Posts tagged "Jail"

Screech Ducks Felony Charge For Stabbing A Guy In A Bar

Dustin Diamond manages to duck a felony charge for stabbing a dude at a Wisconsin bar, but he might still go to jail for other stuff.

The Superficial | June 1, 2015 - 1:03 pm

Lindsay Lohan Is Basically Telling Everyone She’s A Flight Risk

Lindsay Lohan is telling friends and family she’ll flee to Monaco if she doesn’t finish her community service on time.

The Superficial | May 19, 2015 - 11:24 am

Lindsay Lohan Didn’t Do Her Community Service. Again.

Lindsay Lohan didn’t complete her community service for faking her community service, so situation normal. Everything’s as it should be.

The Superficial | May 7, 2015 - 11:05 am

Lindsay Lohan Is Trying To Buy Her Way Out of Jail Now

Lindsay Lohan is trying to buy her way out of community service with Esurance’s money, of course. Haha! She doesn’t have $10,000.

The Superficial | February 17, 2015 - 10:50 am

Lindsay Lohan: ‘Shaking People’s Hands Is Community Service’

Lindsay Lohan is in deep shit after submitting progress reports that count meet and greets with fans as community service and include dates that put her in two places at once.

The Superficial | January 28, 2015 - 1:38 pm

Everybody Cross Your Fingers, Chris Brown Might Go Back To Jail

Posted by Photo Boy
Just two Chris Brown posts ago, I suggested he violated his probation by being present at not one, but two incidents where people got shot. Turns out I’m a legal genius, because at a progress hearing yesterday his probation officer recommended that Chris go back to jail and who cares about…

Photo Boy | January 16, 2015 - 10:00 am

Teresa Giudice Is In Jail

In what is hopefully a continuing trend for every single reality star in 2015, Teresa Giudice reported to federal prison at 3 a.m. Monday morning where she’ll serve her 15 month sentence for bankruptcy fraud, according to WNBC 4 New York. And for those of you who don’t remember, Teresa went behind her crisis manager’s…

The Superficial | January 5, 2015 - 10:00 am

Teresa Giudice Got The ‘OITNB’ Prison, Doesn’t Want To Now

Yesterday, we learned that Teresa Giudice’s crisis manager fired her after Teresa went behind her back and filed a request to serve her time at Danbury Federal Prison in Connecticut which was the inspiration for Orange Is The New Black. And according to TMZ, she actually got approved except, just kidding, how about a nice…

The Superficial | October 23, 2014 - 2:48 pm

Teresa Giudice Fired By Crisis Manager For Trying To Book Her Own Jail

To catch everybody up, Teresa Giudice was sentenced to 15 months in prison for fraud. Her husband got 41 months, and the tears of their children will be reality fuel, but that’s not the most ridiculous part. The most ridiculous part is Teresa getting fired by her crisis manager for fucking up the entire sentencing…

The Superficial | October 22, 2014 - 11:15 am


“Why do all these words say ‘Punch Rihanna until the demons stop?’ Seems strange for a legal document…”
For those of you wondering what’s taken me this long to cover this, you’ll be surprised to learn that I didn’t hire Photo Boy for his speed and efficiency in mopping up gallons of semen from around…

The Superficial | March 18, 2014 - 12:07 pm

It’s The Justin Bieber Peeing Video

Jiggas and jiggerettes, the worldwide video premiere of “Drip 4 U Girl,” a #BBare Bizzle Joint.

Oh, girl,
I just want to drip my dang-a-lang, girl,
On to you like Lana Lang, girl,
I just want to drip my dang-a-lang, girl,
In to you like Lana Lang, girl
Oh my big black dang-a-lang, girl,

The Superficial | March 6, 2014 - 1:40 pm

Teresa Giudice Told Her Kids She’s Going To Jail While Filming ‘Real Housewives’

Reality television is a shithole inhabited by shitheads doing shitty things for shitty people to watch, so it really shouldn’t come as a surprise that Real Housewives of New Jersey star Teresa Giudice decided to exploit the most traumatic moment in her children’s lives so she has a better storyline than Carmella Meatball Buttafuoco Spaghetti.

The Superficial | March 6, 2014 - 11:13 am

Y’All’s About To See Justin #Bbare’s DANGALANG

Parentally it’s your berfdays because y’all’s about to see my boy B-Bare whippin’ his dick out and pissin’ all over da police.. station toilet where my jigga did hard time for lightin’ da streets a Miami on fire with yo mama’s panties. Thirty Mile Zizzone:
Law enforcement sources tell us … they fully intend to…

The Superficial | March 5, 2014 - 12:52 pm

Teresa & Joe Giudice Are Going To Jail

When we last left Teresa Giudice and her half-pug-person husband Joe, they were beating the shit out of photographers while on their way to court to fight 39 counts of bank fraud and tax evasion. A fight that apparently didn’t go very well because this morning they pleaded guilty to enough charges that they’ll both…

The Superficial | March 4, 2014 - 12:51 pm

Justin Bieber Rolled Over On His Mom?!! #DAAAAAMNN #calljerry

As the inescapable, innumerable, predeterminable saga of Justin Bieber, The Mephistopheles of Murda-Town, unfolds WORLDWIDE, welcome to the icest, ice-cold chapter of Ice-Man’s big balla brotha, motherfucking Freeze-Bone, because #disnigga here just rolled over on his moms. HIS OWN MOMS. Tupac and Biggie ain’t even that cold. Crack it off, TMZ:
Law enforcement sources tell…

The Superficial | January 24, 2014 - 10:25 am

Chris Brown’s In Rehab

One of the easiest ways for a celebrity to duck going to jail is to preemptively check into rehab and enjoy a 30 day vacation of spa treatments and Playstation. A hardship that Chris Brown has chosen to endure rather than throw himself at the mercy of a racist district attorney and her slight taps…

The Superficial | October 30, 2013 - 10:11 am

The Police Chief Who Signed Off On Chris Brown’s Community Service Just Resigned

Seen here wearing a hoodie with a naked Jesus about to get plowed by another dude on it because he’s a man of GAWD-AH, Chris Brown’s chances of proving he didn’t fake his bare minimum community service for beating the shit out of Rihanna just ate a huge Jesus-dick. TMZ reports:
The police chief who…

The Superficial | February 12, 2013 - 10:35 am

Just Once Chris Brown Would Like It If Y’All Stop Persecuting Him Like Jesus

“So you want to have sex with me even though you know I’ll kill you?”
“Uh huh.”
“See? This is exactly what Jesus went through. Exactly.
Yesterday, news broke that Chris Brown allegedly provided the court with fraudulent community service documents that his mom, may or may not, have helped him cooked up because apparently…

The Superficial | February 6, 2013 - 11:14 am

Chris Brown (Allegedly) Faked His Community Service, Is A F*cking Idiot

Earlier in the day we found these awesome shots of Rihanna posing for Terry Richardson, and now comes word that Chris Brown is probably going to jail because he and his mom allegedly faked the living shit out of his community service for beating Rihanna, so we really couldn’t have put these pics to a…

The Superficial | February 5, 2013 - 3:07 pm

And Shawn Holley Just Saved Lindsay Lohan From Going To Jail. Goddammit.

Lindsay Lohan’s still in London and her current lawyer Mark Heller can’t represent her in California yet, so all Shawn Holley had to do this morning was show up in court and tell the judge Lindsay fired her which would’ve resulted in a bench warrant for her arrest. Instead, despite still being owed $300,000, Shawn…

The Superficial | January 15, 2013 - 1:45 pm
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