Close
    Colin
    Commented on this photo:

    Wait, so if Robin Williams is on the left, who’s playing Mrs. Doubtfire?

  2. Sharon Stone Nipples
    Any Guy
    Commented on this photo:

    Chelsea Handler needs a bra… oh wait.

  3. Arnold Schwarzenegger
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    I guess it’s true; you can’t go home again.

  4. Mel B Cleavage Nickelodeon Kids Choice Awards
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Is that the Murphy spawn? Is that the little bundle of child support payment delight?

  5. Demi Lovato
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    I like it :-o

  6. Josh Groban Shirtless
    edamame
    Commented on this photo:

    Dude, if you are going to manscape, go to a professional. Those stupid lines across your chest look like a 90s fade gone wrong.

    • Um, as you can prolly tell, he wasn’t posing for this… he doesn’t claim to have the best bod and rarely has shirtless pics. So if he wants to have a looksee out the window and isn’t expecting photos, dang it, let the poor man have a looksee without rude comments.

  7. Snoop Dogg Hoodie
    Any Guy
    Commented on this photo:

    “lemme get two, lemme get two nicks dawg”

  8. Snoop Dogg Hoodie
    edamame
    Commented on this photo:

    All day I dream about smokin’. Then, I make it happen.

  9. Kim Kardashian Butt Kourtney Kardashian
    Any Guy
    Commented on this photo:

    The Flying Nun wants that washed in battery acid before her costume is returned. k thanks.

  10. Martha Stewart Baby Stroller
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    To be left in the will as prime beneficiary the daughter had to give up her first born child.

  11. Kim Kardashian Butt Kourtney Kardashian
    edamame
    Commented on this photo:

    White after Labor Day…..and in a size 16? Ballsy!

  12. Paris Hilton
    TomFrank
    Commented on this photo:

    “Well, at least you’re not black. ‘Cause that’s just gross.”

  13. Kim Kardashian Butt Kourtney Kardashian
    edamame
    Commented on this photo:

    Glinda and Elphaba go shopping.

  14. Lady Gaga Side Boob
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    Cruella probably only needs like, maybe 25 Dalmatians for that outfit.

  15. Britney Spears
    Commented on this photo:

    First thing I wanna do is get me some real French Fries y’all.

  16. Amy Lee
    Trep
    Commented on this photo:

    I thought it was gonna be Dinklage.

  17. Jack Black
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s drunk and she’s in her pajamas. Must be a good movie.

  18. Sharon Stone Nipples
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s no Jennifer Aniston.

  19. Pippa Middleton
    edamame
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m “royalty adjacent”, but I’ll still cut a bitch.

  20. Lady Gaga Side Boob
    Anon
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s not cool and outlandish if you need a seeing eye human to help you walk from the door to your fucking car.

  21. Amy Lee
    Colin
    Commented on this photo:

    I always feel like I’ve accomplished something when I reach the end of a Final Five, seeing as how I think this is only the second time it’s happened.

  22. Lady Gaga Side Boob
    Commented on this photo:

    What do you get when you cross a Labrador retriever with a retard?

  23. Katie Holmes Tom Cruise Hold Hands
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    “That’s right Katie, just keep holding my hand like it says in the contract and there won’t be any trouble.”

  24. Josh Groban Shirtless
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    Young Woody Allen and his Jersey Shore weekend.

  25. Kim Kardashian Butt Kourtney Kardashian
    yoyoblack
    Commented on this photo:

    i think you need to be quite a bit thinner to pull off the annie hall thing

  26. Rachel Bilson
    edamame
    Commented on this photo:

    80s meets Grunge, but not in a good way.

  27. Kim Kardashian Butt Kourtney Kardashian
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    Someone tell her that paper doesn’t have funnies in it.

  28. Rachel Bilson
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow. There’s a bag that won’t get stolen from the baggage claim.

  29. Amy Lee
    Colin
    Commented on this photo:

    For a brief, horrifying moment, I thought this was Kristen Stewart. And then I realized it couldn’t be, since she’s making a facial expression.

  30. Kayte Walsh Kelsey Grammer Make Out Boss
    edamame
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow, she matched her hair to his skin tone. Isn’t that lovely?

  31. Maggie Gyllenhaal Cowboy Boots
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    Sometimes when you see a homeless person you think, is that Maggie Gyllenhaal? This time it is.

  32. Jack Black
    Commented on this photo:

    “How was I supposed to know it was a black-tie affair. The bastard said to come as you are.”

  33. Jack Black
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    Can you imagine the sex tape from these two ? The horror ! The horror !

  34. Martha Stewart Baby Stroller
    Any Guy
    Commented on this photo:

    two pics of Maggie Gyllenhaal in one week? damn.

  35. Arnold Schwarzenegger
    Anon
    Commented on this photo:

    Get unda ze umbrellllaaa!

  36. Robin Williams Glenn Close
    Commented on this photo:

    “Robin, you sure ain’t no Peter Pan anymore youself.”

  37. Rihanna
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    “I think that curry was a bad idea . . .”

  38. Mario Lopez Daughter Gia
    Commented on this photo:

    Which one has Downs?

  39. Robin Williams Glenn Close
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    Robin, please, just stop. You’re not funny any more. All of those people are laughing AT you, not WITH you.

  40. Britney Spears
    Commented on this photo:

    Where da cheese at?

  41. Brooke Shields
    edamame
    Commented on this photo:

    Why does she need to hold on to that little person to walk?
    I think the Latisse made her eyelashes grow together, and now she can’t see.

  42. Mel B Cleavage Nickelodeon Kids Choice Awards
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice cleavage, mom.

  43. Enrique Iglesias Fan Make Out Butt Grab
    Commented on this photo:

    Performing what? CPR on a fat chick?

  44. Mario Lopez Daughter Gia
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    I want to make a joke, but I got a feeling God already did.

  45. Robin Williams Glenn Close
    TomFrank
    Commented on this photo:

    “Have they gotten back to you yet on the Garp sequel? I mean, come on, it’s been thirty years now.”

  46. Josh Groban Shirtless
    Commented on this photo:

    I thought Andy Kaufman died years ago.

  47. Paris Hilton
    Commented on this photo:

    Proof that anybody can wear low rider jeans

  48. Martha Stewart Baby Stroller
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    “Jude for a girl? It’s not a good thing.”

  49. Clive Owen El Hormiguero
    Commented on this photo:

    Shazam!!! Boner!

  50. Sharon Stone Nipples
    joys of roughing
    Commented on this photo:

    So there aren’t any statements from Mr Mcqueens’ estate about this casting confusion?

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