More Fergie stories

Good Morning, Fergie, And Other News

Ryan Reynolds’ life ended on Taylor Swift’s porch. [Lainey Gossip]

Caitlyn Jenner is allowed slightly near the RNC. [Dlisted]

UFC Octagon Girls: Who’d You Rather? [TMZ]

Pokemon Go is culling the weak. [Newser]

Your morning links. … More »

Fergie Made A Music Video About Breast Milk Or Something

Fergie’s here to help, feminism. Everything’s gonna be alright. More »

Rich F*cking Assholes Acting Like Hippies (Coachella)

It’s that time of the year again when celebrities spend thousands of dollars to hang out with other celebrities and pretend they’re all dirty hippies. More »

The 2014 American Music Awards

Now that we’ve seen Nakedsaurus, Rise of The Sasquatch Nip Guardians, Cry For Me, Justintina, and BUTTFORCE 9000, here’s the rest of The 2014 American Music Awards which you’ll probably notice contains a disproportionate amount of Kate Beckinsale pics even though she’s not a musical artist. Like anyone else there was. Check your privilege.
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Rich People Pretending To Be Groovy Hippies, Man

Now that we’ve seen Leonardo DiCaprio dancing, the continued effects of lupus on the mind, and British on Dutch foreplay, here’s the rest of the rich people pretending to be earth spirits or some stupid shit they told themselves on the jet ride over. In their defense, they only get 30-40 weeks a year to… More »

Excuse Me, Bill Clinton? I Think We Have Just What You’re Looking For

Posted by Photo Boy

Here’s Bill Clinton simultaneously raising money for an AIDS charity while admiring the swollen bosom of mom-to-be Fergie. I know the former president is now a globe-trotting philanthropist, who’s schedule doesn’t leave much time to be scouring the entire Internet for the huge, milk-enhanced breasts of celebrity mothers. And… More »

Fergie’s Pregnant? That Can’t Be Right

Seen here at a wine-tasting last week because why make your womb hospitable to a child that’s already an affront to God and nature? Fergie and Josh Duhamel announced on Twitter that they’ve procreated which means all that talk about finding Hitler’s lab and a large-fisted child with horns and a tail like that of… More »

Fergie Unveils Her Wax Statue, You May Begin Asking If It Has A Penis Now

Madame Tussauds in Vegas unveiled it’s latest addition yesterday: A wax statue of Fergie which I like to believe was quality tested by bringing Josh Duhamel in the room and seeing if he reflexively covered his anus and screamed, “I’ll be good!” Otherwise, all those candles died in vain. *pours a Mickey’s on the ground*More »

Fergie in a Bikini

I linked to a few of these on Just Jared yesterday, but here’s more of Fergie and Josh Duhamel on vacation in St. Barts which I’m mostly posting because I literally had no idea Fergie had such large breasts until New Year’s Eve. The whole thing’s like Brooke Hogan all over again, and honestly, I… More »

Josh Duhamel Kicked Off Plane

Seen here at Billboard’s Fifth Annual Women in Music event yesterday (But… but they have both have penises…), Josh Duhamel was kicked off a plane at La Guardia this morning after he refused to turn off his Blackberry before take-off. TMZ reports:

We’re told the flight attendant asked Josh to turn off the… More »

Miley Cyrus and The Rest of The AMAs

Because we can’t stare at Christina Aguilera’s blatant pregnancy or Taylor Swift’s new hotness all day – I’m kidding. Do exactly that. – here’s the last batch of photos I’m (hopefully) posting from Sunday night’s American Music Awards:

Miley Cyrus, who apparently decided not to sing a song made famous by the man… More »

Slash is Getting a Divorce

Proving a long-held theory of mine that rock stars should never get married because Mick Jagger is 106 and still gets free ass, Slash is reportedly divorcing his wife of nine years and, basing this on absolutely nothing but them being on the same stage this weekend (Journalism!), is now entangled in a an epic… More »

GOLDEN GLOBES: The people who weren’t Christina Hendricks’ breasts.

And now for a look at celebrities who attended last night Golden Globes but didn’t have stupid huge breasts like Christina Hendricks therefore rendering them dead to me:

Christina Aguilera with her rapidly shrinking chesticles. (Stop. Working. Out.)
Halle Berry whose chest has probably sold 85 billion copies of Swordfish. To me. More »

Who wants to see Fergie’s ass?

So here’s Fergie on the set of a Black Eyed Peas video this week and anyone else surprised at the shape of her ass? I always thought she worked out a lot so it’d look more sculpted like Hugh Jackman, or Ryan Reynolds. Or any other man focused on physical fitness for that matter. More »

Josh Duhamel shirtless plus Fergie talking about his giant penis

Seen here poolside in Atlanta over the weekend, Josh Duhamel apparently is “well-endowed,” according to Fergie’s interview with The Advocate. I’m not quite sure how the mechanics of that would work, but I’m guessing they do a lot of Spaceballs re-enacting in the bedroom.

FERGIE: I see your Schwartz is as big as… More »

Fergie has a penis. It’s official.

And that’s a cock. Well, folks, there’s not really much to say at this point except for “I told you so” followed by a slew of questions regarding the legality of Fergie and Josh Duhamel’s marriage in a post-Prop 8 California. That said, someone should probably check on Carrie Prejean and make sure she doesn’t… More »

Josh Duhamel wishes he punched Perez Hilton

Josh Duhamel stopped by Jimmy Kimmel Live! last night and, since he’s married to Fergie, the conversation obviously turned towards Sunday’s incident involving Perez Hilton and the Black Eyed Peas:

On the situation in general:
“I try not to get into it especially now because I don’t think he deserves that much. He’s… More »

Kanye West’s new Louis Vuitton ad has to feel awkward

- Paris Hilton’s reality show My New BFF is up for a Teen Choice Award. — We’re never going to live like Star Trek are we? Sonofabitch… [PopSugar]

- Chris Brown brought a Rihanna lookalike to last night’s NBA finals game. Kudos to that young lady who could’ve saved herself the effort and… More »

Carrie Prejean gets pissy on Today

- Carrie Prejean’s leaked e-mails between Miss California director Keith Lewis prove she was a massive pain in the ass – with fake breasts, so let’s forgive her! Sorry, reflex action. [The Blemish]

- Rihanna and Chris Brown coincidentally attended the Lakers game last night but sat separately. Which means they’re… More »

Jon & Kate Plus Televised Marriage Counseling

- Jon & Kate Gosselin are letting TLC tape their marriage counseling sessions. You know what they should tape? The child support hearings. Mostly because I’ve always wanted to see the look of a man forced to pay $1 million/month and wear a court-ordered condom for the rest of his life. [Jezebel]

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