The Hills


More The Hills stories

Heidi and Audrina’s breasts got cancelled

Civilization just became slightly less doomed. The Hills is going off the air after this season which essentially marks the end of Audrina Patridge and Heidi Montag’s careers, if that term even applies. Sure, they could fade away for a while, focus on their acting classes and try to land legitimate roles, but that’d… More »

Stephanie Pratt thinks she has a career

Stephanie Pratt apparently thinks it’ll be a smart move to quit The Hills, according to Hollyscoop:

Audrina Patridge has already scored her own reality show on MTV with Mark Burnett, so where does that leave Stephanie Pratt and Lo Bosworth?
“I think Audrina, Lo and I are all going to leave after these… More »

Doug Reinhardt shot down by The Hills

Looks like Doug Reinhardt is regretting Paris Hilton shitting on The Hills back in May. Much like he crawled back to Paris, he’s crawling back to his old stomping grounds who want nothing to do with him. And he works for free. Page Six reports:

Cast members of MTV’s “The Hills” were overheard… More »

Spencer Pratt admits ‘Hills’ is fake during hissy fit

While throwing a hissy fit shortly before quitting I’m a Celebrity…, Spencer Pratt essentially threw his gravy train The Hills under the bus, according to TMZ:

A well-placed source who works on the Costa Rican production of the show tells TMZ just before quitting the show, Spencer screamed at producers, “If you… More »

Paris Hilton shits on The Hills

Paris Hilton took a lanky swipe at Doug Reinhardt’s old show The Hills last night, according to Us Magazine:

“The show is, like, so lame and fake. He doesn’t even want to be a part of it,” Hilton told Wednesday at the Fifi Awards in NYC.
Lauren Conrad famously dumped Reinhardt on… More »

Whitney Port likes to be watched

Awesome news, America; Whitney Port’s new reality show, The City, premieres tonight, and she invites you all to watch it! For anyone hasn’t heard yet (hey, it’s the holidays; you’re forgiven), The City follows Hills alum Whitney Port as she weaves through New York and makes her mark on the fashion world. Which should be… More »

Brody Jenner says he’s not really all that gay

Apparently, when you star on a reality TV series that has you cruising for male companionship and you look like you spend more time than RuPaul in front of the mirror before leaving the house, certain misperceptions can develop among the general public. (The world can be so cruel.) Brody Jenner knows this (but, to… More »

Whitney Port has something City to say

Whitney Port is moving on from The Hills to spread her wings on her own show, The City (please, hold your tears; your grief can be expressed at, which will chronicle her adventures as she takes up in New York City. What will she do there? Judging from that thing that’s perched on… More »

David Letterman really starting to hate those Hills kids

David Letterman is growing visibly tired with having the “stars” of MTV’s The Hills on his show. Last night Lauren Conrad stopped by and you can tell Dave wasn’t in the sunshine up-the-ass blowing mood. Check out his comments:

On Lauren Conrad’s constant drama:
“That raises the question, maybe you’re the problem. You think? More »

Lauren Conrad might be out of a job

MTV’s ratings juggernaut The Hills may end after this season proving that perhaps there is a God after all. Turns out these jackasses, including the Laurens (above), are holding out for more money and fail to realize they could be easily replaced with chimps. Which would probably make the show exponentially more watchable. (Provided the… More »

Audrina Patridge started rumor about herself for publicity: FAIL

Because I love you guys I try to post about The Hills as little as possible. That being said, I always enjoy an opportunity to point out how ridiculously fake the show and everyone on it is. The latest “hot” rumor is that Lauren Conrad supposedly slept with Audrina Patridge’s on/off boyfriend Justin Bobby (I… More »

Charlize Theron is one of us

While doing press for her new movie Battle in Seattle, Charlize Theron told Josh Horowitz of that she can’t figure out why the hell people watch The Hills:

Theron: [Long pause, laughs.] So I watched a couple episodes. I was doing a world tour at the time, so I watched them in a… More »

Lauren Conrad writing teen fiction novels because kids today just aren’t vapid enough

Lauren Conrad, star of The Hills and the only person alive with the personality of oatmeal, has inked a three book deal with Harper Collins. Lauren will write a series of teen fiction novels called “L.A. Candy” which will mirror elements of her own life, according to the AP:

“I’ve always loved books that… More »

Heidi Montag is a ‘cheap’ whore, says fashion industry (I might’ve added the whore part)

In a glaring example the Apocalypse is at hand, The Hills is a hot commodity these days. Major fashion designers send thousands of dollars worth of clothing to Lauren Conrad and Audrina Patridge. However, Heidi Montag is left out of this circle of love because, obviously, she has the public persona of a… More »

Heidi Montag contemplates an upgrade

Yes, Heidi, you’ve got the right idea. This is definitely the way to finally get people to respect you as an artist. No foolin’. In the meantime after looking at these pictures, I gotta ask: Does no one carry a gun to the supermarket anymore? You can’t tell me there wasn’t some old lady packin’ More »

Spencer Pratt <3’s Jesus

Spencer Pratt wants everyone to know Jesus and him are “making the connection.” Not only that, but he’s taking spiritual advice from Heidi “I’d Rather Die Than Live Without Chest Balloons” Montag. You know, the chick who recently tried to pretend she’s a virgin. Holy art the assclowns. Scope out the Passion of… More »

Heidi Montag continues quest to make world’s shittiest pop music

Season 4 of the The Hills premieres tonight, and to further emphasize the continued decline of civilization, Heidi Montag has released a new single “Overdosin'” which sounds exactly like her previous single “Fashion”. I’m pretty sure Heidi Montag is just sitting in a recording booth saying words. No, scratch that. I don’t want to give… More »

Audrina Patridge makes $10K just to drink at a bar

In a giant “Fuck you!” to me from the universe, I’ve learned that Audrina Patridge of MTV’s The Hills gets paid $10,000 just to show up at clubs and drink. Nobody ever pays me to drink. Though somebody once tried to pay me not to drink. I told them to take their million bucks and… More »

Heidi Montag equates herself with Jesus

Heidi Montag is a devout Christian and wish people knew more about her faith. But you don’t hear much of that because she’s too busy posing in pictures that could only be used as Aryan greeting cards. But in between displaying her funbags, Heidi has a deep spiritual side that she shared with USA Today. More »

Heidi Montag excretes another single

In case there was any doubt that Heidi Montag has absolutely no musical talent whatsoever, she’s started her own label in an effort to get her album out there. In the meantime, Heid’s released another song called “Fashion” (audio after the jump). And let me tell you it’s every bit as amazing as you could… More »

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