Teri Hatcher in a bikini

May 29th, 2009 // 201 Comments

Here’s Teri Hatcher swimming in Miami and, Jesus Mother of God, I forgot how awesome those things are. It’s sort of like finding your favorite blanket you loved as a kid except it’s Terri Hatcher’s breasts. Also, you didn’t have to kidney punch your nephew who wasn’t even using it, mom.

Photos: WireImage

  1. one hundred and FRIST.
    yea !!

  2. Alli Watermelon

    Not a big fan of this woman, but her body looks pretty good to me! I think people consider those “flapjacks” because they’re used to seeing breast implants on here. They’d look a lot better if she just tied it tighter on the top of her bikini. A lil extra lift ;)

  3. momo

    no Tattos….?

  4. She’s always been really sexy to me!
    Love those Funbags!
    Wonder how she will look when she’s over 50?

  5. Frank

    those flapjacks need some air.

  6. live and let live

    I don’t care what all the haters say, Teri looks damn good in that bikini – and bathing suits are not forgiving…..so she looks REALLY good! Anyone who says otherwise is in denial and are desperately in need of a pair of glasses!

  7. sherrieh

    TO NUMBER 48

    Ummm, excuse me? My hubby and I watch Desperate Housewives EVERY week! My hubby is DEFINITELY not gay, been married seven years :). And I, myself, am definitely no fat housewife. I still fit into the size ones that I wore before I was preggo with my first child (I have two now). In fact, I (and most people) consider myself to be a very hot milf. And trustt me, as a waitressI have MANY occasions for people to tell me so. So, get your story straight.

    Back to the subject, I think that Teri Hatcher is def one of the most beautuiful woman of our times. However, I don’t think she is aging as well as she could, She needs to eat a little more. You have to get a little more chunkier after 40 in order to fill out the wrinkles. I don’t really think her boobs are or ever have been “spectacular”, except for when she is wearing a bra and t-shirt and they are sitting where they are supposed to. I have better breasts then her after breastfeeding two babies. I am just lucky, fortunately…..


  8. snackmix

    #99 (Rasputin) nailed it.

  9. snackmix

    #107, you sound desperate.

  10. They may no longer be spectacular, but for her age, she surely is……

  11. Sherrie

    Number 89:

    what? You seriously think that women HAVE to be older to be comfortable with their bodies and sex? Lol. I do agree with you to an extent. But I know personally as a 24 year old woman that has been prancing around butt naked and getting it on for a decade now, that you are COMPLETELY wrong. I can, and have, rocked many men (as well as women’s) world. I also know women in their forties who are so old fashioned and umcomfortable with their bodies and sex, it is sad. I have talked to several men about this subject and I usually get the idea that younger women these days are MUCH more open about sexual experimentation and pleasure. Maybe it is just you? :)


  12. Kramer

    They may no longer be spectacular, but for her age, she surely is……giddy up……catfight!


  13. haha

    well, sherrie, looks like all that prancing around naked and sex since you were 13 has finally taken its toll: you got kocked up (the MILF bit gave you away). that makes you less sexy; it gives you baggage. and i am sure that your vag is like the lincoln tunnel after the 10 years+ of sex and the baby. and maybe you should remember that after that baby, its possible no one wants to see you prancing around naked.

  14. George

    I wouldn’t win a contest with her…..not the master of my domain.

    Get your Fight on!

  15. Sherrie

    # 109:

    Maybe that is why I like Desperate Housewives so much……… :)

    I am desperate, but not in the sense that you are probably speaking of.

  16. Wow she looks great!
    But where did I read that anybody looks great wet?

  17. mafme

    +4 internets to Jackie Childs for two 90s TV references in a single post!

  18. sorb

    The greatest disappointment in my entire life was her nude scene in Heaven’s Prisoner.

  19. Jimmy

    13 (if he’s lucky) is probably getting with some real pigs, but it’s OK because they’re 20. A pig is a pig, douche.

  20. Inside Job

    I take it in the ass. Does that count?

  21. guy rossi

    I love losers who say they wouldn’t bang a chick when they couldn’t get a girl half as hot and twice the weight

  22. smarg

    15 years ago she was hot. Now she’s not.

