Tallulah Willis Cited For Alcohol Possession

May 2nd, 2011 // 109 Comments

Posted by Photo Boy

Tallulah Willis, the 17 year old daughter of Bruce Willis and Demi Moore was cited for alcohol possession after the cops saw her and her friends getting out of a car carrying some booze. TMZ reports:

Law enforcement sources tell TMZ … cops spotted three girls getting out of a car in Hollywood at around 11:00 PM, carrying what appeared to be two bottles of alcohol. The officers probed further and determined it was indeed the hard stuff. Here’s the problem … all three girls are underage. Tallulah Belle and her cohorts were cited at the scene for underage possession — but since Tallulah Belle — who has appeared in “The Scarlet Letter” and “The Whole Ten Yards” — is a minor, cops couldn’t just release her …. they needed to find an adult to pick her up.

The article goes on to say that she called Bruce, but Demi actually picked her up. I can only speculate as to why she called him, but I know that there’s no substitute for a little girl that needs to have daddy wipe away the tears from her mannish square-jaw and tell her that everything is going to be alright. “Shh, sweetie, its ok. *wipes tear* Ow, that damn thing cut my knuckles again!”

Photo: Fame

The Superficial is in Vacation Mode this week. Normal posting resumes Monday, May 9.


  1. bing

    The problem is that she might still have some alcohol left on her, her jaws having an integrated whisky-flacon.

  2. Lila Joy

    I’d get drunk too if I got the short end in the looks department from that family… and that’s saying something! Have you seen Rumer or Scout.

    Also, seriously, are they related to the Palins?

    • lkflfklkfffff

      Ooooooh EDGY with the Palin remark. yawn.

    • DKNY

      I can’t figure out who is more to blame for the chins. Demi has a very square but not big jaw, Bruce has a big jaw but more rounded. Did all the kids just happen to get the big+square genes?

      • antoine bugleboy

        Do Demi and Ashton Kutcher have any kids together? Imagine what they must look like with his square jaw DNA. I’m picturing humans that bear a striking resemblance to Mayor McCheese.

  3. Queequeg

    Smokers suck!

  4. Mr Ed

    Geez, this Wonder Woman reboot really sucks.

  5. Oh come on Tallulah why the long face?

  6. Snooki's Taint

    That’s cruel. She is, of course, growing into her plastic surgery. Keep your eyes on her boobs, you’ll see!

  7. JC

    To avoid being recognized by his 6 fans, Jay Leno attended Coachella in drag.

  8. Osama-sleeping with the fishes

    Bruce and Demi must be so proud .Check out picture#5 holding 2 smokes in each hand like Daddy with 2 Berettas?

  9. Hugh Gentry

    Damn, Bruce and Demi made some ugly ass kids. You would think the girls would be somewhat pretty and look like their mom. It must suck to be a chick and look like your dad.

  10. Chris

    How can two relatively attractive people consistently produce the same unattractive face shape? Genes are a bitch!

    • spookyfish

      This is the curse of what happens when attractive people share bodily fluids. So if you want attractive kids, your best bet would be to get impregnated by an ugly mole man.

  11. Tallulah Willis
    Commented on this photo:

    Bruce and Demi must be brother and sister. It’s the only excuse for two such attractive people to have such fugly kids.

  12. Almost “giggity” from the neck down. Totally “giggity” from the neck up.

  13. Neen

    what’s with the celebs(i used that term loosely) wearing these unflattering, high waisted cut off jean shorts?

  14. Tallulah Willis
    Commented on this photo:

    Photos like this really test my loyalty. I prefer women, but also tits. American- flag-wrapped tits.

    Why must I choose??!?

  15. Deacon Jones

    My reaction to viewing her breasts, was like a fake sneeze.

    I *wanted* to like them, but I just couldnt do it.

  16. BigJim

    “I likes me them French fried taters mmm hmmm…”

  17. BigJim

    Proof that Demi was cheating on Bruce with Leno.


    Well, she has her mother’s fantastic ass….that’s got to mean something.

  19. Shouldn’t they have called Jay Leno instead?

  20. Tallulah Willis
    What the deuce?
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice fucking shorts.

  21. Why do people still smoke?? It’s like she’s not unattractive enough, she needs to add yellow teeth,premature aging and smokers cough into the mix.

