Tara Reid somehow engaged

January 21st, 2010 // 36 Comments

Tara Reid’s rep has confirmed she’s engaged, according to Us Magazine. I’m going to assume the lucky man has only seen her naked in the pages of Playboy because there’s no way he didn’t shove his penis in a boat propeller the first time she offered to have sex.

NOTE: For those of you going with “the dude’s blind,” he still has a sense of touch, people. Something would’ve tipped him off when he found himself fondling a sack of Play-Doh with stegosauri for breasts.

Photos: WENN

  1. Rachel

    Another report explains everything – apparently the guy is a Superficial commenter, so naturally he’s a virgin.

  2. mensa

    She doesn’t look that bad. I’m going to stop defending average to slightly-better-than-average people on this site, however. It gets me nowhere. Why are people so vicious to people that haven’t even met?

  3. argleblargle

    Her whole life has been a horrid bachelorette party. Time to settle down and get married for 5 minutes I suppose.

  4. Valerie

    She looks good and happy in these pictures.

  5. cbuzz

    Is his name John Goeslin?

  6. Taz

    She was hot in Van Wilder

  7. pimp

    @1 Rachel – can i eat your ass?

  8. CARLO

    After all the pics we’ve seen of her looking horrible, I don’t think I can ever change the way I feel about how nasty she is.

    She has a pretty face…so did lots of fat girls but that isn’t what I search for in the mornings

  9. KaChingMe

    All covered up she looks good and her happiness in the pics seem genuine.

    Lest we forget, Tara portrayed the trophy wife in one of the greatest comedies of all time – The Big Lebowski directed and produced by the Coen Brothers.. (of course her character – Bunny proffered The Dude a BJ for $1000, so kudos to the casting director for his keen sense of character)

  10. Chris J

    @Commentator: post a pic of your girlfriend/fiance/troll/wife. Let us figure out what you should do with your penis…..assuming you could find it under the flap that hangs over your belt.

  11. Greenman

    Is that piece of shit car what she’s driving these days?

  12. JJ Daddy-O

    Haha! Is that her ’98 Altima the valet is driving away in the background?

  13. Randal

    Tara, congratulations from all of us here at The FISH! Your engagement is a special moment you will always remember when you look back on your life and the success you’ve had. Your man is a lucky fellow to have such a wonderful young lady at his side.

    All the best to you both.


  14. chupacabra

    britney murphy in 3…2…1…

    BTW, pink lipstick and a red dress don’t look so good. Maybe try a nude shade or straight up red instead, ok? you got that, empty eyes?


  15. BaccusVd

    I used to think she was cute in a trashy way…. but after all the drinking, drugs and partying even now that she’s cleaned up (a bit) I’d still want to double up or better yet wear one of those hazard suits when I banged her lumpy ass.

  16. Biff Smith

    I would hit it,

    While watching her in American Pie or Van Wilder,

    She’s complain because I would require one of those two to be playing whilst we banged but she’d get used to it…

  17. just sayin'

    stupid slut has been around the block waaaaaaaaaaay too much. The guy must be a real loser

  18. GeneralEmergency


    You must be new here.

    Yup…Your effusive, Pollyanna sincerity gave you away.

  19. Vinnie the Chin.

    Maybe he’ll cause her to focus on career and life in a better way?

    Who am I kidding? She’s doing it for the open bar at the wedding reception!

  20. whattheshit

    How you gonna keep ‘em down on the farm once they’ve seen Karl Hungus?

    Just sayin’.

  21. Denman

    That’s a pretty quick rebound for Tia Tequila, engaged so soon?

  22. dB

    Wait, she’s made of play doh and has stegosauruses for breasts? Is she marrying Geekologie?

  23. IMHO

    She has been through a lot! I am glad that she found happiness. I hope he’s not a tool…

  24. Yeah

    I’m not going to lie… she actually looks hot as hell here. I can’t believe I just said that…

  25. with the exception of the cock-sucking faggots, there isn’t a man here that hasn’t dropped his pants and punched out a snooki to these pics


    Tara Reid

    There once was a woman named Tara
    Whose skin looked like Yogi Berra
    It was flabby and thin
    But when caught by the wind
    She could set sail the French Riviera

    {www . sbbshoe . com}

  28. lucy

    Hey, I’m an open minded girl from UK, I’m interested in exotic things, photography, dating and sports…I have my photos on — SeekTall. com —, I love tall guys!
    Do you love traveling and have some experience? Just find me out….

  29. joho777

    Ease up, guys. Tara isn’t married yet, so this may be more PR to try to rehabilitate her image, that’s all.

    What she has done to her body with repeated botched surgery and drugging/drinking should make any prospective boyfriend be very cautious before beginning any kind of relationship that lasts longer than a BJ.

  30. LouR

    Who is she engaged to?….. a dildo.. with enough batteries to jump start your car?

  31. heff

    Chalk Tara up as being yet another girl that looked great when she first came on the scene. As fame and fortune increased her great looks have decreased. Such a shame!

  32. James

    Because she’s SO TERRIBLY DISFIGURED that she hardly looks like a human anymore. Right.

    She looks fine. get the fuck over it.

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