Teresa Guidice Told Her Kids She’s Going To Jail While Filming ‘Real Housewives’

March 6th, 2014 // 29 Comments
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Reality television is a shithole inhabited by shitheads doing shitty things for shitty people to watch, so it really shouldn’t come as a surprise that Real Housewives of New Jersey star Teresa Giudice decided to exploit the most traumatic moment in her children’s lives so she has a better storyline than Carmella Meatball Buttafuoco Spaghetti. And there’s no way that’s not the name of one of the chicks on that show. Just no way. Radar reports:

However, the producers were able to film Teresa and Joe Giudice telling their four daughters about their decision to admit guilt and their reactions.
“They filmed her telling all her kids, it was an emotional time for her,” the source told Radar.
“She wanted to be completely honest and so she showed that to her family her fans are going to get to see that too.”

“Mommy, why are you telling us family stuff while the camera people are here?”
“Well, sweetie, mommy doesn’t know how long she’ll be gone, so she’s hoping this very private and emotional moment where your life falls apart will get lots and lots of ratings so there’s a spot for her when she gets back.”
“Oh. But, you and dad are going to be gone for a really long time, right?”
“That’s right, baby. I know it’ll be har- ohmygod, are you smiling? She’s fucking smiling! CUT.”

Photos: Splash News

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  1. Balls Mcgee

    The evidence she’s more plastic than real is deafening.

    • Randal

      Sexy doesn’t even begin to describe the beautiful curves that accent the soft body, eyes glittering and sparkling with a playful hunger, along with glowing skin and warm smile.

      Love the braces too, keep it up girl! Growl!

      Randal

  2. Her kids don’t stand a chance of being normal. It’s only a matter of time before her daughters are famewhores and the sons are beating their girlfriends.

  3. Teresa Giudice
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    The powerful combination of smug and stupid is clearly strong with the little one.

  4. I’ve seen foreheads, fiveheads, even a couple sixhead but a onepointfivehead is something new.

    Those are some ugly fucking dogs up there. Even the pups.

  5. Deacon Jones

    Her daughters just went from potential strippers to future full blown double anal pornstars. At least you got it on tape, Monkey Face

  6. PassingTrue

    Just for fun, I’m going to suggest that the best and only chance these kids have is to spend a few years away from their parents.

  7. Teresa Giudice
    Commented on this photo:

    I can’t believe God allows human beings like this to exist as children.

    • JC

      Given the gene pool they’re coming from, it’s amazing they weren’t stillborn due to massive chromosomal abnormalities.

  8. Oscar

    Buttafuoco to you too, Matthew!

  9. Slash

    When is somebody going to produce “Shot Into the Sun”?

    The title pretty much explains the concept. We start with every adult connected with every show with “Housewives” in the title. Then work our way through the cast of every “reality” show. Every week, a different show.

    Duck Commanders (or whatever the fuck it’s called): into the sun!
    Honey Boo Boo: into the sun!
    Kardashians: into the sun!

    Somebody needs to make this happen. I predict bigger ratings than “Ow My Balls.”

  10. I’d like to take a moment to talk to all of you about forced sterilization and parental licensing.

  11. Teresa Giudice
    Little Tongue
    Commented on this photo:

    Had she only lasered off that weird hairline – that makes her look like a neanderthal – maybe she could have married better and avoided all the legal shit. Just sayin’.

  12. What a stupid ass bitch. Can’t they find something else illegal that she’s done to keep her away forever?

  13. Inner Retard

    I hope by the time they get out of jail those kids won’t want to go back to them on the count of experiencing true love and care in the meantime

  14. Cher X

    I think it sucks that people are picking on these kids, they look just fine. However, Mom and Dad really screwed them out of whatever normal life they would have had.

  15. Ok I’ll admit it I’d pay $2.00 dollars to fuck her.

  16. Teresa Giudice
    coljack
    Commented on this photo:

    “I’m just so proud of my little one here. The other day, I tried to talk to her about something she said to her sister. She turned over the table, called us both liars, posted the whole thing to YouTube, and then released her own clothing line.”

  17. Teresa Giudice
    Commented on this photo:

    I know it’s not the right thing to say or help the situation in any way, but holy shit those are some ugly kids.

  18. eilliM

    What the fuck is up with their eyes. Is that some kind of syndrome?

  19. What the hell, did they just clone all of them? Are these aliens?

  20. anonym

    those are some ugly kids

  21. Teresa Giudice
    Joe Blow
    Commented on this photo:

    WTF is up with those eyebrows? All three of them… geez.

  22. Napoleon Bonaparte

    We are Siamese if you please.

  23. I wonder if the kids reading this today know what “Buttafuoco” signifies, or if they just think it’s the Italian way of saying “buttfuck.” Which, let’s face it, we were all thinking at the time, even if it went mostly unsaid.

  24. gigi

    wtf… these are little kids, and they’re cute… they’re products of overindulgence, sure, but hopefully this experience will show them what NOT to do… the older one especially seems pretty self-aware

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