Posts tagged "WTF"

And Now Miley Cyrus Twerking In A Unicorn Suit

In case anyone’s felt the need to say Miley Cyrus constantly “acting out” is what drove Liam Hemsworth to another continent, here she is bralessly twerking in a unicorn suit, so I think we can all put that theory to rest. “Acting out.” Ha! You kids and your words.

Photos: GSI

By: The Superficial / March 21, 2013

Wait, That ‘I Give God 10% Why Do You Get 18′ Receipt Was Real?! Jesus…

When the “I Give God 10% Why Do You Get 18″ for a tip receipt start floating around the Internet a few days ago, I completely wrote it off as another way too good to be true fake. Even though I know from personal experience there is absolutely no worse table to wait…

By: The Superficial / January 31, 2013

Bristol Palin Received Death Threats After Obama, Gay Marriage Post. Goddammit…

Probably the worst thing that could’ve happened after Bristol Palin(‘s ghost writer) wrote a hilariously hypocritical blog post criticizing Barack Obama’s support for gay marriage is an excuse for her to play the martyr, and of course, this being the Internet, she was handed that on a silver platter. Granted, comments can be faked, I’m…

By: The Superficial / May 15, 2012

David O. Russell Fondled His Transgender Niece’s Breasts, Claims It Was Consensual

Seen here doing a remarkable job pretending Mark Wahlberg’s lack of prosthetic breasts doesn’t bring him unspeakable sadness, The Fighter director David O. Russell is apparently under investigation for fondling his 19-year-old transgender niece’s breasts even though he claims she told him to which, let’s agree, makes this sound not-at-all fucked-up. TMZ reports:…

By: The Superficial / January 6, 2012

Anne Hathaway is Dangerous, Also Cheap

“Pay for contacts when I found these perfectly good glasses out back? Surely, you jest.”

While filming her role as Catwoman for The Dark Knight Rises, Anne Hathaway almost took a stuntman’s eye out during a fight sequence and figured a pen would make a great apology in a world where 98% of…

By: The Superficial / June 7, 2011

Coco & Ice-T Renewed Their Vows

Do you, T of Ice, take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, through sickness and in health, through tearing that ass up and her being all tired and shit but she still let you look at a titty while you rub one out, for as long as you

By: The Superficial / June 6, 2011

Reese Witherspoon Burns Blake Lively

“My words gonna make your kids not grow no more, bitches.”

While receiving her Generation Award at last night’s MTV Movie Awards, Reese Witherspoon decided to unload on Hollywood by basically calling out Blake Lively, who presented an award not even 10 minutes earlier, and the entire reality television industry which took some…

By: The Superficial / June 6, 2011

Octomom’s in a Bikini Again

Because it’s Apocalypse Day on The Superficial, here’s Octomom posing for a new bikini shoot because who knew shatting out 14 kids would cost money? And working a real job is hard. On that note, apparently Octo is joining forces with Tila Tequila and the hooker/porn star Charlie Sheen tried to kill because FrankLohanTinoZord wasn’t…

By: The Superficial / June 3, 2011

Michael Lohan and The Situation’s Dad Found Each Other

“Let me tell you how much I love this guy. If he was a vagina, I’d kick him.”

When The Situation’s dad Frank Sorrentino Mafia-punched his way into our hearts with hilarious YouTube videos about how shittily he raised his son because apparently Italians think the mob is the Invincible Hand of parenting,…

By: The Superficial / June 3, 2011

Were The Blake Lively Nude Photos Meant For Ben Affleck?

Start crying and I’ll tattoo you again, bitch. Violet, look, Mommy has a balloon sword!”

After the second batch of nude Blake Lively photos were leaked online making it obvious she took them while filming The Town, rumors of an affair with Ben Affleck immediately started up again along with 800 blind item…

By: The Superficial / June 3, 2011

Lindsay Lohan’s Ankle Monitor Went Off

“Must.. jam.. butter knife.. in.. green.. wire..”

So, remember last year when Lindsay Lohan had to wear a SCRAM device and it went off every five minutes because she’s a fucking idiot? You’ll never believe how things are going with her house arrest. Via The LA Times:

The “Mean Girls” actre…

By: The Superficial / June 2, 2011

Justin Timberlake is Going To Die

Justin Timberlake can basically have sex with anyone he wants – I was about to say, “now that he’s single,” then caught myself – including Olivia Wilde and Mila Kunis, except Us Weekly would have you believe his penis fancies the soft, murderous touch of a Muppet on heroin because that happens:

Justi…

By: The Superficial / June 2, 2011

Justin Bieber’s a Foot Fetishist

Wait. Shouldn’t she be washing His feet?

Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez’s relationship, or “Jelena” as it’s now known in the bubble gum circuit, already has a superfan who’s dedicated to stalking these two love birds and taking uncomfortably close photos of their blossoming love. Photos like the one above of a shirtle…

By: The Superficial / June 1, 2011

Snooki’s Wearing a Neck Brace Now

After crashing into her police escort yesterday and refusing medical treatment at the scene, here’s Snooki suddenly requiring a neck brace in Italy today which I’m sure has absolutely nothing to do with the two police officers she put in the hospital having legal grounds to sue her, and everything to do with her not…

By: The Superficial / May 31, 2011

LeAnn Rimes Doesn’t Know What Abs Are

LeAnn Rimes posted the above photo on Twitter over the weekend prompting the following exchange with a fan who expressed understandable concern that her favorite country artist is dying in front of her eyes:

@AJPaterson1987: Whoa, you’re scary skinny! Sorry don’t mean to offend but that’s a lot of bones showing through skin…

By: The Superficial / May 31, 2011

Snooki Crashed Into a Police Car

“Issa okay, Mr. DeVito. I no tella the people you a famous movie star.”

Because cop-killin’ tastes likes pickles, yo, Snooki managed to crash her car directly into the Italian police escort tasked to keep her safe Monday afternoon, leaving two officers in the hospital. Of course, in everyone’s defense, who could’ve honestly…

By: The Superficial / May 31, 2011

Lindsay’s House Arrest Sounds Draconian, And She Made a Bikini Movie

Lindsay Lohan started her house arrest yesterday, and just in case you didn’t think her sentence was cushy enough, she’s allowed to have as many visitors as she wants on top of no longer taking blood or alcohol tests. It’ll be a miracle if she makes it through the night. RadarOnline reports:

Under…

By: The Superficial / May 27, 2011

Charlie Sheen’s Finally Getting His Porn House

He can barely contain himself.

Because cocaine told him there’s no way a live show wouldn’t reap him $100 bajillion, Charlie Sheen’s Beverly Hills mansion is up for sale. Except within 24 hours of hit going on the market, it’s already got a bidder, according to TMZ:

Sources connected to the…

By: The Superficial / May 27, 2011

January Jones Probably Has Matthew Vaughn’s Baby in Her (UPDATE: Or Not.)

It’s starting to become more and more likely that X-Men: First Class director Matthew Vaughn cheated on his wife Claudia Schiffer by sticking a baby in January Jones who kept it for reasons we’re still not sure of, but early speculation points to she’s a bitch. Anyway, apparently Matthew and Claudia bailed on a Beverly…

By: The Superficial / May 26, 2011

Maria Shriver Didn’t Have Enough Sex With Arnold

“Do naht hate da playah, hate da game.”

Arnold Schwarzenegger reportedly used to complain that Maria Shriver didn’t have enough sex with him which seems like a weird reason to make yourself the target of a massive criminal investigation considering she looks like the goddamn Predator. And, yes, you read that right, Maria…

By: The Superficial / May 26, 2011
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