Tan Mom


More Tan Mom stories

The Word Single Has Lost All Meaning


Fuck the entire world right in the face. Just right in it. … More »

Tan Mom Got Wasted At A Drag Show

It seems like only yesterday Tan Mom was the latest crazy mom to hate, lighting women’s hearts afire with another woman to feel superior over which, admittedly, is kind of hard to avoid if you’ve never shoved your five-year-old in a tanning bed. Anyway, like any true celebrity story that reaches dizzying heights, things eventually… More »

Tan Mom Wants To Do Playboy Now. I Swear To God, Hugh Hefner….

Just… goddammit, New Jersey.

If there’s anything this great country of ours has taught us, it’s that any type of publicity, even from reckless child endangerment, will immediately turn you into a celebrity who thinks she has a shot at Playboy which you will then immediately reject and/or be open to considering without… More »

Octomom’s Lecturing Tan Mom Now

As a rule of thumb, if the media’s already given you a nickname that ends in “mom,” your best is to keep your mouth shut and pray to God no one ever finds the bodies from your first attempt at child-rearing. Unfortunately, Tan Mom has practically been blood in the water for horrible moms looking… More »

Tan Mom Vs. Snooki: The Case For More Abortions

While I was a away last week drowning myself in a sea of pork barbecue sandwiches, calabash and homophobia in every direction (Vote May 8 to stop them faggots!), I couldn’t help myself from thinking, “Gosh, I hope the Internet finds a new crazy mom to hate.” And almost as if you heard the cries… More »