Posts tagged "Shia LaBeouf"

Shia LaBeouf Played The Slave Card

Shia LaBeouf says to be a celebrity, you must be an ‘enslaved body.’ *cracks knuckles* Let’s do this.

By: Photo Boy / April 21, 2015

Sia’s Sorry She Put Shia LaBeouf In A Cage With A Little Girl

“I’m about to have a twelve year-old’s crotch in my face, aren’t I? I’ve made a huge mistake.”

Posted by Photo Boy

Stop me if you’ve heard this one before. Shia LaBeouf did X, X was stupid and everyone went “Right, well, Shia LaBeouf is a crazy person, so…” This time’…

By: Photo Boy / January 9, 2015

Shia LaBeouf Claims He Was ‘Raped’ During His Performance Art Show

Thanks to Bill Cosby, there’s been a dialog happening about the credibility of rape accusers and how the trauma of the act itself along with societal stigmas can cause them to remain silent for years, if not decades, so what better time for Shia LaBeouf to claim that some dude’s girl totally couldn’t resist “raping”…

By: The Superficial / December 1, 2014

Shia LaBeouf’s A Metamodernist Christian Now

Posted by Photo Boy

If you’re wondering what the fuck that headline means, let me get the answer right out of the way. Nothing. It means absolutely nothing other than it’s one of the rambling, navel-gazing responses Shia LaBeouf mouth-farted to Interview Magazine during what felt like an endless diatribe on art, life,…

By: Photo Boy / October 22, 2014

Kiss The Hand of LaBeouf, You Child-Stealing Bitch! KISS IT!

And in that moment we all became Jon Bernthal. As did Jon Bernthal become all of us.

Amen.

I miss Music Tits, too. Shh, shh. It’s okay, it’s okay.

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Photo: Getty

By: The Superficial / October 15, 2014

Shia LaBeouf’s Drunk Butt-Touching Days Are Over

Posted by Photo Boy

Remember last week when the artist formerly known as the actor Shia LaBeouf went on Ellen to thoughtfully reflect on society’s shared existential void, which lead him to act out, in turn leading meanie meanheads to say mean things about him on the Internet? It could have been all…

By: Photo Boy / October 14, 2014

Shia LaBeouf Just Had An Existential Crisis, You Guys, He’s All Better

For roughly two years now, counting the Marilyn Manson and butterflies on his penis days, Shia LaBeouf has been a walking performance art twatwaffle who mostly was just plagiarizing anything he could get his hands on. Eventually all of that culminated in him being arrested at a Broadway performance of Cabaret for slapping people’s asses

By: The Superficial / October 10, 2014

No, No, No, Shia LaBeouf’s Penis And Other News

- Kristen Wiig might have banged Scott Speedman. [Lainey Gossip]

- Fran Drescher‘s new husband didn’t invent email by the way. [Dlisted]

- Future Lower Back Problems > Fantasy Football [theCHIVE]

- Miley Cyrus bought a hot glue gun and thinks she’s an artist now. [Fishwrapper]

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By: The Superficial / September 9, 2014

Guys, I’m Pretty Sure Megan Fox Wants To Bang Shia LaBeouf Again

Earlier in the week, Megan Fox made it a point to let the world know she’s not having sex with Brian Austin Green. On top of that, she made a passive aggressive jab that he wants more kids because “he doesn’t have to do any of the work” and then followed that up by naming…

By: The Superficial / August 8, 2014

Did Shia LaBeouf Know Too Much?

