Noah Cyrus


More Noah Cyrus stories

Noah Cyrus Is A Thing Now, There Is… Another… Mulletspawn…

There’s another Cyrus, and she’s already doing vagina things. God help us. More »

Miley Cyrus: ‘Noah Is My P*ssy Police’

If it seems like Miley Cyrus has been spending an awful lot of time with her 14-year-old sister Noah lately, it’s because she’s in charge of making sure Miley’s vagina is ready to be shown to as many as possible with a leotard violently wedged up in it. Haha! And you worked at Dairy Queen… More »

Noah Cyrus Never Stood A Chance

If someone were to ask me who’s more hopelessly doomed: Noah Cyrus or Kendall and Kylie Jenner, my first response would be to shoot them in the teeth for asking me about work past 9 a.m. and be perfectly justified in doing so. #Merica After that, I’d eventually give it some thought before realizing fucked… More »

Noah Cyrus’ 13th Birthday Party Looks Appropriate

Ah, 13. That special age in a young girl’s life when her parents let her dress like a prostitute and rent an entire nightclub so everyone can get drunk. This is what makes our country great. This is why we’re great.

Photos: Pacific Coast NewsMore »

Miley Cyrus Don’t Need No Dang Ol’ Pants To Love That There Honey Boo Boo Child

Seen here dressin’ all fancy like in her skivvy-peepers showin’ that there young’n child how the Debbil’s Holiday ain’t just an excuse to say “spooks” without the librul gummint puttin’ it’s desegremagation upon us, Miley Cyrus went on the gargoyle wermen’s TV box show and said she can’t get enough of that danngone Honey BooMore »

Billy Ray Cyrus approves of Miley’s lap dance

Because he’s already got his solid gold terlet, Billy Ray Cyrus doesn’t see anything wrong with his teenage daughter provocatively dancing against a 44-year-old man. Via PopEater:

The video shows openly gay Shankman grinding up against Cyrus with a drink in hand. It was even reported that several people left the party after… More »

The Cyrus Family takes another step closer to becoming The Spears Family

This is a video of nine-year-old Noah Cyrus dancing like a midget stripper to Akon’s “Smack That” to the amusement of everyone backstage at a recent Miley Cyrus show. What’s even more fucked up is Miley’s people felt this would be hilarious to post on her official website which might as well… More »