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Weston Cage is Single, Ladies. And Apparently Your Daddy.

“Wait, aren’t you the babysitter who kicked my ass? — Can we go to McDonald’s?”

Despite her awesome, huge breasts, Weston Cage has officially divorced his wife Nikki Williams after six months of marriage which still makes two crazy alcoholics who beat the fuck out of each other more genuinely in love than… More »


Weston Cage Has A Reality Show Now

When we last left Weston Cage he was following up his whirlwind tour of getting his ass kicked by every virtually person in his vicinity including himself by checking into rehab to become an action star and prove he’s not crazy. Well, apparently that didn’t last very long, because now he’s filming a reality show… More »


Weston Cage Checked Into Rehab To Become An Action Star. Okay, Sure.

“So what my film pre-supposes is, maybe getting your ass kicked means you’re not crazy.”

After finally winning/losing his first fight, albeit against himself, Weston Cage has checked back into rehab for reasons that reveal his mom Christina Fulton is just as fucking crazy as he is which raises serious questions about the… More »



Weston Cage Arrested For Kicking His Own Ass Now. Why Not?

Weston Cage’s wife of only four months Nikki Williams has huge breasts so you’d just assume he’d be doing everything in his power to have sex with them as much as possible. Things like, I dunno, not doing karate on the sidewalk every time the paparazzi go, “Hey, look, it’s Nicolas Cage’s batshit son!” Then… More »


Weston Cage is Doing Karate For The Paparazzi Again

“I’ll drop-kick you yet, Smurf that only I can see!”

While most of us wake up, grab a cup of coffee and prepare to work for a living, Weston Cage apparently starts his days by doing karate for the paparazzi now. Which is probably better than his usual routine of drinking until Satan’s… More »


Weston Cage Did Karate Outside of a Restaurant

Taking a page from Mel Gibson’s Guide to Crazy Fighting – “Remember, your opponent might be invisible, and that’s where they hide the blowjobs.” – Weston Cage and his freshly shaven-head put on a karate show for the paparazzi last night because he really needs people to believe he’s a skilled martial artist who can… More »


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