Tara Reid showed up for the premiere of “Reservation Road” in Beverly Hills last night. She actually looks sort of hot. Which is weird, I know. Underneath all that inexplicable hotness is a sordid tale of plastic surgery gone horribly wrong. But, yet, she looks decent. My penis is so confused right now. He’s just staring out the window, letting out the occasional sigh. Nothing makes sense to him anymore. I tried to get him to go lift up cars like we do every Friday, but he just turned to me and said, “What’s the point? When we’re done, Tara Reid will still be do-able.” *sigh*
Photos: Getty Images
eat me | October 19, 2007 at 4:46 pm
first bitches!!!!
suz | October 19, 2007 at 4:46 pm
first
FOIST | October 19, 2007 at 4:46 pm
FOIST
eat me | October 19, 2007 at 4:46 pm
pwned you bitches!!!!!!!!
Bobbeh | October 19, 2007 at 4:47 pm
XD
Hilarous as usual.
Bigheadmike | October 19, 2007 at 4:47 pm
I would love her long time. Ok a short time but it would be fantastic. At least for me.
WanderingMrWiggly | October 19, 2007 at 4:49 pm
Mr. Wiggly has put Tara on my short list of girls to do when I am out and about.
omj | October 19, 2007 at 4:50 pm
she’s only doable as long as you don’t lift up her dress and see the franken boobs of death or her curdy stomach
FRIST!!! | October 19, 2007 at 4:53 pm
I was going to say that she actually looks really good there and that the dress hides her tummy, but then I read #8 and, yeah…what he said
Grace | October 19, 2007 at 4:54 pm
To think all this time I thought she was in an alcohol induced coma.
sam hain | October 19, 2007 at 4:55 pm
1-5 – nice…not.
Yay! she’s hot, breasty and not Britney! Nice work, way to get us out of a rut.
Oh, and buh-buh-buh-buh-bubuh-buh….
Texas Tranny | October 19, 2007 at 4:55 pm
I’d like to……………………….
never mind
Lonewolf | October 19, 2007 at 4:55 pm
well she has pretty ehm,.. ehm,.. EYE yeah Eyes was what i was gonna say,.. yeah eyes,.. boobs.
FRIST!!! | October 19, 2007 at 5:03 pm
My penis is starting out the window too.
My 10 and a half…
(notice I also used the typo?)
Manny | October 19, 2007 at 5:05 pm
The best part is that those things are filled with gin.
ph7 | October 19, 2007 at 5:06 pm
That dress is nothing but a boob trophy case.
I like to see the a similar vagina trophy case dress worn by, say, Jessica Alba.
ph7 | October 19, 2007 at 5:07 pm
I like the woman scowling in the background in picture #8 and #10…
d-girl | October 19, 2007 at 5:07 pm
I think looks flawless and I have to agree with #11…Yay! Not Britney!
#1-4 Your losers
costar | October 19, 2007 at 5:12 pm
Jessica Alba’s vagina looks like the mouth of a goldfish floating on the top of the tank. Smells like it too.
TS | October 19, 2007 at 5:22 pm
Not bad. You gotta give her credit. A couuple of years ago she was headed for Britneyville but she pulled it together and laid low. Britney should take some advice from Tara. How fucked up do you have to be if taking a page out of Tara Reid’s book would do you some good?
And on another note, clearly #’s 1-3 just don’t get it. Unfortunately I haven’t the energy to really let them have it. It’s tantamount to teaching linear regression analysis to Corky.
FRIST!!! | October 19, 2007 at 5:27 pm
Ok, I give up, been wondering this for like ever, but, what does pwned mean?Somebody answer me in the next ten seconds or I’ll go crazy and start killing people in the parking lot…
Donkey Ass | October 19, 2007 at 5:29 pm
She looks much better than she did in the past.
Motorboats anyone?
Ooba Gooba | October 19, 2007 at 5:31 pm
What exactly does she do?
