Posts tagged "John Mayer"

Giada De Laurentiis Denies Banging Every Guy She’s Ever Been On TV With

Posted by Photo Boy Star magazine would publish a cover photo of you in a coffin if they thought you'd buy it, so it's not a stretch to think when they heard Giada De Laurentiis' was getting divorced they went "Okay, let's start with 'she fucked everyone,' then work our way backwards from there." Via…

By: Photo Boy / January 8, 2015

Katy Perry’s Banging John Mayer Again

Posted by Photo Boy Knowing exactly how to kick a year in its balls while it's down, Katy Perry's letting the Prince of Douche touch her huge boobs again, because everything is bad. IT'S ALL RUINED! *slaps Fish's tray to floor, runs out of cafeteria* Via Daily Mail: Apparently aware of keeping things under wraps,…

By: Photo Boy / January 6, 2015

Katherine Heigl Used John Mayer’s Penis To Get Engaged

I stand by that headline entirely. Posted by Photo Boy John Mayer's penis has done all sorts of reckless shit. It went crazy after being in Jessica Simpson and made him say the n-word. It refused to marry Taylor Swift after they did it under the bleachers. It even dumped Katy Perry. The Katy Perry…

By: Photo Boy / November 25, 2014

Taylor Swift Is Writing Songs About Katy Perry Now

Taylor Swift's schtick used to be writing songs about jerk boys who didn't make every single date like The Notebook. But she's evolved as an artist (and a woman... nope, that wasn't creepy) and has moved on to writing songs about other pop stars who steal her roadies or some stupid bullshit. I honestly don't…

By: The Superficial / September 9, 2014

Katy Perry Really Knows How To Make Men Jealous

Following up her decision to bang Riff Raff, Katy Perry continued her "Fuck You (For More Than Likely Cheating On Me With Kelly Monaco), John Mayer" tour over the weekend by telling E! News she plans to become a green-haired collector of fine arts, and, no, this is not an April Fool's Joke. Switching Photo…

By: The Superficial / April 1, 2014

Katy Perry’s Banging Riff Raff, Suck It, John Mayer

Continuing her trend of letting questionable men see her giant tits naked, Katy Perry is apparently dating Riff Raff now. And who the hell's Riff Raff? The real life version of James Franco's character in Spring Breakers, so you'd assume Katy Perry would keep something like this a secret except she's bragging about it o…

By: The Superficial / March 27, 2014

Katy Perry Dumped John Mayer

"AAAAAHHHHHHHH." "Yeah, we're still not getting married." Over the past few weeks, there's been rumor after rumor about Katy Perry getting engaged to John Mayer except now E! News is reporting she dumped his ass which I'm sure had nothing to do with a press campaign to box him into proposing. Guys love that: A…

By: The Superficial / February 26, 2014

John Mayer Tells Katy Perry How To Sing Now

Katy Perry and John Mayer did their first interview as a couple on GMA yesterday to promote their duet "Who You Love." A move they should probably never do again unless they want people to know just how much John Mayer hates Katy Perry and is only having sex with her for her tits. Which…

By: The Superficial / December 18, 2013

John Mayer Wrote A Song About Taylor Swift

John Mayer threw a hissy fit when Taylor Swift wrote "Dear John' about him because writing songs about your ex is bush league. Except at some point when he should've been spending every waking minute suffocating between Katy Perry's breasts, he decided to get Taylor back by writing his own song about her, according to…

By: The Superficial / June 19, 2013

Katy Perry Takes Her Giant Breasts Hiking Because John Mayer Thinks She’s Fat

One of the rumors floating around about why Katy Perry and John Mayer broke up is that he thought she was getting fat which might explain why she spent all Easter weekend hiking. Except that's bullshit because I can barely see Katy Perry in these photos. In fact, I'm almost positive this is a broomstick.

By: The Superficial / April 2, 2013

Katy Perry & John Mayer Broke Up. Again.

