“Squeegee your window for a dollar, m’am?”

Federline: “GET OUT OF MY TERRITORY”

“Hey mannn. I neva paid for gas before, know what I’m sayin’? Where do I swipe my maxed out card at?”

Always inspiring to see a man who’s ready to help out with the breast feeding.

“I did WHAT, now?”

Do as thy shirt sayeth!

Only his left eye is sensitive to sunlight…

Hey, bitchtits, quit dicking around and pump my gas.

His Platinum Card reads “Mr Mariah Carey”.
And it has a chubby picture of her on it trying to look 22 again.

Shouldn’t Mariah be wearing the wifebeater?

I named my kids what? I gots to stop drinkin’

Please God, let that shirt live up to it’s nickname.

He’s had that same expression on his face for 9 months now. Every now and then he whimpers.

Any excuse to get out I see.

That’s the face of a man who’s realizing he has to go home and plow the vag that he saw his kids coming out of.

Don’t get me wrong, I did the same, but at least I’m not married to Mariah Carey.

Somebody has to breastfeed these kids, might as well be me.

“Wait… how come she still fat?”

The funniest thing he has ever done was knocking up Pariah Carey

Easily the biggest phony in Hollywood today. Pathetic loser trying to get attention on his radio show by pretending to give out his home number and other fake stunts set up by the station.

“Yeah, havin’ twins is tough, but yo, I’m married to Mariah Muthafuckin’ Carey. Now will that be regular, mid-grade, or premium, ma’am?”

Two kids, and old wife and man titties. Well played son, well played.

It’s like the bill of his hat is following me!