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Michelle Rodriguez’s Pubes, Anyone?

This is a post about Michelle Rodriguez’s pubes. Let it happen.

Mike Redmond |

Today, We Are All Michelle Rodriguez

I’m not exactly sure how this stops global warming, but I’m willing to give it a shot. For the children.

Mike Redmond |

Michelle Rodriguez Partied With Boner Boy Again

Michelle Rodriguez parties in a bikini with her old pal Boner Boy. They’re like two peas in a pod!

Mike Redmond |

Michelle Rodriguez & Zac Efron Broke Up

And just as soon as it began, Michelle Rodriguez and Zac Efron’s relationship is already over, so assume the whole thing went exactly like this: “Oh. Sniff. Hey. Sniff. Oh. You like coke? Sniff. Yeah. Cool. Sniff. Oh, shit, we’re fucking? Uh uh uh. Sniff. Yeah! Sniff. Backflips, yeah, backflips! Let’s do ‘em! WHOO! Sniff.

Mike Redmond |

Good Morning, Michelle Rodriguez, And Other News

- Captain America made Batman flinch. [Lainey Gossip]

- Blake Lively won’t let Martha Stewart stop her, so someone should probably tell her about the drone. [Dlisted]

- Hot Girls With Messy Rooms [theCHIVE]

– Oh, good, James Franco and Lana Del Rey were in the same room. Wonderful.

Mike Redmond |

Justin Bieber’s With Michelle Rodriquez Now

Presumably because Zac Efron lacked too many of the soft, feminine features Michelle Rodriguez desires in a mate (Read: Vagina. He didn’t have a vagina.), here’s Justin Bieber partying with her in Ibiza yesterday because fucking with other people’s exes has been going great for him so far. Then again, TMZ says he’s actually there…

Mike Redmond |

Michelle Rodriguez & Zac Efron Party Together, No Big Whoop, Wanna Fight About It?

Photo Boy had the top shot in The Crap We Missed yesterday, and now here’s the rest of Michelle Rodriguez partying with Zac Efron in Sardinia which seems random until you remember she was just hanging out with Boner Boy, so literally anything’s possible. The important thing is that this proves Zac Efron’s either a…

Mike Redmond |

Michelle Rodriguez Doing Backflips In A Bikini

The last post was kind of a (Robert) downer (Jr.) – Kill me. Break into my house and kill me. – so here’s Michelle Rodriguez drinking and doing backflips off a yacht in Sardinia. And without the presence of Boner Boy or Cara Delevingne who never understood her passion for falling recklessly off a sea…

Mike Redmond |

Vin Diesel’s Lost Without Paul Walker

“Haha, remember when I quit after the first one because I thought I was going to be a giant movie star then came back and agreed to do 20 more? Haha, remember that?”
“Yeah, Vin, I remember.”

You might think of The Fast And Furious franchise as nothing more than cars going…

Mike Redmond |

Michelle Rodriguez In A Bikini With Boner Boy? Yup, It’s The Apocalypse

There’ve been rumors that Michelle Rodriguez and Cara Delevingne have broken up, but what none of those rumors mentioned is that Michelle spent the weekend hanging out with an all grow’d up Boner Boy making this the most random and incredible rebound in the history of the world. Mostly because you never see a couple…

Mike Redmond |

Michelle Rodriguez’s Bitches Swim Topless

“Can I put my top back on?”
“If you want to wait in the car.”

Now that they’ve announced their love to the world, here’s Michelle Rodriguez and Cara Delevingne in Cancun over the weekend where one of them swam topless in the ocean instead of getting a dog, so none of…

Mike Redmond |

Michelle Rodriguez Is Banging Cara Delevingne

Presumably because Vin Diesel always talks about cars when they do it, or she has amnesia again (Damn your undercover missions, Paul Walker. DAMN THEM TO HELL.), Michelle Rodriguez confirmed to The Mirror that she’s dating Cara Delevingne. Which is cool, it’s 2014. Lesbians be free to lesbianate. I’m just concerned with what happened to…

Mike Redmond |

Good Morning, Michelle Rodriguez, And Other News

- Madonna owned the MET Gala: An argument I wouldn’t make because I’m easily distracted by breasts. And the living. [Lainey Gossip]

- Lauryn Hill’s going to jail for tax evasion. [Dlisted]

– Apparently Playmate of the Year Claire Sinclair looks incredible without makeup. [theCHIVE]

– There’s going to…

Mike Redmond |

Michelle Rodriguez in a Bikini:
The Crap I Missed – Monday 4.29.13

I’m sure you guys have gathered that I’m filling in for Fish while he’s “whistlin’ dixie” or whatever the southern phrase is for discreetly checking out boardshort bulges from behind aviators. Something about bumps on a log? I don’t know, I went to college. Anyway, there won’t be any genuine The Crap We Missed posts…

Carmen Ribecca |

Michelle Rodriguez Understands The Oscars

Apparently it’s Characters From LOST Say Whatever The Fuck They Want Day, because here’s Michelle Rodriguez explaining to Vulture why Nicole Kidman won’t win an Oscar solely for peeing on Zac Efron even though she clearly should. So right off the bat you can tell this was a sober conversation:

As for those…

Mike Redmond |

And Now For The Part of Cannes Where Michelle Rodriguez Wears A Bikini And Jumps Off Things

Here’s Michelle Rodriguez at Eden Roc where she stays every year for Cannes because she’s a bisexual spider-monkey who constantly dives off shit. Also, they let her jump on top of cars as they pull up so people can feed her grapes through a cracked window. “Ha, look, honey, she’s grabbing your tit. We loved…

Mike Redmond |

Hey! Take Yo’ Gotdamn Shoes Off Before You Get On Diddy’s Boat

You and I live boring, conventional lives where getting invited over to someone’s house and being asked to remove our shoes is generally accepted because we all know shampooing carpets takes fucking forever. Also, shoes are violent oppressors whose shackles I’ve long since escaped, you toesy-restricting bastards. Anyway, when someone like Diddy throws a lavish…

Mike Redmond |

Michelle Rodriguez is Banging The Dos Equis Guy

“Aye chi-papi, are those man balls? I must stop drinking the beer.”

Here’s Michelle Rodriguez and her new boyfriend Gianluca Vacchi who, okay, isn’t the Dos Equis guy, but only because he’s the Italian Santa Claus. “I bringa you a present ina my sack. (That’sa my sex joke.)” The important thing is she’s…

Mike Redmond |

Michelle Rodriguez Wore a Bikini Again

Here’s Michelle Rodriguez in Spain today where she managed to keep her butt crack in check making me immediately question the importance/necessity of these photos. While my need for pageviews says, “Berkinis!” my heart whispers, “No ass crack?” as it looks forlornly out the window, a solitary tear trailing slowly down its left ventricle.

Mike Redmond |
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