Taylor Swift Used The Women’s March To Market Her New Single
Up until Monday, the last time anyone cared what Taylor Swift was doing was back in October when people thought she was banging Drake, which is hilarious, because he’s had sex with Rihanna and you don’t go from a butt sex smorgasbord to the sexual equivalent of a glass of tap water. So, it’s no surprise that just days after she suddenly took an interest in politics just as a worldwide protest was happening, she also teased her new single. Regardless of the general perception that Tay-Tay seems like a vengeful, asexual student council President, it’s undeniable that she still somehow makes money in the dying music industry.
“Ms. Swift, we’d love to distribute your new single.”
“How kind of you to offer, gentlemen, but I’m perfectly capable of selling my own music. However, I do have one current staff opening.”
“No, pick me!”
“*snaps pool cue in half* We’re gonna have tryouts.”