Taylor Swift Hurt John Mayer’s Feelings

June 6th, 2012 // 53 Comments
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Just in case you forgot how huge of a super douche-canoe John Mayer is, and/or the anecdote about him using Fifty Shades of Grey to pick up chicks wasn’t enough, here he is whining to Rolling Stone about Taylor Swift writing a song about him dumping her which is something he would never do. No, never.

“It made me feel terrible,” Mayer says in the new issue of Rolling Stone, on newsstands Friday. “Because I didn’t deserve it. I’m pretty good at taking accountability now, and I never did anything to deserve that. It was a really lousy thing for her to do.”

Mayer now tells Rolling Stone that he learned about Swift’s feelings directly from her song. “I never got an e-mail. I never got a phone call,” he says. “I was really caught off-guard, and it really humiliated me at a time when I’d already been dressed down. I mean, how would you feel if, at the lowest you’ve ever been, someone kicked you even lower?” When asked about the song’s line, “Don’t you think I was too young to be messed with?” Mayer says, “I don’t want to go into that.”
Mayer also takes issue with “Dear John” as a musician. “I will say as a songwriter that I think it’s kind of cheap songwriting,” he says. “I know she’s the biggest thing in the world, and I’m not trying to sink anybody’s ship, but I think it’s abusing your talent to rub your hands together and go, ‘Wait till he gets a load of this!’ That’s bullshit.”

Just so everyone’s clear, John Mayer is literally whining about the fact that his ridiculous fame and wealth allowed him to bang a hot, young famous musician, immediately kick her to the curb while she was still getting dressed, yet she had the nerve to write a song about it because she was just a teenager not even two years earlier who probably thought he was going to marry her when he said the words, “If we do this, I’ll marry you.” Wow, talk about a bitch. It’s like he fucked Hitler.

Photos: Fame/Flynet, Pacific Coast News


  1. YoMamma

    Uh, doesn’t he write songs about his post conquest all. the. fucking. time? See Jennifer Aniston. What a crybaby.

  2. Taylor Swift Cameltoe Short Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice shorts. I can see her clef note.

  3. Dan Quayle

    She is quite fine

  4. If she was getting dressing, then he could have at least wait until she tossed some salad.

  5. Hank E. Ring

    Poor poor Johnny

  6. Smapdi

    Mayer has long been rumored to be “Super Duper Cooper” in blind vice items, with said Cooper favoring bedroom activities that make Kim K and Ray J look like novices:

    Kind of takes the fun out of thinking about Aniston, Swift, and the pre-fatty Jessica Simpson. Its just a wonder that Swift didn’t title her song “Johny made a dookie”.

  7. Taylor Swift Cameltoe Short Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    The only reason she dates is to get a song out of it

  8. Sheppy

    For her, I’d even wait ’till we’re married before banging her.
    How much of a gentleman am I?

  9. God, this guy continues to amaze me with what a pussy he is…

    Nice shorts, sweetie.

  10. JC

    So the guy who himself admitted that he should shut the fuck up about non-music things–because he’s a total asshat who can’t shut the fuck up–continues to not shut the fuck up? He’s an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, smothered in douche sauce.

    Isn’t this also the guy who wrote a bunch of twee pop songs for 12-year-old girls so that he allegedly could get famous enough so he could do “real music.” What a complete fucking shithead.

  11. Frank Burns

    A tip for you, Mr. Mayer – when a little girl beats you up, its best if you don’t go around talking about it.

  12. Kevin

    Who is John Mayer? Oh, right…that guy that bangs hot chicks…

  13. Anon

    Can’t wait until Taylor’s inner batshit crazy is completely unleashed and becomes accepted a common knowledge.

    This chick is well into her 20′s as still acts like she’s in middle school– you just know something ain’t right when you call out the kid who didn’t want to date you in high school during a hometown concert just to feel good about yourself.

    John Mayer just needs a tampon. He’ll be alright in 3 to 7 days.

  14. Taylor Swift Cameltoe Short Shorts
    Mike Walker
    Commented on this photo:

    Check out the massive cameltoe. Taylor has a nice one too.

  15. some people are stupid

    Yeah Mayer’s a douche, but Taylor Swift has seriously got a screw loose. She’s s crybaby who wants to publicly humiliate everyone who doesn’t like her. You know what that’s called? A loser. She’s a rich and famous loser. She’s still got all this high school bitterness and she loves constantly bringing it up. Move on sweetie, or it won’t be long until people get sick of your panty-wailing.

  16. Taylor Swift Cameltoe Short Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    ….is that a cup of FART?

  17. Cher X

    Um…isn’t this the same guy who called Jessica Simpson “sexual napalm” in Playboy and then had to apologize publicly for it?

    Pot meet Kettle.

