Tara Reid Tweeted Her Honeymoon Photos
And thankfully they’re all out of focus.
Even though I’m willing to bet 99% of the Internet already forgot she got married just a few days ago – Thanks, whiskey. – here are pics from Tara Reid and Zack Kehayov’s honeymoon where they posed for cutesy, self-taken couple shots before eventually writing their initials in the sand with her herpes scabs because Tara Reid is a filthy lump of Whore-Doh. A tender moment that taught this jaded blogger that, as my great grandfather used to say, “there’s a lid for every jar,” and sometimes that lid allows a incurable infection to lodge itself in your sex parts. (For the record, he didn’t say that last part, but then again I was two when he passed, and had such conversations relayed to me at a later date by third parties prone to censorship and revisionist tales. For all we know he could’ve spoken eloquently about the perils of tallywacker insertion and religious decorum deprived me of education from said follies which mayhaps informed me to recuse myself from fornication with unclean women, their infestations legion. - The Superficial Writer, August 17, 1864.)