  23. jon

    id rather see this chick posted all weekend than fat ass wide hip kim k.

  24. Amy

    So based on these comments, I should never get pregnant? All of you have scared the shit out of me. If I do, I’ll be fat, have stretch marks, and apparently have a huge vagina. No thanks. No who is going to take care of me when I get really old? That’s the delima. Better hope I make millions.

  25. Sherrie

    To #113:

    Haha, why don’t you get your facts straight before you start trying to sound like you know something, it would make you look less stupid.

    First of all, I haven’t been prancing around naked since I was 13, I actually started to do that AFTER I had my 1st child. Pregnancy made me more comfortable with my bod, which as a previous post mentioned is VERY sexy. I mentioned the fact that I had TWO children in my post, so I really wasn’t trying to hide it.

    Oh, and do you know what the second highest term searched on porn sites was last year? MILF! Second only to Interracial. So, apparently, being a mother isn’t as unsexy as you think it is. I actually heard that on Fox news, so I am pretty sure that is accurate.

    As for my vagina being all “stretched out”, once againg you are very misinformed. First of all, I had c-sections. Not that that maters anyway. The vagina is really just a big muscle that is meant to be stretched to fit a baby (or two) through. And, it WILL go back IF you strengthen it again (ever heard of kegels?). UnfortuanatetIy, I don’t think all women realize this, which is why some women may remain “stretched out” as you say. I understand that the type of women YOU would probably hook up with would most likely be the type that is too lazy to get her butt back into shape. Fortunately for myself and my hubby, I work out very regulary (5/6 days a week) with a lot of focus on pilates and yoga. Those are two exercises that focus greatly on your core, which also happens to be were all of your pelvic muscles are. :) So, my shit is just as tight as ever, if not more, since I work out more after kids. My husband has no problem letting me know what’s going on. I am definitely more sexy after kids. As for my kids being “baggage”? You really don’t have very good reading comprehension skills, so you? I wrote that I was MARRIED. For seven years, dork! My hubby is the father of both my kids so who excatly are they supposed to be baggage for? I am not looking for a provider for me or my children. Like I said earlier, I am a milf. All I would want from any other man/woman would be sex. And well since I am a female and have a pussy, lets be honest, I don’t really have to be THAT hot to get it. I could only be a five on a scale of ten and get me some dumb man(sometimes woman) to get me whatever I wanted. I probably wouldn’t even have to really have sex with them, just lead them on a little. There are woman all over the country that do this as their profession, they are called strippers/exotic dancers. Perhaps you have heard of them. All you have to do is take a look inside your local strip club to know that most men’s standards are really not that high. I am pretty sure I could get whatever I wanted from you, you seem like you may be missing a few tools in your shed.

    Amy, dont’ stress. I gained 50 lbs with my first pregnancy and I got back to my preg size within a year. It does take work though. Exercise is very important after children. The stars do it all of the time. I look at things this way, if someone else has done it, than why can’t I? You can look better after kids, women do all of the time. You just have to put in the effort, you can do it. :)

    VERY sexyMILF1984

  26. Can you imagine the poor schmuck that have to listen to #125 blab all day? its like going in one ear, and come out to the next….while you keep agreeing!!!

  27. Carpaccio

    People you gotta be reasonable!! She looks awesome for a woman in her 40s. If you can’t deal with it, maybe YOU are the ones with the malfunction…

  28. Carpaccio

    People you gotta be reasonable!! She looks awesome for a woman in her 40s. If you can’t deal with it, maybe YOU are the ones with the malfunction…

  29. Carpaccio

    People you gotta be reasonable!! She looks awesome for a woman in her 40s. If you can’t deal with it, maybe YOU are the ones with the malfunction…

  30. sherrie

    Nuber 126:

    Wow! Is that what ALL guys do when they hear someone talk, I had no idea…….

    Rough daddy, huh? Judging by the name you chose, I am going to say that men like you are like putty in my hands. I know how to make a man listen to what I am saying.