  18. Taylor Swift Cameltoe Short Shorts
    Dick Smokehand
    Commented on this photo:

    That would be so great, but no cup of liquid FART… That cracks me up!!!!

  19. JJ

    What a fucking hypocrite. Look, Taylor Swift does need to get over her whole thing about writing about exes and high school and shit. But he does the same exact fucking thing, running his mouth off about Aniston and others in the bedroom. Pot, meet Kettle. And to be frank, I’d give her more of a break because she’s 21/22 and I think she was a teenager when that all went down. He’s a full grown man, and he probably either plucked the cherry of a teenage girl (girl was linked to gay and gayer before that (that Twilight kid and one of the Jonas Brothers)…or at least got something from her, and then treated her like shit. In real life, that’s fucking creepy and terrible behavior.

  20. Bob

    The dude’s pathetic! Oh no a girl hurt my feelings!
    Also – hypocrite.
    Doesn’t he – along with about 90% of musicians – make songs about his exes?
    All musicians write songs about their exes and heartbreak. Hell, that’s all country is about.
    Everyone calling TS a pathetic little girl should STFU! EVERY musician does the same thing.

  21. Jade

    I don’t know anything about Mayer. But I think the song was a low blow. If Taylor Swift wants to act like an adult, and do adult things (and people), she shouldn’t throw a childish fit and then accuse the guy of taking advantage of her because of her age. If she’s legal, she’s legal. Her stupidity is her own problem. But if he’s already got a rep, don’t go bang him and then complain about his rep. She shouldn’t be allowed to play the victim card just because she’s pretty.

    • JJ

      The thing is, he does the same exact thing she does and to a larger extent. He talked shit about all his exes and wrote a song about one of his exes.

      • Jade

        Wow.. and these are the people we support, by buying their shit music wailing about the people they’ve loved and lost? I’m going to bitch about people and stuff, set it to music, and get rich!

        P.S. I don’t really listen to music much. I only listen to it when driving. I don’t own an mp3 player, and can’t remember the last time I bought a cd.

      • dooood

        music is wonderful. but they made a whole industry to rape and destroy it.

  22. Cock Dr

    He broke up with her because she wouldn’t peg him hard enough.

  23. Kallum

    Does anyone REALLY think they “banged”? Seriously. I’d bet Taylor is still a virgin. Unless she sleeps with men a day after they meet since her relationships last about 5 minutes. Her songs are overly dramatic interpretations of her life. Mayer probably realized she wasn’t “available” and lost interest. Hence ‘Dear John’.

    • informer

      Dear John,
      Mama said “Don’t you realize
      That Mayer’s just tryin’ to womanize”
      I told my mama not to be to be afraid,
      ‘Cause if this goes wrong then we’ll get paid
      But Mama, he loves me forever…
      ever and ever

      Dear John,
      When you said that it was just the tip
      I thought you meant of our lifelong relationship
      But then you plowed me like a low-rent whore
      And shoved me out the hotel room door
      Those 2 minutes weren’t forever…
      ever and ever

      Dear John,
      Maybe I’m a princess and not 40-years-old
      Still I hoped you’d give me something round and gold
      So when you kicked me out into the cold
      I knew that ring transformed into records sold
      ‘Cause RIAA royalties are forever…
      ever and ever

  24. El Jefe

    She is so goddamn hot she can write a song about me any day.

  25. LordViperScorpion

    If you think about it, Taylor Swift is quite a slut. She’s run through quite a few guys already and she’s young.

  26. SeeAlice

    Does that cup say FART ?

  27. Taylor Swift Cameltoe Short Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    This is SEXY!! Miley please take note of this. Taylor looks sexy, youthful and classy. Trashy side boob in hillbilly cut of shirt and ripped booty shorts isn’t.

  28. kimmykimkim

    You know what, John, you’re right. You didn’t deserve to have a song written about you at all, because you’re a goddamn idiot. Now quit cryin’ you little bitch.

  29. Taylor Swift Cameltoe Short Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    That episode of south park – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HtWGCxqrjJU

  30. I can only listen to somebody whine for so long before any appeal they had fades away. For Taylor Swift it ended a year ago.

  31. Charles

    Awww, ….Who the F*** cares! Grow up, you damn momma’s boy.

  32. DonkeyPunchAmandaBynes

    I bet Jennifer Aniston is laughing her sexy little ass off,
    John mayer is a little bitch.

  33. Arnold S.

    Taylor likes variety in the penises that violate her.

  34. Kallum

    I think the reason John didn’t stick around is the same reason Jake didn’t stay…they gets no play. Why be in a ‘relationship’ if the prospect of sex doesn’t exist. If Taylor is sleeping with all these guys then why doesn’t the media so fast to label others sluts or whores call Swifty the same. Think about it Mayer, Gylenhaal, jonas, lautner..etc. etc. etc. She’d be easier to spread than Peanut Butter.

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