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Katy Perry & Selena Gomez Love Each Other And Want To Get Married

So that whole Orlando Bloom cheating on Katy Perry with Selena Gomez thing worked itself out.

Mike Redmond |

Orlando Bloom Probably Cheated On Katy Perry With Selena Gomez

Orlando Bloom allegedly cheated on Katy Perry with Selena Gomez, because his life is lightyears better than any of us can imagine.

Carmen Ribecca |

And Now Chris Pratt Remembering Every Word From Eminem’s Verse In ‘Forgot About Dre’

While I did stupid shit like go to college, Chris Pratt spent the early 2000s living in a van in Maui where he smoked weed all day and listened to Eminem. And if you think I’m being sarcastic, I sit in a basement writing about famous tits while Chris Pratt’s basically Space Robert Downey Jr.

Mike Redmond |

And Now It’s Time To Play ‘How Many Kardashians Did Justin Bieber Bang?’

After the Orlando Bloom incident which apparently all started after Leonardo DiCaprio “flicked” Justin Bieber away, the little shit should be a social pariah for all intents and purposes. But then again, he technically still has money, so naturally the Kardashians not only talked Kanye West into convincing his lover Riccardo Tisci to invite Bieber…

Mike Redmond |

Justin Bieber’s Still F*cking With Orlando Bloom

catwolf9899’s good people.

Justin Bieber is a little bitch. Which is really all the introduction I need here, but just in case, here are new details from his brush-up with Orlando Bloom that, just like earlier accounts, still involve him making a smartass remark about Miranda Kerr only this time there’s a cameo…

Mike Redmond |

Justin Bieber Pissed Off Legolas By Bragging About Miranda Kerr

Now that Orlando Bloom is the hero the Internet deserves, but not the one it needs right now, here’s what prompted him to take a swing at a lesbian rapper early this morning, according to Page Six:

“Justin was at one table, and Orlando was at another,” a source told us. “But when…

Mike Redmond |

Orlando Bloom Took A Swing At Justin Bieber

Seen here partying his dick off in Spain, Orlando Bloom reportedly took a swing at Justin Bieber Wednesday morning Ibiza time causing the hardest rapper in all of Canada-land to flee a restaurant because of the prettiest elf in Middle Earth. And to the applause of every single person there if not humanity at large.

Mike Redmond |

Justin Bieber Wrote A Sizzurp Carol

Posted by Photo Boy

For the past few days I’ve been meaning to run this set of Selena Gomez getting herself drunk enough to revenge bang Orlando Bloom’s greasy little elf dick, but I kept getting distracted. So, what better time than now, as we celebrate the release of Justin Bieber’s new song…

Carmen Ribecca |

Selena Gomez Is Banging Orlando Bloom

Considering Miranda Kerr cheated on Orlando Bloom with Justin Bieber, it seems only fair that he’d get to bang Selena Gomez, and so he is much to the dismay of #BBare. Via Hollywood Life:

Justin Bieber, 20, is furious over Selena Gomez, 21, allegedly flirting with Orlando Bloom. The Biebs is used to…

Mike Redmond |

Lindsay Lohan’s Client List Just Got Bigger

Last week, In Touch published a handwritten list of celebrities that Lindsay Lohan had sex with because she’s broke and will do anything for money. Except part of the list was blurred out for reasons that can now be described as milking the fuck out of this thing because here’s the next batch:

Mike Redmond |

Justin Bieber Broke Up Miranda Kerr & Orlando Bloom? The Justin Bieber?

It’s pretty much a given that Justin Bieber banged Barbara Palvin after The 2012 Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show, but now comes word that he probably also had sex with Miranda Kerr because Justice Scalia was right. The devil is real, and he is doing something besides making pigs run off cliffs. It’s this, he’s doing…

Mike Redmond |

Miranda Kerr Is Single

We’re still two months away from the Baby Jesus’ birthday, and yet he’s already bestowed a gift upon us by breaking up Miranda Kerr and Legolas even though we kind of murdered his ass then went, “Haha, remember all that stuff he said about poor people? Fuck that.” E! News reports:
A rep for…

Mike Redmond |

‘The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug’ Has A Trailer

Here’s the first trailer for The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug which looks like it’ll be exactly like The Hobbit right down to the epic battle scenes, gorgeous landscapes and expanded Tolkien lore all punctuated with random slapstick that kills the whole movie dead. So if you really want to sell me on this one,…

Mike Redmond |

Miranda Kerr’s In A Bikini, Clearly Hates Jesus

Because a woman’s body is her husband’s property – After two years of bringing in sweet Victoria’s Secret checks, of course. – here’s the godless Jezebel Miranda Kerr flaunting her carnal treasures in Australia so that men may become filled with lust and spill their seed upon the ground thus fertilizing Satan’s subterranean army which…

Mike Redmond |

Miranda Kerr Named Her Son After Her Ex

In case there were any doubts on who wears the cleavage-pants in Miranda Kerr and Orlando Bloom’s relationship, she apparently named their son after her ex-boyfriend because who doesn’t like having a constant reminder of the guy who used to bang your wife around? Frankly, I prefer it. Via Us Magazine:

Born on…

Mike Redmond |

Jon & Kate Plus Televised Marriage Counseling

- Jon & Kate Gosselin are letting TLC tape their marriage counseling sessions. You know what they should tape? The child support hearings. Mostly because I’ve always wanted to see the look of a man forced to pay $1 million/month and wear a court-ordered condom for the rest of his life. [Jezebel]

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Mike Redmond |

Orlando Bloom & Miranda Kerr ain’t nothin’ but mammals

Miranda Kerr and Orlando Bloom decided to show the world how two beautiful people make-out yesterday. Funny, this is absolutely nothing like the way I do it. Unless there was an exchange of money beforehand then, yeah, they pretty much nailed it.

Photos: Flynet

Mike Redmond |

Orlando Bloom is expanding his range

Here are some shots of Orlando Bloom sporting tattoos all over his body and walking around topless in leather pants. And yeah, sure, I guess I could mention he’s on the set of some movie, but then you probably wouldn’t believe me when I tell you this is how he spends all his Fridays. Because…

Superficial |
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