“And it’s nothing I don’t already do for free/meth. Hmm…”
Vivid Entertainment’s Steven Hirsch is out of his fucking mind. When he’s not trying to fulfill some sick, twisted obsession with providing shelter for Octomom, he’s pursuing people who have absolutely no place being in porn. People like, oh I dunno, Amber Portwood. Hollywood Life reports:
A source tells HollywoodLife.com that Teen Mom’s Amber Portwood recently bragged that celebrity porn powerhouse Vivid Entertainment wants to give her $500,000 to star in an X-rated film.
According to an inside source, there have been ongoing discussions between Amber and Steven Hirsch, the co-chairman of Vivid.
Granted, I’m sure there’s an audience dying to see Mama Fratelli from The Goonies get the business because we live in the greatest country on Earth, there’s no way you could pay me to watch this thing get knocked up on camera. Obviously that’s the only way it knows how to have sex or we wouldn’t even be having this discussion in the first place. In fact, I hear if she gives you a handjob, you have to drive her to Planned Parenthood within 72 hours which, unfortunately for Gary Shirley, is on the way to KFC. “Man, I’m not ready to be a dad- Oooh, chicken bowls.”
Photos: Splash News
They NEED to offer her some psychiatric counseling for her anger problem..
this is absolutely disgraceful. They should sriously stop making this womans life hell and focus on the real problem at hand. People are so petty these days that it makes me sick. anything to make a quick buck.
Everyone relax. Theres going to be no penetration. Straight bukake flick.
hahaha i heart you
I’m proud to be an American
That is one hell of an ugly girl. She’s going to be one of those big, white trash bruisers in another few years.
Isn’t porn supposed to be kind of erotic? I just threw up in my wastebasket here at the Justice Department.
I think Vivid does an ‘amateur porn’ division..Probably what Steven has in store for her.
She needs to do some smeared mascara stuff with a shit lubed ass pounding that proceeds directly to jackhammer throat fucking. That would at least begin to right the cosmic wrongs that have allowed her to gain some level of stardom on a network that shouldn’t even exist.
You are so rude, and that was probably the most disgusting thing i’ve ever heard. So what the girls got problems… big fkn deal.
Will this be considered a ‘Horror Flick’? …my penis already inverted because of fear.
Oompa-loompa doopity doe,
if you get preggers you’ll get your own show.
I’d pay good money to see her fat head used in one of those Pumpkin’ Chunkin’ slingshots.
How old is she?..People are so f*cking sick these days.
Is $500,000 enough for an eye transplant from Hugh Jackman? Because thats what its going to take to get me to see this shit.
I hope she gets her ass pounded in it.
you’re amazing! Haha
@Wally Gatorade
“That is one hell of an ugly girl. She’s going to be one of those big, white trash bruisers in another few years.”
Going to be….?
Yeah, going to be. She needs to put on 150 lb first to qualify for the big, white trash bruiser weight class.
My thoughts exactly…
puke
Those reports have to be a lie. Bestiality is illegal.
Either she’s well-endowed or they want her to do Sloth.
Wouldn’t offer her $5 to fuck let alone $500K to film it.
The only porn I would watch her in would be an anal rape video that ends with her being snuffed.
That would make a mint on pay-per view.
And cue the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse.
Tell them they’re on in five…….
.
I’d watch her take a dick.
You’d watch your Aunt Bernice take a dick too, doesn’t mean the REST of us want to see that…
Good money, I’ll pitch in. This will be a snuff film, no?
that pretty much sums it up
She does look like Mama Fratelli though. Or her faced got flattened with an iron and someone had fun with tan crayons. Expect the dvd to be $100 to recoup the lose.
539
Tomorrow’s Headline: Humanitarian philanthropist offers Vivid Entertainment $1 million NOT to make teen mom porno.
Hell I’d let my little brother fucker her; he needs a shot of leg bad!
Damn I spelled fucker her? I’m an idiot
A rep for Amber’s would-be Rottweiler co-star has issued a statement to the effect that is client would rather be returned to Michael Vick.
This is a shakedown by Vivid, isn’t it? They want to see how much we’ll pay for them NOT to make this video.
She comes from Anderson, IN, a true redneck shithole if there ever was one. She would likely be treated as royalty there for doing this. Guys will likely get her naked picture on the mudflaps of their trucks.
This was undoubtedly a dream for her from a tender, young age as the folks from A-Town have unusually lofty goals set for themselves from birth.
Knocked-up at 16? Check.
Arrested for assault and battery? Check.
Lose daughter? Check.
Make 500 Large for doing porn? Check.
A truly natural progression of events.
