Good Gawd, Taylor Swift’s Body

May 20th, 2013 // 66 Comments

After spending the morning equating Ke$ha‘s face with terrorism, making light of body issues and generally violating a woman’s privacy, the least I can do is put on my sensitivity hat for a minute and acknowledge that once you ignore every single thing that defines her as a human being, Taylor Swift is not only sexually attractive, but was easily the hottest chick at last night’s Billboard Music Awards. I feel like I lost my edge just typing all that, but sometimes I’m a delicate ocean of emotion in a sea of flowers. Get lost in my waves!

Photos: Getty

superficial

  1. I finished before I finished….If you know what I mean

  2. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Those look like the some shorts she wore here, http://www.thesuperficial.com/taylor-swift-cameltoe-09-2012; except this time she added buttons. Cheap bitch.

  3. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    *same

  4. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    emma watson's Vagina
    Commented on this photo:

    ok. this is why she can be as boring as she wants to be.

  5. ThisWillHurt

    No mention of her giving the “ick” face to Selena Gomez kissing Justin Bieber? Because I didn’t like her until that moment.

  6. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    Can they arrest just your midsection for say…pelvis on pelvis crime? Cause that’s probably what would happen if my man-boner and hate-thrusting came in contact with her lady-junk

  7. Deacon Jones

    Guarantee she’s an awful lay

  8. reinhard heidrich

    don’t get the high waisted shorts she always wear with those stupid oxford shoes

  9. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    Canadian Houseguest
    Commented on this photo:

    “Oh my gawd Tay Tay, who whitens your teeth? Fabulous!”

  10. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Is it just me or is makeup getting thicker and thicker lately? Are they charging by the pound now?

  11. anonym

    I wanna fuck this psycho bitch !!

    She actually seems alright

  12. Jon Stewart

    Too bad she doesn’t put out.

  13. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    Whatever
    Commented on this photo:

    She kinda looks like Kristen Stewart here…? Must be the biting-of-lip. And frown.

  14. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    m0nster
    Commented on this photo:

    I didn’t know Aaron Paul was a dancer, too.

  15. Despite her scrawniness, she actually looks stupendous. I think a night spent in the swamp that is my bedroom would do wonders for her.

  16. JC

    Considering what her body looks like, consider how excruciating she must be to be around if she can’t keep a guy interested in it for a week.

  17. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    blerg
    Commented on this photo:

    I love this scene in Clockwork Orange…

  18. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    Skeeter
    Commented on this photo:

    She seems crazy but I would like to do her in the butt.

  19. cc

    For a week long run at that. I’d risk being immortalized in an unflattering song.

  20. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    Smapdi
    Commented on this photo:

    Uhm, that’s creepy.

  21. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    Smapdi
    Commented on this photo:

    Except for the icky white girl up front, this could be great tribute to Michael Jackson.

  22. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    Kelly
    Commented on this photo:

    Do you always speculate how good a lay a guy is?

  23. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    Frank Burns
    Commented on this photo:

    “This concert brought to you by director and designer Roman Polansky’s ‘Frustrated Pedo-Bear’ fashion line. Because dressing your over-18 to look like an under-13 is perfectly legal.”

  24. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    The bald dude’s checking it out.

  25. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    dezaras
    Commented on this photo:

    MORTAL KOMBAT!!!!!!!

  26. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    Pat
    Commented on this photo:

    I betcha that guy is thinking something like “Ha! And mom said I should have studied and stayed in school.”

  27. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    Donkeylicks
    Commented on this photo:

    “I knew something was wrong when a little, pretty white girl casually walked away from an asian wearing a Tom Cruise Vanilla sky mask. Something is wrong here. Dead giveaway.”

    - Connor Kennedy

  28. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    donkeylicks
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d probably be making that exact face too if I was paid to provide Taylor Swift with an intense camel toe wedgie… or if I could simply find a girl who would talk to me… I mean when I’m not taking her order…

  29. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    donkeylicks
    Commented on this photo:

    Someone should probably foreword this set to Beyonce’s publicist.

  30. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    Monsignor Nelson
    Commented on this photo:

    Let’s hike these shorts up and see just how big this camel-toe can get.

  31. Goddamn, she looks banging. Hot as fuck.

  32. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    Giggity
    Commented on this photo:

    Curveless, pasty, and not very pretty. I just don’t get what’s so great about a board with makeup.

  33. Sandoucheky

    Her Bieber-slams yesterday made me like her for a second, and that opened me up to exactly what you’ve found – she was the hottest piece at the whole show.

  34. tlmck

    Sorry. All I see is an stick with no talent.

  35. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    Jenn
    Commented on this photo:

    All those masked people behind her, are her personalities….today.

  36. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    AWOL
    Commented on this photo:

    At least you will never leave me. my precious Billboard awards….

    Wait where are you going? Come back!

  37. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s a 5’11″ lollipop that I want to suck on for a day

  38. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    I agree that physically she’s very fuckable, but that personality and the fact that she can’t keep a boyfriend, means that she either a raging bitch or a prude and I have no interest in either one of things.

    She can go fuck herself.

  39. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Her outfit is some kind of special. The girl is 23.

    • Burt

      Why do you think she’s dating barely out of high school guys? So her tween fans don’t realize she’s as old as their homeroom teacher.

  40. Freebie

    Her implants make her look better. Hope she doesn’t trade them in for bigger ones.

  41. lilgrandma

    I think she looks sexy and beautiful NOT like a slut!!

  42. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    IHAVEBONERS
    Commented on this photo:

    I LIKE HER BECAUSE LEGS.

    FAP FAP

  43. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    Bob Hopeless
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s good to see Michael Myers is still getting work.

  44. I would take Jennifer Morrison over Taylor Swift any day.

  45. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    Fred
    Commented on this photo:

    View Full Size. GG.

  46. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    BeckyStyle
    Commented on this photo:

    Hi Missy, I mean.. Mom

  47. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    ANonymous
    Commented on this photo:

    The NAUGHTY things id do to her!

  48. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    ANonymous
    Commented on this photo:

    YUMM!

  49. Taylor Swift Billboard Music Awards
    ANonymous
    Commented on this photo:

    NOW THATS AN ASS!!! DAAAAAAAAAAMN!

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