Taylor Swift Thinks Wearing A Vintage Bikini Will Impress The Kennedys

August 20th, 2012 // 56 Comments

TAYLOR: Why do I have to keep wearing these old-timey bathing suits every time we swim?
CONOR: My dad says it’s in case I kill you we can just say we found one of Uncle Ted’s old girlfriends from the 60s frozen in an inbox.
TAYLOR: What?!
CONOR: I mean, pretty! You look so pretty in them. …. Please don’t write a song about this.

Photos: INFdaily


  1. Crissy

    Wow, what a fucking douchess!!!

  2. tlmck

    Isn’t that bikini the same style worn by the girl that got killed in the car wreck?

    • tlmck

      It has also been my experience that girls who are that conservative in public tend do do unspeakable things in the bedroom.

      • Smapdi

        And by ‘experience’, you mean no experience whatsoever.

      • sid

        This girl is far from inexperienced she hooked up with John Mayor and everyone else in Hollywood. Since she has no ass or tits, plays up her good girl image everyone gives her a free pass. If she had a rocking body everyone would be calling a slut or whore daily. This bitch gets around! Slut!

      • sid

        Also a stage five clinger. Desperate and akward seems like she must be a very dirty girl prob John but it in her butt and mouth a few times

      • tlmck

        Au contraire. There was once a little Catholic high school girl back in the day, followed a few years later by a very friendly librarian.

      • Smapdi

        We believe you were at the library. The rest, not.

  3. Jaariel

    Maybe she should write a song about Mary Jo Kopechne, as, like, foreshadowing.
    Oh, and ugly swimsuit, Swifty

  4. No Standards

    Usually I’d say that it doesn’t matter and that I’d hit it…. but she looks like a frumpy skeleton.

  5. Mr Smap Beav Sr

    This woman has to be the stupidest twat when it comes to finding a guy. People keep saying it’s because she is young but that is starting to wear a little thin. How many times do you have to get screwed over to learn to pick them even a little better. Now she has chosen the ultimate “fuck them over” family she could find….not going to work out well in the end!!

  6. Taylor Swift Bikini Conor Kennedy
    Commented on this photo:

    Covert the chastity belt, I guess…

  7. Savalas

    It’s true. I look at her and think “Rosemary Kennedy”

  8. Taylor Swift Bikini Conor Kennedy
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Good luck being a Kennedy clan plaything.

  9. Frank "Snothead" Burns

    It is lamentable that inbreeding has made the Kennedy family blue blood so unsteady that they must now engage in hillbilly miscegenation.

  10. USDA Prime McBeef


    It’s 16:51 central time, so you’ve got 9 minutes. Otherwise I’m protesting it by not clicking.

    I will be goddamned if The Superficial interferes with my non-work time.

  11. vgrly

    She’s following the Kardashian playbook. Go to the beach with full on makeup. So superficial, perfect for this site.

  12. Taylor Swift Bikini Conor Kennedy
    Frank "Snothead" Burns
    Commented on this photo:

    “I dare say, Swifty, that my grandmother’s Betty Boop swimsuit fits you like a veritable glove! Fah fah fah fah!”

  13. USDA Prime McBeef

    Did I get spam filtered for the all caps kanye talk?

    Anyways, it’s late, I’ll be damned if waste my non-work time on TCWM. Plus I just checked… Rita Rusic is back again. no thank you.

    but seriously. before 5 central time. Thanks.

  14. Colin

    The retro look wouldn’t be bad if she was doing a magazine shoot or something instead of standing next to a douchebag wearing a sagging pair of shorts and boxers.

  15. El Jefe

    She is pretty hot, too bad she is going to die before she gets to write a breakup song.

    If I was getting on a plane or a train or in car or boat or even an elevator and a full blooded Kennedy got on, I would get off. Those fuckers are cursed.

  16. Taylor Swifts Tampon String

    I would gladly clean her asshole with my tongue even after feeding her a steady diet of Taco Bell.

  17. Taylor Swift Bikini Conor Kennedy
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks the part she is so class. If only other young starlets could model themselves after her instead of being trashy hoes *cough* Miley….

  18. Taylor Swift Bikini Conor Kennedy
    Commented on this photo:


  19. theoriginal LJ

    I must be old (actually I AM old), but when I was growing up that thing that Swift is wearing was called a “Two Piece Bathing Suit”, not a Bikini.

    Even Annette Funicello was showing belly button in the bikinis they wore in the Beach Blanket Movies from the 60s.

  20. Taylor Swift Bikini Conor Kennedy
    Commented on this photo:

    i can make out his weiner.

  21. Moggster

    Ugliest “bikini” I’ve ever seen, what’s she trying to cover up?

  22. name

    Am I the only one that thinks this chick is not cute? She looks like the product of Renee Zellweger mating with an elf.

  23. Taylor Swift Bikini Conor Kennedy
    Commented on this photo:

    Troll Photobomb!

  24. Taylor Swift Bikini Conor Kennedy
    Commented on this photo:

    The dude wearing boxers under his swim trunks?
    This ususal?
    We supposed to wear boxers under swim trunks?

    • Burt

      You do when the photographer suggests you pose for a few leisurely pictures by the beach and you have to change in the car.

  25. Taylor Swift Bikini Conor Kennedy
    Commented on this photo:

    Do you think the men of the family have passed her around yet?

  26. Does it bug ANYONE else that she and other starlets are INCAPABLE of standing up straight? If she carried herself with more poise she’d look a lot better.

    Miley, I’m looking at you too.

  27. McClownerton

    Ah, the kid can pick ‘em. Hopefully she will have enough sense to 1. keep a steady supply of antibiotics around when dating this guy and 2. she doesnt go riding over any bridges.

  28. The only person she’s ever impressed was the fuckass who signed her to her first contract by not scraping those giant teeth along his shaft as an ugly little 14 year old.

  29. terry

    No ass or tits.
    She must give good head. And she just won’t age right.

  30. Emmanuel

    I do think this handsome Kennedy boy is too much for this red neck

  31. She’d be safer getting in the van at the beginning of “Silence of the Lambs.”

  32. Taylor Swift Bikini Conor Kennedy
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice package, Conor

  33. Burt

    Wouldn’t it be awesome if she gave her best, fake, “Gosh darn it!” look to the camera?

  34. Taylor Swift Bikini Conor Kennedy
    Commented on this photo:


  35. Taylor Swift Bikini Conor Kennedy
    Commented on this photo:


  36. Taylor Swift Bikini Conor Kennedy
    Commented on this photo:

    looks like a frog walking. I keep expecting her to break out into “Michigan Rag”.

  37. Taylor Swift Bikini Conor Kennedy
    Commented on this photo:

    Clearly concentrating on her out of existence

  38. Taylor Swift Bikini Conor Kennedy
    Commented on this photo:

    Dude, quit wearing the duchebag boxers and the pulled down swimsuit.

  39. Taylor Swift Bikini Conor Kennedy
    Commented on this photo:

    Thang God uncle Ted isnt around anymore! She’d end up at the bottom of a sound somewhere!

  40. Taylor Swift Bikini Conor Kennedy
    Commented on this photo:

    Said one Kennedy to the other “You gonna eat that?”

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