Posts tagged "Fifty Shades of Grey"

Aaron Taylor-Johnson’s Mom Just Quit ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’

Sam Taylor-Johnson has officially quit the 'Fifty Shades of Grey' franchise because I don't want to even spend 90 minutes watching the movie, so imagine years trying to make two more of them. I mean, Jesus.

By: The Superficial / March 26, 2015

Jessica Simpson Apparently Saw ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’

Jessica Simpson and Eric Johnson star in #FIFTYSHADESOFJOHNSON. (Yup, you just read that.)…

By: The Superficial / February 16, 2015

Dakota Johnson Stepped It Up And Other News

Amy Pascal talks Angelina Jolie and the Sony hack, LeAnn Rimes is desperate for attention, Elizabeth Warren dick punches Rand Paul, Diplo is a douche, and Keri Russel's butt is naked. Your morning links.

By: The Superficial / February 13, 2015

‘I’ve Made A Huge Mistake’ – These Two

Jamie Dornan and Dakota Johnson are raw sexuality if raw sexuality bores you to tears and makes you wonder if two people are secretly Amish.

By: The Superficial / February 6, 2015

‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ Has A Trailer

Here's the first official trailer for Fifty Shades of Grey which is interesting only in the sense that Hollywood has officially lowered itself to making a movie that's based on a book that was originally Twilight fan-fiction until the character's names were changed and Mormon abstinence was replaced with high-business pubes-pulling per Joseph Smith's original…

By: The Superficial / July 24, 2014

Jamie Dornan Will Pull Dakota Johnson’s Pubes For Your Mom Now

So remember when I said Aaron Taylor-Johnson is the new Christian Grey? Just kidding, it's whoever the fuck Jamie Dornan is. More importantly, Deadline reports it was almost Alexander Skarsgard who I'll just assume got tired of starring in shitty porn that tries to pretend it's not porn, but everybody knows it's porn. Plus thi…

By: The Superficial / October 24, 2013

Bertney And The Baby Goose

Bertney And The Baby Goose by Shel Silverstein Bertney liked being on radio shows. They always had her favorite candy while she waited. But Bertney didn't like when her publicist made her remember answers while she was trying to eat her candy. "These words don't fit in my brain," Bertney would say between bites of

By: The Superficial / October 18, 2013

Dakota Johnson Wants To Quit ‘Fifty Shades of Grey,’ Too, Now

Now that Charlie Hunnam's bailed, current Anastasia Steele Dakota Johnson, who's kind of got a young Gillian Anderson thing going on - *holds hand back from writing 'I Want To Believe' on penis* - is also thinking of jumping ship on Fifty Shades of Grey. Or "pulling tamp," as I'm now going to call it…

By: The Superficial / October 16, 2013

Aaron Taylor-Johnson Is Probably Christian Grey Now Because His Wife’s The Director

Oh, shit, I hear panties dropping already! SLAM. Four years ago, 19-year-old Aaron Taylor-Johnson, then just Aaron Johnson (Oh, yeah, he took her name.), started dating his 42-year-old Nowhere Boy director Sam Taylor-Wood before the two eventually married grossing everyone right the hell out. And, now, to make their relationship even weirder, she's probably going…

By: The Superficial / October 15, 2013

Charlie Hunnam Pulled Out (Get It? Like A Penis About To Ejaculate!) Of ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’

In case you haven't clicked on the 800 pulling out pun headlines this morning, Charlie Hunnam has dropped out of Fifty Shades of Grey which I'm sure had nothing to do with the insane online shit-fest over his casting and everything to do with the fact that he was about to make a movie based…

By: The Superficial / October 14, 2013

Here’s Your Live-Action Christian Grey, Ladies

Oh, good, he's already read the book. It seems like every week for at least the past two years, some famous movie star has been rumored to be one of the leads in Fifty Shades of Grey, the Twilight fan fiction turned erotic bestseller because your mom's into some freaky shit. But now, finally, the…

By: The Superficial / September 3, 2013