Teri Seymour wears a bikini, could use a good meal or ten

December 28th, 2007 // 179 Comments

My original headline for this post was “Simon Cowell attacked by rogue Ethopian.” Then I did some investigative journalism (i.e. Wikipedia) and learned that it’s actually Simon’s fiancé British TV personality Teri Seymour who’s on vacation in Barbados for the holiday. I can understand why he keeps her around. She seems handy. Simon could always use Teri as a walking stick if he were on a long hike. Or, I dunno, maybe as a karate staff if he wanted to fight crime or play Ninja Turtles with Ryan Seacrest who always wants to be “Naked Shredder.”

Photos: Splash News

  1. kelly

    dear superficial,

    i wish you would post some new shit. im sick of reading about this teri character. stop enjoying your holidays or i’m switching to all-TMZ. im getting off the superficial train.


  2. DB Cooper

    You guys are fags. That ass is hot. It’s her face that sucks.

  3. Lor

    While I agree that she looks to be in shape, you never can tell if she is “too thin” unless you know other things about her health, like how much/what she eats, if she has regular menstruations, etc.

    I think she has a very healthy and admirable body… although the ribs I can see on her chest are a bit disturbing.



  5. boy in panties

    She’s smoking hot and i want to wear her bikini

  6. keller1974

    Has anyone noticed that she looks freakishly like Michael Jackson in the large picture that accompanies the story? Maybe it’s just me…

  7. momo450

    she’s not that thin

  8. linda

    YOU FINALLY post new news…three days later…and all you post is this crap?? All the other sites had this shit up DAYS ago! I came to this site for the funny commentary but even that is not enough….get it together or I am not clicking on this damn site EVER AGAIN

  9. judy jetson

    only fat americans would say she’s fat. she looks great!

  10. judy jetson

    correction to previous comment: only fat amercians would say she’s skinny. she looks great!

  11. judy jetson

    correction to previous comment: only fat amercians would say she’s skinny. she looks great!

  12. kellygrrrl

    what’s with that line from her bellybutton down?
    I thought you only get that when you’re pregnant

  13. jane watson


  14. harry smith

    She’s beautiful and slim! Hhahahah the writer of this piece must be a fatty and a jealous one at that!

  15. missy manners towel boy

    me’s got 9 inch happy ending meal romance explosion platter

  16. Roberto Consalis

    She doesn’t look that skinny. She looks healthy. I know in todays fat ass society that might look strange, but she looks healthy. Not deathly skinny.

  17. Celebs Are Whores

    This is the best that Simon Cowell can do??? She’s OK, but there are thousands of sexier girls walking the streets of NYC every day. Pretty lame girlfriend for such a rich, famous guy.

  18. BrunettesRock

    Actually, I think shes a little too skinny too.

    It seems like her body is naturally a “pear”, think Alicia Keys. Curvy bottom half with a full butt and thick thighs, top half a narrow waist, small bust and avg sized arms.

    This girl looks unhealthy by her arms and rips poking out. Pear shaped girls end up looking like this when trying to lose weight the UNHEALTHY way and they just lose too much from their top half, still big on the bottom.

    She shoulda just opted for cycling to lose the fat from her thighs then shed be proportional :)

  19. georges

    her ass is kinda fat but otherwise she’s alright 8/10. Victoria Beckham = 10/10.

  20. brunettesrock

    Forgot to add my ass looks 10 times better than that and I dont even work out. I dont have that nasty “flab” crease she has I never thought that was attractive.

  21. S

    Stop making comments about women’s bodies….PLEASE! Every women is different from the other, some have large, small, upper, lower, big butt, small boobs, large arms, small arms, large legs, small legs, large feet, small feet…what do you look like? Probably a lard ass who sits on the computer all day critizing women on their bodies! Young women read these things you write and have eating disorders because of YOU!!!!

  22. Elk

    161. judy jetson:
    “correction to previous comment: only fat amercians would say she’s skinny. she looks great!”

    And only a moron like you would say someone that is clearly anorexic looks great.

    Also some helpful advice for you: You only need to hit the post comment button once. Don’t double post, it just makes your dumb comments look even dumber.

  23. antoine.p

    Since 65% of the US population is overweight, no doubt they consider themselves as the norm.
    This woman is absolutely normal, overweight is not.
    Her body is healthy as hell, and she is slim, period.
    Has anybody ever been ill from being slim ? no
    Has anybody ever been ill from being fat ? yes

  24. Thomas

    Skeleton draped in flesh colored play doh.

    Woman = curves.

    Angular and bony = starved dog.

    You Ethiopian Refuge Body type lovers fapping to “Famine Relief Fund” commercials make me sick.

  25. Blondamnation

    #173-”has anyone every been ill from being slim? No”

    what part of the earth do you live on? Eating disorders kill people too, asswipe.
    I’m not that concerened that people will actually read your post and go “oh my god he’s right! NO ONE HAS EVER DIED FROM STARVATION!” But it bothered me because you’re so… wrong` and I have a feeling you’re one of those “I’m SLIM, because I eat raw veggies (no offense, veggie ;) to stay SLIM and so you must all be SLIM, or I’ll be ILL when I look at you” type person. Oh and I think you have a tiny little mustache-am I right?
    ANyone who uses “slim’ and “”ill” instead of “fat and “sick” is annoying and pretentious

  26. Kelley

    Is it just me or does she have a happy trail?

  27. love to fuck her butt!

  28. Knee Grows

    Last post, bitches.

  29. great body,looks delicicious and i think its wont be a problem to get string of hunks…honest…

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