Posts tagged "Lindsay Lohan"

Lindsay Lohan: ‘Shaking People’s Hands Is Community Service’

Lindsay Lohan is in deep shit after submitting progress reports that count meet and greets with fans as community service and include dates that put her in two places at once.
By: The Superficial / January 28, 2015

Lindsay Lohan Has Photoshop? What Makes You Say That?

Lindsay Lohan poses in her Calvins on Instagram because it helps fight off the mosquito virus or whatever Mr. Coke told her that morning for breakfast. The situation's fluid.
By: The Superficial / January 26, 2015

Lindsay Lohan’s ‘Virus’ Is Excuse To Get Out Of Jail, And There It Is

In a shocking turn of events, Lindsay Lohan's mosquito virus bullshit turned out to be a lie to get out of completing her court-ordered community service. Will the judge give her an extension? Will she land back in jail? Will she blow someone, anyone to make this all go away or for cash or drugs? …
By: Photo Boy / January 23, 2015

Lindsay Lohan Can’t Walk Because She Has A Virus, You Guys

Shortly before New Year’s, Lindsay Lohan was trolling for attention by saying she caught some sort of rare tropical mosquito virus. Now, she can't walk and totally had to go to the hospital who kicked her ass right back out.
By: The Superficial / January 21, 2015

Lindsay Lohan’s Doing A Super Bowl Commercial

Lindsay Lohan once hit a baby while behind the wheel, so who better to be the face of car insurance than a prominent drug addict who's been arrested for DUI twice and one time with a hostage? Just don't ask her about full tort. She'll think you're talking about something else, …
By: The Superficial / January 19, 2015

Giada De Laurentiis’ Breasts Are Single: Your Happy Post Of The Day

It's the holidays, so here's some shit to make you smile even though this little meter I'm looking at says all of you are staring into Jessie Nizewitz's baby chute right now. I literally don't have to do anything the rest of the day. 1. Giada De Laurentiis is …
By: The Superficial / December 30, 2014

And Now Here’s Lindsay Lohan’s Sad Video

While Emily Ratajkowski's LOVE Advent 2014 video awakened me on a spiritual and emotional level by making me realize that, yes, I absolutely would have a threeway with a panda, Lindsay Lohan's is a sad, depressing look at the futility of life. Her breasts were so big, and yet everything about …
By: The Superficial / December 17, 2014

Lindsay Lohan’s Crotch Will Sell You Clothes Now

If there's one constant that stops Lindsay Lohan from swallowing a bunch of pills and not waking up in the morning, it's that Earth drugs can't kill her now. But if there's another constant, it's that some idiot somewhere is waiting to hand her money for some stupid project that will …
By: The Superficial / December 4, 2014

Lindsay Lohan Thinks She’s Poised For A Hollywood Comeback

Posted by Photo Boy Lindsay Lohan's starring run in Speed-the-Plow will end November 29th, but before she heads back to the states finally giving England a change to delouse their capitol city, she's of course already talking about how successful her career's about to be. Via Radar Online: “Lindsay is doing …
By: Photo Boy / November 21, 2014

It’s The Tenth Anniversary Of The Last Time Lindsay Lohan Was Relevant

Thanks to Lindsay Lohan being Lindsay Lohan, everyone already knew Entertainment Weekly was doing a Mean Girls reunion story, and now that day has come. Below's a link if you're so inclined to read such highlights as Lindsay Lohan bitching about Hilary Duff to poor Tina Fey …
By: The Superficial / November 5, 2014

Lindsay Lohan’s Being Sued For $60 Million

So remember when Lindsay Lohan and her brother stole that dude's app? He actually thinks he's getting $60 million out of them. C'mon, she's not sucking that many dicks. -- Is she? Page Six reports: Actress Lindsay Lohan’s younger brother, once the scandal-scarred clan’s white sheep, is facing a …
By: The Superficial / October 31, 2014

Lindsay Lohan Is Super Deep, You Guys

Over the weekend, Lindsay Lohan appeared on The Jonathan Ross Show with Russell Brand who she's apparently trying to impress now by dropping deep quotes about capitalism on Instagram. In her bra: "We swim in the aquarium of capitalism." As for where that's from, I have no …
By: The Superficial / October 27, 2014

‘Brazilian Candidate? Look At Me Topless In My Underwear!’

Yesterday, Lindsay Lohan was all over the place after she tweeted then untweeted an endorsement for a Brazilian presidential candidate with ties to cocaine smuggling because of course. So what quicker way to change the subject than by posting a topless photo of yourself to Instagram? Which might work …
By: The Superficial / October 23, 2014

Lindsay Lohan Endorses Brazilian Politician With Chopper Full of Coke

In a now-deleted tweet, Lindsay Lohan endorsed Brazilian presidential candidate Aécio Neves yesterday because if there's one person the people of South America look to for political advice, it's Roja Diabla de la Whitenose, Holy Mother of DongBongs. And now for the part about coke because of course this is about …
By: The Superficial / October 22, 2014

Lindsay & The Amazing Technicolor Dream Nipple

Here's Lindsay Lohan at the after-party for the opening night of "Speed-the-Plow" where she managed to only forget one line and was deemed "competent without being exciting." Which is pretty fucking amazing for Lindsay Lohan considering not a single review contained the words, "And then she tried …
By: The Superficial / October 3, 2014

Lindsay Lohan’s ‘Mean Girls’ Sequel Sounds Familiar

Seen here getting ready to spin her head around while screaming, "Let Jesus fuck you. Let him fuck you!" after blowing her first performance of "Speed-the-Plow," Lindsay Lohan recently told Time Out London that she pitched Tina Fey a sequel to Mean Girls because, seriously, what else …
By: The Superficial / September 25, 2014

Coroner: Lindsay Lohan Never Touched Whitney Houston’s Body Bag

In a new interview with The Telegraph, Lindsay Lohan claimed she handled Whitney Houston's body bag during her court-ordered community service at the LA County morgue. Which obviously never happened because Lindsay Lohan said it did, but just for fun, here's the coroner's office pointing out how completely full of shit she …
By: The Superficial / September 16, 2014

Lindsay Lohan’s Stealing Apps Now

Lindsay Lohan will steal anything that isn't nailed down, and even then, there's still a 50/50 chance she'll melt through the nail with her freckle acid. But I'm not here to talk science, I'm here to talk about Lindsay stealing some dude's idea for an app and getting sued into next …
By: The Superficial / September 8, 2014

Once You Get Lindsay Lohan, There’s No Cure

Yesterday was Throwback Thursday, and if you have no idea what Throwback Thursday is, it's the day of the week when I find out how many of my Facebook friends have way too many old pictures and free time on their hands. On that note, here's Lindsay Lohan's contribution which reminds …
By: The Superficial / September 5, 2014

Wait. Lindsay Lohan Is A Nanny?

"Call me Mrs. Crotchfire." I would've posted this sooner, but a gaping vagina and 18 server crashes will fuck a man's schedule up, so here's In Touch Weekly reporting that not only is Lindsay Lohan "dating" an investment banker, she's also taking care of his kids who presumably don't have a …
By: The Superficial / August 26, 2014
Page 1 of 63