    • Clarence Beeks

      I agree. It is one thing for old people to do it- I understand the addiction. But young people who start? IDIOTS.

  22. Empire Carpet Guy

    Willis and Demi had some NASTY looking kids. Can you imagine their crappy luck. They all ended up looking like Bruce.

  23. From the nose up, she looks like Sasha Grey, which incidentally is the only part you see when she’s giving you a — wait a minute, she’s only 17? Great, now I have to wait a year to finish my comment.

  24. Ted

    She’ll be fine, as long as she keeps working on her jab. They always get obsessed with the right cross, forgetting that they need the jab to set it up.

  25. She was also cited for Minor in Possession of Leno’s Chin.

  26. I just want to know one thing. Who shrunk the Iron Giant and made it wear a wig?

  27. Alaran

    “They look like big, good, strong hands. Don’t they? I always thought that’s what they were. My little friends. The little man with his racing snail, the Nighthob, even the stupid bat. I couldn’t hold on to them. The nothing pulled them right out of my hands. I failed.”

  28. Tallulah Willis
    Commented on this photo:

    1982 called, they want their shor…. ahh fuck it! You know what? You’re fucking ugly!

  29. Tallulah Willis
    Commented on this photo:

    Bruce Willis attacks Jay Leno in 3… 2…

  30. Tallulah Willis
    Commented on this photo:


  31. Drew


  32. Donald Trump

    Not once ounce of muscle tone on her entire body. Disgusting. I wouldn’t even let her touch my 70 year old peen.

  33. Looks like she should have been cited for possession of chin in excess of legal limit of 5lbs.

    Aren’t 17 year old boobs supposed to look a LOT better than that?

  34. Tallulah Willis
    Commented on this photo:

    her legs are gross

  35. JOSH

    my wife is older than her, by about 10 years and has a way sexier body, this little brat has a flabby body and no muscle tone, yet has all the money int he world to look good and looks like a ho

  36. Charles Sheen

    jesus muthafuckin christ! wtf is that? u see the trap-jaw on this monster? is she half pelican?

  37. CC

    Wonder if that muff looks like Mom’s? Just saying.


  38. ingen haagen daaz

    khloe whoredashians long lost twin

  39. One thing is for certain. Demi Moore has a vagina shaped like a square….

  40. Tallulah Willis
    Commented on this photo:

    While she may be unattractive to most, let us not forget there are the Mr. Potato Head fetishists who would love a night alone with that thing

  41. MoJoTee

    Girls, learn from this: NEVER wear a “tube-top” or strapless belt in front of another person, let alone in public. They smush and deform you. Google images of it for more proof of how ugly those tops look on everyone who ever wore one….

  42. Tallulah Willis
    Commented on this photo:

    17 years old, a tat on her tummy, busted for alcohol possession and photographed while lighting a cig while less than half dressed. Kids learn what they live. Demi and Bruce must be SO proud of their daughters. Major parenting FAIL.

    • oh i know

      right??!?! not to mention her nasty bare feet, yuck! let’s see, she’s 17 so her mom basically quit parenting HER to parent ashton when this girl was 10 years old or so…no wonder she’s a mess…..tsk tsk….

  43. krutboo

    she looks like she has the mumps – how the hell did Bruce Willis and Demi create these awful looking beasts?

  44. Quagmire’s illegitimate daughter.

  45. BigOkie

    Confirmed: 18 years ago Demi banged Rocky Dennis sans protection resulting in this… girl-ish thing?

  46. Mr Obvious

    I want to like those boobs but I think I would need her to wear Demi mask before I would touch them.

  47. Cosmo

    Wow, Sloth from “The Goonies” has a better rack than I remembered.

  48. smiley

    Okay what is going on with this girl’s face??? Demi and Bruce = lantern jaw?? But I guess we should give the girl a break, with a face like that, how can you blame her for being a teenage fuckup boozehound??

  49. oermens

    The poster child for fetal alcohol syndrome.

  50. JiminyCrickets!(excusemyfrench)


    i’m confused too i never noticed this Quagmire esq deformity on Bruce before (still don’t really) but good god!!! poor child has to look at her mom on a regular basis i’d definitely develop an issue or 2 EARLY!!!

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