Posts tagged "Tish Cyrus"

Miley Cyrus Wore This To Fight AIDS

Because every post about misogynistic reactions to the academic discussion of sexist tropes should be followed by pics of Miley Cyrus’ cleavage, here she is at last night’s amfAR Inspiration Gala where she helped Dale and the other Rescue Rangers stop Fat Cat with a plane made out of a bleach bottle. People could hardly…

The Superficial | October 30, 2014 - 11:21 am

And Now A Moment For Whatever The Hell Miley Cyrus Is Wearing

I was going to let these pics stand by themselves because, we get it, Princess Twerklegum, Hannah Montana’s gone ratchet. But just for the record, it is getting crazy hard to tell Miley Cyrus and Justin Bieber apart. I made Photo Boy check every single one of these to make sure there isn’t a mop

The Superficial | July 15, 2013 - 12:39 pm

Miley Cyrus’ Parents Are Getting Divorced. For Real This Time.

Miley Cyrus’ parents have threatened to get a divorce before – No thanks to Hannah Montana, whoever the hell she is… – only to call the whole thing off, but this time Bret Michaels might want to delouse his finest wig and bandana because Tish Cyrus has officially filed papers. TMZ reports:


The Superficial | June 14, 2013 - 8:45 am

Noah Cyrus’ 13th Birthday Party Looks Appropriate

Ah, 13. That special age in a young girl’s life when her parents let her dress like a prostitute and rent an entire nightclub so everyone can get drunk. This is what makes our country great. This is why we’re great.
Photos: Pacific Coast News

The Superficial | January 10, 2013 - 1:58 pm

Miley Cyrus & Justin Bieber’s Moms Want Them To Make A Solid Gold Baby

Even though they’re apparently too late, Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus had a power lunch together yesterday, according to TMZ, where let’s not pretend they didn’t make plans to force their kids to bang thus creating a Canadian/Kentuckyian hybrid that shats syrup diamonds while hovering above the earth in search of fried taters because the…

The Superficial | November 16, 2012 - 1:15 pm

Miley Cyrus Got In A Dang Ol’ Bar Fight

In all the long, veiny, 100% beef, I’ve been a bad, bad secretary confusion yesterday, I missed the TMZ report that Miley Cyrus (Who’s 19, by the way.) is a battery suspect after getting into a fight at a Hollywood bar because it was only a matter of time until her life became The Dukes

The Superficial | September 11, 2012 - 3:30 pm

Miley Cyrus Needs A Dang Ol’ Tighter Dress, Man

Following up Tuesday’s dog and booby show, here’s Miley Cyrus prancing around Miami in a super-tight dress yesterday because she really wanted to be an advocate for curvier, real woman, but dangit, wouldn’t you know a gluten allergy came along and made her body all skinny and awesome. It’s like a curse.
Photos: Fame/Flynet, INFdaily,

The Superficial | May 17, 2012 - 10:55 am

Miley Cyrus Bikini Photos From Brazil

For the Lord doth heard my cries and madeth this day raineth over with bikinis, here’s Miley Cyrus vacationing in Rio today where she was forced to take bikini photos of Tish which explains all the salvia smoking and rampant vagina diddling. If my mom made me take bikini pictures of her, Navy SEALs would…

The Superficial | May 12, 2011 - 4:44 pm

Billy Ray Cyrus Calls Off Divorce

Presumably after another unsuccessful harvest at his taco and Corn Pops farm, Billy Ray Cyrus has called off his divorce to Tish and reconciled with Miley so he can refocus his efforts on planting a Lucky Charms tree. People reports:
“I’ve dropped the divorce,” Cyrus, 49, said during an interview on The View scheduled to…

The Superficial | March 18, 2011 - 11:36 am

Bret Michaels Denies Banging Miley’s Mom

“But first, blowjays for everyone! Yay! Believe what Bret says. Wheeeee!”
Bret Michaels stopped by Fox & Friends yesterday (above) where he personally denied having an affair with Tish Cyrus because the word of a man who meticulously hides his baldness is one to hang your toupee on. Via Popeater:
“The answer is no,” Michaels…

The Superficial | November 10, 2010 - 1:00 pm

Miley Cyrus Seems to Be Coping Well

(Well means catatonic, right?)
Here’s Miley Cyrus in LA last night where her still-17 mind appears to be having trouble processing her mom banging Bret Michaels. You know, in the midst of all the jokes and hilarity of watching rednecks cope with retarded amounts of money, we sometimes lose sight of what’s really happening here:…

The Superficial | November 4, 2010 - 11:30 am

Bret Michaels ‘Sabotaged His Career’ If He Slept With Miley’s Mom

Seen here pretending to be a stand-up family man to sell middle-aged fans his new reality show Life As I Know It, Bret Michaels’ career could suffer the consequences if it turns out he did the Unskinny Bop with Miley Cyrus’ mom Tish. (I hate myself so much right now.) Hollywood Life reports:
“First of…

The Superficial | November 3, 2010 - 3:12 pm

Bret Michaels Banged Miley Cyrus’ Mom

Presumably as payment for recording a duet with Miley on “Nothing to Lose,” Bret Michaels reportedly had an affair with Tish Cyrus which prompted Billy Ray to file for divorce once he eventually found out. (Why do I feel like I just described an episode of Dukes of Hazzard?) Us Weekly reports:
Michaels, 47, “became…

The Superficial | November 2, 2010 - 11:55 pm

Miley Cyrus’ Parents File For Divorce

This, uh. This explains a lot.
Billy Ray and Tish Cyrus are calling it quits after 17 years of marriage. There’s no talk of a third party, so to make this more scandalous, I’m going to say it’s Miley. People reports:
“As you can imagine, this is a very difficult time for our family,” they…

The Superficial | October 27, 2010 - 8:18 pm