Now she can cruise and just eat McDoubles for the rest of her life off of the interest of her $500,000 paycheck. Talk about gravy train with biscuit wheels.
‘Mudflaps’ might be the name of the movie she’s in, considering.
She wouldn’t have a dime of the $500k in two years, much less any interest from it.
You paint a stirring portrait of American Exceptionalism.
Yeah, she’s obviously interested in this. Word is she has been calling Playboy too and trying to convince the other girls to do it with her.
Why bother with Playboy? She should know they have standards!
PLEASE SAY YES PLEASE SAY YES PLEASE SAY YES PLEASE SAY YES
Not becase I want to see her, no but I would love for her to go into a real downward spiral, first porn then drugs then prostitution, all for my amazement
But I would still watch the porno, kinda curious how she looks underneath
PLEASE SAY YES PLEASE SAY YES PLEASE SAY YES PLEASE SAY YES PLEA
She has already knocked out 3 of these four. All is left is to do porn AND get paid (in cash, not meth) for it. Her crotch is probably more rotten then any dump in the greater USA.
I think Vivid is getting WAY TOO desperate these days…Can’t they find quality talent?
It’s a publicity stunt that they are fairly confident won’t even proceed to a negotiation stage
Why would someone pay her for something I am sure someone has already got on tape for free and just doesn’t remember or chose to forget? ick
Dear Vivid,
It has come to my attention that you hate our penises. I can only presume that you’ve invested in Viagra and are attempting to create widespread erectile dysfunction to bolster your profits. As clever as this plan is, I’m afraid that I have to declare Jihad on you on behalf of our dicks.
Regards,
The World
Dear Vivid,
It has come to my attention that you hate our penises. I can only presume that you’ve invested in Viagra and are attempting to create widespread erectile dysfunction to bolster your profits. As clever as this plan is, I’m afraid that I have to declare Jihad on you on behalf of our dicks.
Regards,
The World
Well said. One addtion – to get quality talent instead!
This is nothing more than a publicity stunt. Should someone happen to stoop that low and take the bait, it just blows up 100 times in size.
I always said they needed to increase their BBW section, but this ain’t what I had in mind..
I thought Ron Jeremy retired?
It would be beyond perfect if Ron was her co-star.
Hm, she’s not even half as scary when her hair isn’t the same color as her face.
Whaaaa…? What’s the target market for a product like this?
They should produce a Throw-Up-In-My-Mouth double-feature with her.
Her and Ron Jeremy in a hetero film.
Her and Snooki doing lesbo.
I actually wretched a little at the thought of her and snooki.
I would sooner fuck a bag full of hair and vomit than pay $19.95 to watch her get cornholed by some dirtfarmer. But then again, I’m a good Christian boy.
Mudflaps indeed.
There’s obviously been a misunderstanding. She’d do it for a Pepsi and a Snickers bar. The $500K has been authorized as an offer to get a guy to put his dick in her.
She agreed to porn for five ’100 GRAND’ candy bars
‘MudFlaps” … best line of the day!!!! hahahahahahaha
Ohhhhh man … you see when you have a demented imagination you start dreaming up of co-stars for her in the movie. Ron Jeremy has some acting talent so that’s a no. K-Fed would be in it. Snooki. Amy Winehouse. Screech from Saved by the Bell. The ‘Bear’ from the Grizzly Adams TV show (Unless Khloe K agrees to shaving), Chris Brown, and the long awaited return of the Cowardly Lion …
My chief complaint about porn throughout the years has been that the women are too attractive. Porn is for women who aren’t even marginally attractive and Vivid clearly understands that.
Yea, the last thing anyone wants to watch are beautiful women having sex. That’s why FuggliesBumpingUglies.com is a huge hit, right?
I hope you weren’t injured when your sarcasm detector exploded. Talk to Frink though, he’s pretty good about honoring the warranty on those babies.
Great – porn for meth addicted, raging Oompa-Loompas.
portwood? i think limpwood is more appropriate. surely they can find a stray great dane withou a peanut butter allergy to guest star
This would sully the reputation of pornography.
Wow. I just threw up a little in my mouth.
What’d you do? Look in the mirror again?
Person with a problem – quit using my handle.
Wait..I’m talking to MYSELF again..
Just remember kids, it’s not a snuff film if it only kills her dignity
My GOD she’s just not a pretty girl. A face just made for porn I’d say. (pig nose)
Why would G_d allow this?
Even though I think this is complete bullshit, isn’t she under 18 years old?
I would pay this whore NOT to do porn.
Why the hell would anyone want to see that naked on purpose?
Or sober