Now that Shia LaBeouf has been effectively discredited thanks to a month of terrorizing New York with piss and butt-grabbing, it’s time to ask the hard questions about how he’s definitely a victim of MK Ultra. It’s totally obvious. Which brings us to Vigilant Citizen, a blog dedicated to pointing out how every single music…

By: The Superficial / July 8, 2014

Shia LaBeouf Isn’t In Rehab, He’s In AA

Following his arrest for playing Marlboro Man Grab-Ass during a production of Cabaret, there were reports that Shia LaBeouf checked into rehab. Which apparently isn’t true, but his rep told TMZ he is attending AA meetings now making the real story here that Shia LaBeouf somehow has a rep. What the hell is that jo…

By: The Superficial / July 2, 2014

Shia LaBeouf Is Probably In Rehab

Following his arrest Thursday night, and the string of crazy preceding it, X17online reports Shia LaBeouf has checked into rehab. (Although, Gossip Cop says that hasn’t happened yet but is probably coming soon.) And as much as I shit on Shia, I can’t even imagine what it’s like coping with the fact that one minute…

By: The Superficial / July 1, 2014

Shia LaBeouf Is Just Crazy

When Shia LaBeouf was arrested for smoking and playing grab-ass during a production of Cabaret on Thursday, the prevailing theory was he was looking for attention the day before a new Transformers movie – the first without him in it – was released. Except, according to TMZ, it turns out Shia LaBeouf has been spending…

By: The Superficial / June 30, 2014

Shia LaBeouf Arrested For Smoking & Slapping People’s Asses During Broadway Show

If you somehow haven’t heard by now, Shia LaBeouf, now known only to himself as the “Bob DeNiro of Performance Art, Bitch,” was arrested last night for smoking and slapping people’s asses during a performance of Cabaret and reportedly hauled out in tears while handcuffed. A dramatic scene that apparently ended as soon as he…

By: The Superficial / June 27, 2014

Alec Baldwin Isn’t Famous Anymore

In case you haven’t heard by now, Alec Baldwin has dictated a lengthy essay to Vulture about his decision to quit public life because he met with the faggots, and he made nice with the faggots, but you faggots can’t seem to leave him alone to do important work helping you faggots out. Which i…

By: The Superficial / February 24, 2014

James Franco Likes What Shia LaBeouf’s Butt Is Cooking

*inhales deeply* “I’m getting notes of bean burrito, smoky broccoli tannins, a truly complex bouquet, you?”

Posted by Photo Boy

James Franco has not only entered Shia LaBeouf‘s fart cloud, he’s become one with it, grafting his very essence to it, farting it back out and inhaling it so deeply that…

By: Photo Boy / February 20, 2014

Shia LaBeouf Wanted To Wear A ‘Penis Cam’ For ‘Nymphomaniac’

While everyone’s squirting digital ink over Shia LaBeouf actually going through with his art exhibit he ripped off Marina Abramovic, here’s a story from the set of Nymphomaniac when he wasn’t trying to disguise his penchant for plagiarism with performance art bullshit and was more focused on the cinematic qualities of dick cameras. Page Six…

By: The Superficial / February 12, 2014

Shia LaBeouf Is A Douche In A Bag

Here’s Shia LaBeouf at the Berlin International Film Festival premiere of Nymphomaniac yesterday where he walked the red carpet with a bag over his head to cap off his earlier performance verite de fartsniffadeux of walking out of the Q&A after answering only one question with a plagiarized answer from French soccer player Eric Cantora‘…

By: The Superficial / February 10, 2014

Shia LaBeouf’s More Fartsniffer Than Man Now, Trollish And Doucheful

Continuing his desperate effort to prove he’s a bold, avant garde performance artist and not a serial plagiarist which he absolutely is, Shia LaBeouf is reportedly shopping around an art show to LA galleries that is exactly as pretentious and up-his-own-ass as you’d expect. Via THR:
One gallerist — who wishes to remain unnamed…

By: The Superficial / January 28, 2014

Shia LaBeouf Opened A Dialog About Plagiarism, So Really We Should Be Thanking Him

“Hello, I’m Dr. Cornelius Pubebeard. Welcome to Artistic D-bagging 101.”

Because Shia LaBeouf can’t go five minutes without the digital equivalent of flailing his arms around and yelling, “Hey, hey, look at me! I arted!” he went on another Twitter tirade last night. Only this time instead of retiring, he did exactly what…

By: The Superficial / January 22, 2014
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