Elizabeth Gillies Boobs Are The Only Good Thing About The ‘Vacation’ Reboot-Sequel-Whatever-The-F*ck

Elizabeth Gillies boobs are in Vacation, so look forward to checking them out in ten months on HBO. More »

How The Hell Are Only 30 People Following @BobDuato? (Subtitle: I’m On Vacation)

“You are now here to seek your retribution, Kenny Powers, in front of this nautical-themed gift shop complete with a great white shark edifice constructed by none other than BOB DUATO.”

When you image my personal life, I’m sure it’s not unlike a James Bond movie if James Bond made dick jokes about… More »

Daddy’s Home

Khloe is really good at skateboarding, May 7, 2011.

My sweet, sweet children, come sit on papa’s knee,

Before diving back into wildly speculating on which celebrities are pregnant only to distract everyone with bikini photos so I don’t get sued (Will that ever stop working?), I just want to say… More »

Vacation Mode

Khloe and I go for a bike ride, May 1, 2011

Dearly Beloved,

After my last attempt epically failed in a pile of perpetual rain, joybuzzer MacBook tingles and still needing to post – *dabs tears away from weepy vagina* – I’m giving this vacation thing another shot for the next… More »

The Superficial Will Return Monday

If you’ve been listening to me whine/caterwaul out of my sandy vagina on Facebook, you’ll know my beach vacation has been a goddamn rainy mess the entire week on top of the joy-buzzer MacBook. (Turns out it was not faulty wiring. I just got Steve Jobs’d by an AC adapter that shit the bed after… More »

Vacation Mode

Good morning, citizens!

Before hunkering down for the fall/winter months and becoming Grizzly Adams with a porn addiction, I squeezed in a long overdue vacation. Literally my first in over three years, but enough about the hardships of blogging in your underwear. What does this mean for you, o, sucklers of my words? More »