    At least my schmuck has someone to listen too, as well as give him what he wants when he wants (and he does get what he wants, as do I). Unlike you, who probably jacks off to half naked celebrities on The Superficial alone on the computer every night, wishing you could just once feel what a real pussy feels like. It’s probably been so long since you’ve had a real woman that you don’t remember what to do anymore.

    Also, for your info, my hubby and I do have verbal disagreements quite often, we consider it foreplay. We have a very passionate relationship. We fight hard and we fuck hard too. I would have it no other way.


  31. Men are putty in your hands? don’t try to pass yourself as a sexpot dear! after 2 little monsters and writing novels on the pc, you probably have more crack than an inner city slums…btw keep on guessing about my sexual profile im amused…

  32. Rasputins Liver


    124. Amy – May 30, 2009 4:33 PM

    So based on these comments, I should never get pregnant? All of you have scared the shit out of me. If I do, I’ll be fat, have stretch marks, and apparently have a huge vagina. No thanks. No who is going to take care of me when I get really old? That’s the delima. Better hope I make millions.


    No no no, Ames.

    Here’s the deal, at least with regards what I said about Teri.

    She’s a fine, decent looking woman. She’s just average though. I see women like her at that age and younger and older who look that good.

    But I see a lot of women, younger and older as well, who look even better than Teri does.

    I see a lot who look way fuckin’ worse, too. But really, let’s not go there.

    Has to do, Amy, with how the media portrays her. That she’s all that and a hundred bags o’ chips to boot. And that Seinfeld line, well, that was merely a script line. Had little to nothing to do with her.

    See, I actually do think she looks fine. In fact, her boobs’re just fine with me as well as they are indeed, obviously, natural.

    However, they aren’t “spectacular”. They never…WERE…”spectacular”.

    Teri Hatcher has average boobs. That’s it. Nothing bad about ‘em. They just WERE always kinda flat to begin with. There’s very little fullness to them, even before she had kids.

    BUT….but, Amy, that’s OK. That’s just fine. I’d rather enjoy REAL boobs like hers than fake boobs like….well….name a gazillion so-called “stars”.

    Teri Hatcher’s boobs aren’t “spectacular”.

    They are real.

    And….they’re just fine.

    Now….one time Playmate Barbie Benton’s boobs….






    Barbie just had excellent boob genes.

  33. Yank and wank they rhyme for a reason


  34. sherrie

    Whatever you say, rough daddy. What does your name mean then?

    I didn’t write men, I wrote, “men like you.” I understand that not all men are easily swayed by a sexy ass and some perky tits. I just assumed (like I wrote) you were the type by the name for yourself thay you chose.

    I am not a regular poster on these or any other forums. I am just bored at the hopital (since Thursday night :( ) with nothing to do. Excuse me if you are so unfamiliar with communicating with a smart woman who not only knows how to speak her mind, but also how to put her thoughts into writing. I hardly call what I wrote a novel. A short essay at best. You can try and down talk the fact that I know how to write all you want, but it just, wait, how did you put it? Oh yes, goes into one “ear” and out the other.

    You, on the other hand, probably hang out here for fun because you have nothing better to do. By my standards, I wouldn’t call any adult male who posts comments in the Superficial forums for fun in between jack-off sessions “rough”. More like metrosexual. Nothing wrong with that, but I wouldn’t say rough.


  35. hahaha, why are you at the hospital? the kegel apparatus got caught within the walls of your palate? looks like you need a friend, time to stop this communication this instant…

  36. Ohhh and youre new here? and never seen a rough post? keep your eyes open…

  37. R2-D2

    Boop! Hola! Beep!

  38. live and let live

    #125. Sherrie
    I’m childfree by choice and I have no ill feelings towards women who decide to have children, but I think it sounds rather desperate and attention whorish of you to rattle off all the “joys of pregnancy” and how you are showing off how great your body is after delivering a child. Aren’t the doctors right in saying that every woman has a different outcome and experience with child birth and it’s effects?

    You may be ‘perfect’ after sprogging, but some women may have a lot of issues that you did not experience in reproduction.

