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Is That A Painting of Jon Hamm Eating Vagina? Why Yes It Is

Jon Hamm performing cunnilingus is here for you, ladies. More »


Are You Banging A Guy Named Ryan? You’re Probably Pregnant

Blake Lively and Eva Mendes are pregnant as is the trend these days. More »


Hey Girl, Ryan Gosling Wants Your Eggs Cage-Free

Ryan Gosling wants the eggs at Costco to not be mass-produced for cheap consumption. Could he be more adorable? More »


Stop Asking Serious Artist Baby Goose To Be ‘Sexiest Man Alive,’ Girl

Posted by Photo Boy

Yesterday, we spent some time considering whether or not Thor could get us off harder than any other chiseled actor, and today, we’ll spend even more time thinking about one of the guys who didn’t get that honor. I want to make it perfectly clear that when we’re casually… More »


Ryan Gosling And Some Whore You Hate Just Had A Baby Girl

Congratulations, a wax statue gets laid more than all of us now.

Ryan Gosling was totally going to marry you, but then Eva Mendes threw her slut pussy onto his erect penis while he was trying to send you a romantic dick pic. – WHORE! – So now Us Weekly reports they’re the… More »


Eva Mendes Ryan Gosling Baby Pregnant

“What is that? Some sort of SEO shit?”
“Why’s her name first?”

If you somehow haven’t had it screamed into your face now, twin bullshit factories Star and OK! Magazine are both reporting Eva Mendes is seven months pregnant with Ryan Gosling’s baby. Which might actually be true, according to Lainey Gossip,… More »


Bertney And The Baby Goose

Bertney And The Baby Goose
by Shel Silverstein

Bertney liked being on radio shows. They always had her favorite candy while she waited. But Bertney didn’t like when her publicist made her remember answers while she was trying to eat her candy.
“These words don’t fit in my brain,” Bertney would
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