Gwyneth Paltrow

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Gwyneth Paltrow Gets That D

Gwyneth Paltrow has the sex. With her vagina.

The Superficial | April 12, 2016 - 11:59 am

A Moment For Gwyneth Paltrow’s Freshly Steamed Camel Toe

Gwyneth Paltrow’s camel toe will allow your pedestrian eyes to gaze upon its meticulously humidored rotunda.

The Superficial | March 16, 2016 - 12:04 pm

Here’s How Gwyneth Paltrow Rids Her Body Of Our Pedestrian Filth

Gwyneth Paltrow will not be sullied by the likes of you.

The Superficial | March 15, 2016 - 11:45 am

Gwyneth Paltrow Is ‘Taking A Break’ From Acting To Focus on GOOP

Gwyneth Paltrow will no longer grace us with her art. Be strong, my children. Be strong.

The Superficial | March 7, 2016 - 12:44 pm

Ladies and Gentlemen, We’ve Achieved Maximum Gwyneth Paltrow

This > Anything I’ve written about Gwyneth Paltrow. And ever will.

The Superficial | February 17, 2016 - 3:00 pm

Hmm, If Only Gwyneth Paltrow Could Make The Super Bowl About Her…

Gwyneth Paltrow has unrestricted access to the Blue Ivy. Turn your gaze upon her at once!

The Superficial | February 8, 2016 - 1:11 pm

Gwyneth Paltrow Sells Things On GOOP For $8, You Cheap Poor Hounds

Gwyneth Paltrow has a new interview in Glamour. It went exactly as you expected it to.

The Superficial | February 2, 2016 - 11:32 am

Gwyneth Paltrow Eats The Oreos, Like A Poor

Gwyneth Paltrow is familiar with your sandwich cookies.

The Superficial | January 14, 2016 - 11:58 am

Gwyneth Paltrow Loves Her GOOP Store Heist

Looks like someone learned a thing or two from Beyonce. IT FOLDED IN HALF!

Photo Boy | December 11, 2015 - 1:01 pm

Gwyneth Paltrow’s GOOP Store Got Robbed

Gwyneth Paltrow’s GOOP store actually has valuable shit worth stealing in it. Who knew?

The Superficial | December 8, 2015 - 1:18 pm

Gwyneth Paltrow Might Join ‘The View,’ It’s All Over For Us Now

Gwyneth Paltrow could bring vagina steams to daytime television.

The Superficial | November 10, 2015 - 2:15 pm

Today On ‘That’s So Gwyneth’: She Knew James Bond Before All Y’All

Gwyneth Paltrow knew James Bond before he was James Bond, and I mean, it’s not even like a big deal because this happens to her all the time.

The Superficial | September 22, 2015 - 11:57 am

Gwyneth Paltrow’s Son Loves Old Navy? GASP!

Gwyneth Paltrow’s son loves Old Navy. She has failed as a mother.

The Superficial | August 14, 2015 - 12:31 pm

GOOP Goes To Washington

Gwyneth Paltrow takes the battle against GMOs to Washington because our government is a shitshow and apparently has nothing better to do. …

The Superficial | August 6, 2015 - 2:30 pm
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