TS | October 19, 2007 at 5:31 pm
I think it was a typo for “owned” as if the speed at which he got in made him “own” us rather than making him look like a fucking jackass.
FRIST!!! | October 19, 2007 at 5:34 pm
Well, that’s what I thought too, TS, but I’ve been seeing it for several months now. It must be intentional, it couldn’t possibly be typoed that many times. Maybe it is some new acronym or slang, maybe I’m not hip and cool anymore.I thought I knew everything. This sucks. Screw waiting til 5, I’m having my midlife crisis martini early today.
Balls Johnson | October 19, 2007 at 5:38 pm
first niggs
girl | October 19, 2007 at 5:39 pm
you can look up pwn on wikipedia, it did start off as a typo for owned.
Balls Johnson | October 19, 2007 at 5:39 pm
Also I would fuck the poo out of that guy in the pics
VimGander | October 19, 2007 at 5:40 pm
“pwn” originally was a typo for “own,” and it’s stuck around and become something of a fad among nerds who can’t get laid.
supes | October 19, 2007 at 5:41 pm
You should feel good that you don’t know what it means. The only losers that use that word anymore are gamers and the fucking morons who still sya “first” when theyt post first on a fucking celeb bash board.
TS | October 19, 2007 at 5:42 pm
Jesus…….
1MILF Hunter | October 19, 2007 at 5:43 pm
Too bad that dress doesn’t have an exposed midriff to show off that beautiful belly of hers. She needs to accentuate her positives.
marina | October 19, 2007 at 5:44 pm
She looks pregnant!!! Puaj!
www.celebslamer.com | October 19, 2007 at 5:44 pm
she is looking fabulous these days
TS | October 19, 2007 at 5:45 pm
What a bunch of tools…Holy smokes.
* MISS UNIVERSE | October 19, 2007 at 5:47 pm
How does anyone know she has had surgery ?
*********************************************************************
FRIST!!! | October 19, 2007 at 5:48 pm
No, it’s great, TS, WE DIDN’T KNOW THAT!!!
we ARE cool!!!
FRIST!!! | October 19, 2007 at 5:49 pm
Oh, wait, but we know it NOW. So…well as long as we never use it.
Auntie Kryst | October 19, 2007 at 5:52 pm
Man Tara needs to get back on the fuckedupcrazyasshit stick. Back in the day she’d make Britney blush. Truly the student is now the master. Sunrise sunset I guess.
no | October 19, 2007 at 5:52 pm
Her legs are jacked.
fcuk u | October 19, 2007 at 5:53 pm
lmao @ ppl trying to pwn ppl who use pwn.
TS | October 19, 2007 at 5:57 pm
FRIST,
let’s face it, we already know we’re cool. We certainly didn’t need any confirmation of that.
SWEETS | October 19, 2007 at 6:00 pm
TARA LOOKS GREAT. THERE IS NO SIGN OF SUN DAMAGE ON HER CHEST. I LOOKED CLOSELY. VERY CLOSELY.
SHE STILL HAS BEAUTIFUL BLUE EYES
Grace | October 19, 2007 at 6:01 pm
I didn’t know what you were talking about with her stomach so I had to google it. After 5 minutes of continuous vomiting, I was able to see color again.
sherlock | October 19, 2007 at 6:02 pm
I’m willing to venture a guess that SWEETS is neither svelte nor demure.
TS | October 19, 2007 at 6:04 pm
41, we’re not trying. It’s a given. And don’t speak until spoken to. You better recognize.
And before lashing out, I’m just fucking with you. It’s Friday. Lighten up.
Jimbo | October 19, 2007 at 6:04 pm
NEW POST!
Sherlock | October 19, 2007 at 6:24 pm
I eat my own boogers. No one else will let me at theirs.
Ript1&0 | October 19, 2007 at 6:30 pm
She should change her name to Karla Hungus.
FRIST!!! | October 19, 2007 at 6:49 pm
TS, you are hilarious.
#44 Grace so are you
wait, #41, so are you!!!
How come everyone is funny whenever I leave? Weird…