While watching antiquated bullshit social mores crumble in the face of reality makes me ejaculate universal health care, I’m not naive enough to ignore what pays my bills, and that’s pictures of celebrities with their butts hanging out. So here’s Gwyneth Paltrow leaving her GOOP store at the Brentwood Country Market which apparently doesn’t sell $700 Kenyan pelv-minas that adequately cover someone with the ass of a 22-year-old stripper. She had measurements taken, but by gum, if the youthful tightness of her buttocks didn’t demand an immediate acquisition of a denomination she was curiously unfamiliar with. Paper currency worth one, singular dollar? How unusual.