Taylor Swift’s New Single Is So Edgy, You Guys – Srsly

As Taylor Swift lubes her fans up for a two month slow-burn of hype for her new album Reputation, she’s doubling down on the whole Kanye vs. Taylor feud. Her first single, “Look What You Made Me Do,” was released last night and her fans are reacting like she just carbombed Archduke Ferdinand. Me, on the other hand, I thought the song was a little too broad stated to draw some of the conclusions that others are making, but hey – what do I know, it’s not like I don’t appreciate a good celebrity feud (it’s basically all that keeps gossip sites like this afloat… that and fake boobs).

“Look What You Made Me Do” has some aggressive elements to it I guess, she claims that the “old Taylor can’t come to the phone because she’s dead” so that’s like… a real sign of maturity, I guess? Gone are the days when lyricists would threaten to skullfuck the extended family of their rivals (RIP Tupac), now it’s this veiled passive aggressive shit that’s just vague enough to skate around when confronted by whatever praetorian guard following Kim Kardashian’s ass around these days. Instead Swifty has taken a more angsty, Panic At The Disco-esque approach to playing the victim card. The chorus is also a rip off of “I’m Too Sexy” by Right Said Fred so that’s… more irrelevant stuff.

So in summary I guess this song is like a “sorry, I’m not sorry” thing when you do something stupid that was completely your decision… like getting a belly button ring and telling your parents that you’re only dating the 31-year-old who works at the movie theater because he’s teaching you how to give good blow jobs before you go away to college. These are important life skills, DAD! Look what you made me do, DAD!