Posts tagged "Heidi Klum"

That’s Heidi Klum’s Nipple

Heidi Klum topless- and you’re already in the post.

The Superficial / July 31, 2015

The 2015 Golden Globe Awards

I probably should’ve checked if there are any more awards show this month because here’s the rest of The 2015 Golden Globes that we may or may not have blown 75% of our photo budget on already. In our defense, it has boobs in it, and a Ruth Wilson pic that justifies whatever it i…

The Superficial / January 12, 2015

Heidi Klum’s Topless In This Post, Too

When I scheduled this morning’s Topless Heidi Klum Best of 2014 post last week so I could do jackshit over the last four days, I had no idea that Heidi would also spend this past weekend sunbathing topless in St. Barts. And yet here we are, so if this is part of Agent Klum’s Doomsday…

The Superficial / December 29, 2014

BEST OF 2014: Heidi Klum Topless

Welcome to the most wonderful time of the year where we get to recycle old posts with high click-through rates because a amazingly profitable portion of you are nothing but lemmings with erections to us. I don’t even have to write anything, that’s how foolproof this is. Spurgle blargle wogga wogga. See? That was nonsense.

The Superficial / December 29, 2014

The 2014 American Music Awards

Now that we’ve seen Nakedsaurus, Rise of The Sasquatch Nip Guardians, Cry For Me, Justintina, and BUTTFORCE 9000, here’s the rest of The 2014 American Music Awards which you’ll probably notice contains a disproportionate amount of Kate Beckinsale pics even though she’s not a musical artist. Like anyone else there was. Check your privilege.

The Superficial / November 24, 2014

It’s Heidi Klum’s Halloween Costume

Every Halloween Heidi Klum wears an overly elaborate costume as she’s done each year (except for last when she merely revealed her true form) since Hitler summoned her from the demonic realm to vanquish his enemies and festoon the Fatherland with topless tittery. So here she is transformed into a beautiful butterfly which I’m pretty…

The Superficial / November 3, 2014

Heidi Klum & Seal Might Get Back Together

“Oh, how I’ve missed your space boob…”
“Mind-bone me, Norrin Seal!”
According to In Touch Weekly, Heidi Klum and Seal might be getting back together after spending two years banging other people. So I’m just going to assume that was a simple matter of her agreeing to stay out of his camera room, and him…

The Superficial / June 19, 2014

Heidi Klum’s Still Topless

Here’s Day 2 of Heidi Klum’s topless vacation with 27-year-old Vito Schnabel who at one point was banging Demi Moore, but presumably saw Boba Fett crawl out of her stomach and called it a day. As for what that has to do with the price of flapjacks in Germany, who understands half of these posts,…

The Superficial / April 17, 2014

That’s Heidi Klum Completely Topless

So remember yesterday when I helped promote an inspirational site then people got butthurt about Creationist Cosmos? Well, now back to NAKED TITTIES. Whoo! Aw yeah! No thinking here! SCORE.

*drinks alone in the bathroom*
Photos: AKM-GSI, Pacific Coast News

The Superficial / April 16, 2014

That’s Heidi Klum’s Nipple

So far today I’ve told you that all the joy and magic has been sperminated out of the world, made you look at Justin Bieber pretend to be James Dean, and showed you the new Lady Gaga video and Scott Disick’s penis back-to-back. So to make up for that, here’s Heidi Klum’s nipple falling out…

The Superficial / March 24, 2014

Heidi Klum & Jessica Alba Are The Rest of The People’s Choice Awards

Considering we did one post about the People’s Choice Awards last year (Read: You forgot the boobs.), I entirely forgot they were a thing. But then Kat Dennings’ breasts changed all that because this year we have four posts, including a Bertney story, which will be forgotten in an hour because Heidi Klum and Jessica

The Superficial / January 9, 2014

Heidi Klum Still Owns Halloween

Every year for Halloween, Heidi Klum holds Rick Baker hostage until he transforms her into a reality-bending creation that unleashes the full power of Samhain in hopes of one day resurrecting Herr Fuhrer. So here’s Heidi making Guy Pearce in Prometheus look like fucking clown shoes, and then God willing, going home and asking her…

The Superficial / November 1, 2013

Heidi Klum Got Sunburn On Her Butt, Wants You To Look At It

Heidi Klum spent the weekend in the Bahamas where she apparently burnt her ass tanning which is amazing because I could’ve sworn Gwyneth Paltrow just said the sun’s our natural friend who could never hurt us. In fact, I bet that’s not even sunburn at all. That’s a moonburn! How much is that cratered bastard…

The Superficial / July 8, 2013

Good Morning, Heidi Klum, And Other News

- The Canadian Brangelina’s wedding song will be a duet. Of course. [Lainey Gossip]
– I’m not gonna lie, there is nothing more annoying than this. [Dlisted]
- Bare Backs Are Some Kind of Magic [theCHIVE]
– Who keeps putting Jessica Simpson in their weddings while she’s pregnant? [tooFab]
- The Insane Destruction Final “Man

The Superficial / June 18, 2013

Heidi Klum Got Attacked By Topless Protesters

Because Germany is a silly place, Heidi Klum was attacked by two topless protesters while filming Germany’s Next Top Model. As for what they’re protesting, who the hell knows? They wrote “Heidi Horror Picture Show” and “Sadistic Show” on their torsos in English, so either they’re demanding Heidi’s breasts stop being enslaved by Big Textile…

The Superficial / May 31, 2013

Anyone Want To See Heidi Klum’s Nipples?

Posted by Photo Boy
Originally, these Heidi Klum shots were going to be just one pic in today’s The Crap We Missed until I showed them to Fish. After he finished smacking my head with a rolled up newspaper and screaming, “Place multiple angles upon the Internet and either reference Adult Swim or call Kim…

Photo Boy / May 16, 2013

Blake Lively’s Cleavage And These Other People At The MET Gala

Posted by Photo Boy
So here’s everyone else at last night’s MET Gala, which was supposed to have something to do with punk rock, but I didn’t see Avril Lavigne there, so that can’t be right. *dodges broken bottles* I guess the point of this event is to raise a shit-ton of money and showcase…

Photo Boy / May 7, 2013

So Heidi Klum’s A Bionic Nazi Superwoman, There’s No Denying It Anymore

Earlier in the week, I made light of Heidi Klum claiming she “rescued” her son from drowning in the ocean, arrogantly thinking she embellished picking the kid up after a wave knocked him over. Then I saw these photos and JESUS CHRIST. Turns out Heidi Klum not only legitimately rescued her son and his nanny

The Superficial / April 4, 2013

Heidi Klum’s Cleavage Is The Crap We Missed

Welcome to the words below the breasts. It’s a little lonely down here, so I’ll pretend like some of you stuck around to find out why there’s a change in format today. Last night, Fish and I live-tweeted the Oscars, resulting in me not getting my usual headstart on an event-laden weekend along with a…

Photo Boy / February 25, 2013

Lindsay Lohan Somehow Invited To amfAR Gala

Last night’s amfAR Gala included such famous, beautiful faces as Heidi Klum, Doutzen Kroes and Ashley Greene (Sarah Jessica Parker was also there, but I’m pretty sure I was only listing beautiful people so shut your mouth.), yet somehow Lindsay Lohan was invited despite everyone else in attendance being working professionals who’ve earned the respect…

The Superficial / February 7, 2013
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