    I have many male friends who do admit that their wives vaginas are stretched out beyond repair and I feel bad for both the guys and their wives, but if your body bounced back like a Victoria Secret’s model then I lift my glass to you and say, “good for you” and you are special, but I hear many stories the opposite of yours.
    I guess I see your point in wanting to defend pregnancy, but it sounds to me that you wouldn’t care if you were secure in yourself. I don’t care what people think of me and my body and I face a lot of judgement based on the fact that I DON’T want to reproduce – like I’m not a complete woman and that I should just roll over and be a walking uterus (I thought we were out of the Dark Ages, guess not…).

  39. sherrie

    Time to sotp communication this instant………….

    Yes, just like I thought. You can’t keep up with me. You are clearly not as rough as you think you are.

    You are insulting the fact that I am in the hospital? LAME :( Is that the best you could come up with? The reason I am here has to do with my 2 yr old son and is none of your business.

    I’m wiling to bet that if I summed up all of the posts you’ve made here (and other websites) today, it would greatly outnumber the so-called novelas that I wrote today while in the hospital. What makes me think that? The fact that you actually have a link to some lame pic of a male lion in your postings. These forums are kind of important to you aren’t they? You actually took the time to think about that didn’t you?

    You also shoud probably try looking up what kegel exercises are, there is no apparatus involved whatsoever.

    I’m going to give you the suggestion I gave the other gentleman earlier: get your facts straight before you try sounding like you know something.


  40. caveman

    she gives me WOOD

  41. Kev

    She’s like a classic corvette that wasn’t garage kept

  42. Beep! Hello! Boop!

  43. So this is where I try to explain to you why i have the king of beast as my link? no youre not that special! you’re a loud mouth who needs attention. If you were a caring mother you would not be rambling on the pc with a stranger by trying to get upper hand with this retarded argument. Just get your sweaty sausage fingers off the keyboard and go console the poor kid will ya??
    if i had the means id report you to child services…

    by the way what do you call this??


  44. Blip! Hola!? Blop!

  45. This broad sherrie might give Linda hogan a run for her money, excellent time for that kid to become a missing person…

  46. Sherrie

    Live and let live:

    You are a fellow woman, so I don’t want to be upset with you, but you called me whorish? Whatever! I was just responding to the asshole comments those stupid guys said. I was just giving back to them what they were dishing up.

    I can be whatever I want, it is the internet! That is why the net is awesome!

    I would NEVER look down on you for not wanting to have children. As a mother of two small boys myself, TRUST ME. I understand :) and totally get where you may be coming from.

    I am not at all “whorish” in real life. I am very much a “lady in the streets and a freak in the sheets” Most people in my life would be greatly surprised if they new some of the things I like or am interested in.

    And what is with some of you people not knowing how to read and putting words in my mouth!

    #1: I never rattled off about the “joys of pregnancy” By contrast, I found pregnancy and childbirth to be a real pain in the ass. My hubby wants another one but I told him the only way I would be willing to have another is with a surrogate.

    #2 I am assuming that your comment about showing off my body was refering to the comment I made about prancing around naked. Well, I didn’t say I was doing it for the world. I was refering to the privacy of my own home. And girl, I feel sorry for your hubby/boyfriend/lover if you never learn to do the same.

    #3 Any so called pregnancy issues you are talking about? Trust me, I experienced them. Like I said, pregnancy was no joy for me. I just wanted to have children.

    #4 Like I said, i understang that the vagina gets stretched out during childbirth. But it IS a muscle and it CAN be restrengthened. It DOES take work, though. Maybe your buddies wives are just like most other typical Americans and to lazy to put in any real effort to get things back to where they are supposed to be. Kegel exercised shoud be done SEVERAL times throughout the day. Or, they could try out something like pilates? Pilates is good in the fact that it will also strengthen most other parts of your body as well.

