Joe Simpson


More Joe Simpson stories

Now Joe Simpson Is Wasted

It’s Papa Joe’s turn to make an ass out of himself. Let’s see how he does. More »

Nick Lachey Doesn’t Miss ‘Playing Grab-Ass’ With Joe Simpson

Nick Lachey was on Watch What Happens Live last night where during a round of “Plead The Fifth” Andy Cohen asked him what’s the best thing about not having Joe Simpson as a father-in-law anymore? While his brother Drew had a more broad answer, Nick went right for the jugular or whatever that vein on… More »

Jessica Simpson’s Mom Was Literally Going To Shoot Her Dad After He Came Out of The Closet

So Jessica Simpson’s mom Tina allegedly wrote a suicide note spelling out her intentions to shoot Joe Simpson then herself shortly after he came out of the closet and filed for divorce, according to RadarOnline:

Shortly before traveling to New York to confront Joe, 52, about his tryst with 21-year-old model Bryce Chandler… More »

Papa Joe & Eric Johnson in ‘The Bike Ride’

“Wouldcha feel better if I pretended to love Jessica’s big ol’ double D’s again?”
*pedals into traffic*

Photos: INFdailyMore »

See? Jessica & Ashlee Simpson Didn’t Choose Sides In Their Parent’s Divorce

As their parents battle through a nasty divorce that may or may not be because Papa Joe has been gay this whole time (It was.), rumors were circulating that Jessica and Ashlee were choosing sides and not speaking to each other. Except here’s the two of them promoting Jessica’s new clothing line together, so clearly… More »

Joe Simpson Looks Like This Now

Last week, rumors surfaced that Jessica Simpson’s dad Papa Joe has been a closeted homosexual this whole time, except here he is looking straight as can be on Friday. Because if there’s one thing us red-blooded, heterosexual male can’t get enough of, it’s making ourselves look like Ellen DeGeneres. Which is actually true in my… More »

Jessica Simpson’s Dad Was Gay This Whole Time

What? This guy? Get outta here.

Years ago, I had a roommate who was a flamingly gay ballerina that I worked with at Applebee’s who used to spend 75% of his shift running around screaming “TITTIES!” while grabbing every chick in the restaurant’s breasts. A series of events I should’ve remembered each time… More »

Jessica Simpson’s Dad Arrested For DUI

“That’s right, titty. Keep poking ol’ Joe in the side. He don’t mind…”

Jessica Simpson’s dad Papa Joe was apparently picked up for DUI over the weekend, according to TMZ, which probably explains why she’s been tweeting about her weight all week and dangling it in front of the media like a deep-fried… More »

Jessica Simpson Wants $500K To Confirm The Pregnancy You’re Looking Right At

The poster said Jessica would sign autographs until 2:30, but at 1:15 her mouth suddenly opened and stayed that way until she walked into a backroom. Later, we heard what could only be described as a family of elks getting beat with a chair followed by cries for barbecue sauce. It was my most favoritestMore »

Ashlee Simpson’s in a Bikini

Under the watchful, always watchful eyes of Papa Joe, the whole Simpson clan slipped down to Mexico for a little family vacay over the weekend where Ashlee brought her new boyfriend and pranced around in a bikini as Jessica hid under a poncho. Not so much out of shame, as much as she had pork… More »

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