"My penis found out you're friends with Rihanna. I'm so sorry." Despite, or possibly because of, all that marriage talk in Rolling Stone last month, Katy Perry and John Mayer broke up again, according to Us Weekly: "It's sad," one pal tells Us, but cautions that it might not be a permanent break. "It's not…

By: The Superficial / March 20, 2013

‘Thanks For The Giant Boobs, Katy Perry. Here’s The Shittiest Ring You’ve Ever Seen In Your Life.’

Here's the ring John Mayer gave Katy Perry on Valentine's Day that many have speculated is an engagement ring because he's a douche and only a douche would propose with the Care Bears submarine. If you twist the top it probably plays "Your Body is A Wonderland" while Jennifer Love Hewitt cries alone in the…

By: The Superficial / February 20, 2013

Katy Perry Is The Only Two Things That Mattered At The Grammys. The Only Two Things.

If you follow The Superficial on Facebook and Twitter, then you have a ginormously long penis and already knew to skip the Grammys and wait patiently for pics of Katy Perry's giant breasts because they're the only thing worthwhile that happened. Don't get me wrong, I'm still going to post stupid shit like Chris Brown

By: The Superficial / February 10, 2013

Katy Perry’s Breasts Domesticated John Mayer

"Ha! Play pinochle with you again? This old rascal." In a new interview with Rolling Stone that I inexplicably read in its entirety, a more mellow, less douchey (for him anyway) John Mayer opens up about the past two years of his life not touring because of a granuloma in his throat which apparently involve…

By: The Superficial / February 1, 2013

Katy Perry & John Mayer Are Banging Too Loud

In case it wasn't bad enough that Katy Perry's having sex with John Mayer, they're now doing it so loud her neighbors are starting to get pissed. Via Hollywood Life: Katy Perry apparently had trouble satisfying Russell Brand’s wild sexual urges, but John Mayer certainly isn’t complaining! Instead, it’s Katy’s West Hollywood neighbors who are…

By: The Superficial / October 24, 2012

Katy Perry’s Brother Says She Hasn’t Found ‘The One’ Yet, Explains These John Mayer Pics

HIM: Aw, yeah, it's my birthday. Totally getting laid tonight. HER: Goddammit, is that a bowtie? Uterus self-clean, ACTIVATE. Despite looking incredibly thrilled to be celebrating John Mayer's birth-douche-day last night, Katy Perry's brother says she still hasn't found "the one" yet because it'll have to be someone who's changing the world just like she…

By: The Superficial / October 17, 2012

Katy Perry & John Mayer Got Back Together Already

"Not on my watch!" - Lex Luthor When we last left Katy Perry and John Mayer, word was out that he dumped her over email which made total sense because John Mayer's a douche. Turns out, Katy likes being used as an easily-discarded penis-punching bag because the two were spotted at a music festival together

By: The Superficial / September 5, 2012

John Mayer Dumped Katy Perry Over Email

For reasons I'll never fully understand, women get all emotional whenever you tell them you really aren't as into them as you pretended to be to talk them into sex which makes it awkward to at least have the courtesy to break up with them in person. Then again, it's not like there's a law…

By: The Superficial / August 29, 2012

Katy Perry Was Falling In Love With John Mayer, So He Dumped Her

If you're still on the edge of your seat wondering why Katy Perry and John Mayer stopped having drunk sex with each other, according to People, she started having feelings for him which he apparently didn't think was a big enough opening to touch more of her breasts by stringing her along. Romance is dead:…

By: The Superficial / August 27, 2012

John Mayer Finally Got A Haircut

STYLIST: So how far did looking like Johnny Depp's autistic brother Howie getcha? JOHN: Katy Perry, believe it or not. STYLIST: No shit? So back to looking like a douche? JOHN: Douche it. I'll fight anyone to the death who says that's not exactly how that conversation happened. Photos: NGRE/AKM-GSI

By: The Superficial / August 27, 2012
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