    #5 My body did not bounce back like a Victoria Secret model’s nor did I say that I did. By the way, theirs do not just “bounce back” either, they work hard for their bodies, and in that way, we are similar. Perhaps you didn’t read my comment I wrote to Amy? Let me refresh your memory:

    Amy, dont’ stress. I gained 50 lbs with my first pregnancy and I got back to my preg size within a year. It does take work though. Exercise is very important after children. The stars do it all of the time. I look at things this way, if someone else has done it, than why can’t I? You can look better after kids, women do all of the time. You just have to put in the effort, you can do it. :)

    I mentioned the fact that it took work AND effort. And I wouldn’t call a year “bouncing back”. I would call carrying the weight around for more than a year a little too much though. I went from 115 lbs to 165 lbs in my first preg, My abs were pushed out just as far if not further than a typical pregnant women’s, but I have a six pack now. You want to know how? Pilates and ab workouts, they DO work. It IS a fact. EVERYONE’S muscles will grow and respond to regular workouts and a healthy diet, unless they have some sort of metabolic disorder maybe? I never said anything about anyone like that. Everyones’s body will also lose that layer of fat over there abdomen if they do regular cardio and put down the cheeseburger and fries for awhile. Have you ever seen the show The Biggest Loser? The proof is there. It is all about living a healthy, active lifestyle.

    And if you don’t care, then why are you talking?


  47. “I can be whatever I want, it is the internet! That is why the net is awesome!”

    There is no way anyone can verify all this, this woman might be fresh out of the gate of your local psychiatric center…

  48. Sherrie

    Rough daddy, I stand corrected, there is such thing as a kegel apparatus. So what? Is the fact that you exercise your pussy with a kegel apparatus supposed to show me how rough you are. Nope. Once again, I am going to call metrosexeual. Any man who knows something about those is a little more feminine than he thinks he is.

    Linda Hogan? You know who she is? Is your comment supposed to scare/intimidate me or something? Oh man, that is the scariest thing I ever heard from some tub of lard of a man sitting in front of his computer all day long somewhere in the world. Lol. Most of the rough men that I know don’t know shit about celebrity tabloids and gossip. No, they usually make fun of guys like you behing their backs. I would say that you have more than a few femininie characteristics. And you call yourself rough. What a joke. Rough to who, the kind of women with serious daddy issues who can look past your ridiculous screen name. Any man who calls himself “daddy” would definitely have trouble with a confident, real woman. I’m pretty sure my hubby could definitely kick your ass. And I am positive that my hubby and his friends would think you are a joke.

    I can see I def, got under your skin. Funny :), makes me smile to piss off jackasses like you. Playing with you amuses me. Like I said before, you may call ME the silly one for talking to you and taking part in this retarded argument, but you are the person who has such a dull life that you actually are well know on these forums. HA HA HA! My son is asleep beside me. When he wakes up, I will get off the computer. Just like I did from 1:30 to 6:00. You, however, will not go away until you get a life. So you will probably be on here for awhile and I will be long gone…………

    As for my “sausage fingers”? Your insults are lame, that doesn’t even make sense. On what basis are you going on that I have sausage fingers. You’re the guy who spends all of his free time in front of the computer. No, my fingers, as well as my body are very delicate and slender. The kind of fingers you can only wish to feel all over you body. As I mentioned earlier, I wear a size one, what the hell kind of women who wears a size one has sauseage fingers? Your comments are LAME and have no real intelligece behind them. Hell, you had to use Hulk Hogans comments. Lol. Take your cock out of your hands for a while, maybe your brain will start to work again.


  49. sherrie1984

    Rough man:

    That might make it better, wouldn’t it? If the so called rough man was getting showed up by a woman fresh out of the local psychiatric center? Funny. How old are you rough man? Does it bother you that a 24 yr old woman is getting under you skin? I find it amusing……….


  50. sherrie1984

    Rough man:

    “I can be whatever I want, it is the internet! That is why the net is awesome!”

    This comment stands true for everyone, especially you, who is defininetely not who he claims to be. ROUGH man! HA! What a joke. More like gentle kitten.

    I didn’t really mean it in that context anyway. I meant it as I can be whorish i I want, I can be funny if I want, I can be a bitch it I want, etc. etc. Not that I can straight up lie about myself or falsely misrepresent myself as you did. I think you know how I meant it anyway, or maybe you really are just that dumb.


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